Broken Glass

I pulled my truck into the school parking lot, feeling a little ashamed about how I treated Alexis. Fuck. I rested my head on the steering wheel as I turned off the engine. I know I’m a dick, but this time I let my anger go too far. Ugh, shit.

Before I had figured out what to say to Alexis, there was a knock on my truck door. I lifted my head and saw that it was Alexis standing there with a smirk on his face and mischief sparkling in his blue eyes. I shook my head and took my keys out of the ignition. I grabbed my backpack, with barely any school supplies within, and slid out of my truck. I slammed the door and glanced at Alexis.

“You calm now?” He asked with raised eye brows.

“As much as I can be.” I muttered.

Alexis reached up and patted me on the shoulder, “Good.”

I shook my head but didn’t say anything else. I was drowning in my thoughts. She just wouldn’t leave my mind. Fuck. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. Before I had realized it, Alexis and I had made it to the classroom.

As we took our seats, which happened to be at the same desk, I set my backpack down on the table. I rested my elbow on the table and set my chin into my palm. God damn it Sable, just forget about her already. I sighed again. I heard Alexis grunt and glanced over at him. Alexis raised his eye brows at me.

“What happened to the rage ball I know?” He whispered, because the teacher had come in a few minutes ago. Even though I wasn’t actually listening to a word the teach was saying.

I glowered at Alexis as I straightened and mumbled, “Shut up.”

Alexis snickered under his breath, and if I hadn’t been so damn preoccupied with thoughts of Emily I probably would have punched him right then and there. I went through a few more classes, while in a daze, until school was over. I had a few more hours until my janitorial shift, so Alexis had insisted on going to a second lunch. For such a slim guy he really likes to eat.

I slammed my head against the table we were sitting at, probably earning some concerned looks from the surrounding people. Fuck me. Why can’t I stop thinking about a stranger?

“Okay man, what the hell is going on with you?” Alexis asked, his voice lacking concern and filled with curiosity.

I turned my head so I could look at him. “I may have…feelings…”

“No shit.” Alexis snorted and took a huge bite of his burger.

“For another person…” I finished. His eyes widened as he choked on his bite of food. Alexis coughed and spit out some bits of burger. Alexis pounded his chest a little and drank some water. I admit I was kind of pissed at how surprised he was, I mean what am I some kind of sucking black void?

“As in a girl?” Alexis questioned, his expression was completely dumbfounded.

“Yes, dickhead, for a girl.” I sat up, ready to slug him.

Alexis grinned, getting over his shock, “Well I’ll be damned, my friend Sable is actually turning into a person.”

“Jackass.” I grunted and wrapped my arm around his head. I rubbed my fist on his head while he cried for mercy.

“Not the hair man!” Alexis cried, struggling to get out of my grip. I released him and crossed my arms. I watched Alexis in amusement as he hurriedly combed his fingers through his blonde hair. Alexis glared at me before taking an angry bite of his burger.

I took a sip of my soda, contemplating whether or not I wanted to share more information. Alexis wasn’t a blabber mouth or anything, but he would try to ‘help’ me. Whenever Alexis tried to ‘help’ someone it always ends badly. Mostly because Alexis comes up with these schemes that sound good in theory, but once they’re put into action… It’s like what the fuck am I doing again?

“So what’s her name?” Alexis inquired after he had finished his burger.

“Emily.” I breathed out, her name sounded so pleasant rolling off my tongue. I blinked in surprise. Where did these mushy feelings come from? Fuck Sable, just fuck.

“What’s she look like?” Alexis had turned toward me now, he was extremely curious. I sighed, fuck, there is no use trying to derail him now.

“Light brown hair that almost looks blonde when it catches the sunlight. And her eyes are these amazing shade of gray. She’s small, but she wasn’t even slightly afraid of me.” I murmured as I rested my hand in my palm. Is love at first sight even possible? Do I even deserve to fall in love?

Alexis patted me on the back, “Are you going to try to find her?”

“I don’t know.”

“Don’t you want to find her?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well, don’t you like her?”

“I don’t know.” I hissed through my teeth. I’d never had feelings like these before. I wasn’t sure what to do with them. Hell, I wasn’t even sure how to explain them.

“Alright, alright. I’ll back off,” Alexis words were very different from his tone, “I have a gig tonight at Club Bleu. You should come.”

Alexis had been spending his entire childhood learning to play the guitar. Now that he’d mastered it, he’d been trying his hand at songwriting. Of course, he refuses to let me read any of his songs or even hear him play unless I come to see him at a gig.

“What time tonight?” I asked, wondering if I could even manage to convince my boss to let me off early or if I could make it before my shift began.

“The club opens at six, but I go on at about seven.” Alexis said before sliding over a piece of paper. I picked it up and realized it was a ticket to get in.

“Okay, I’ll come.” I commented as I pocketed the blue ticket that had the white words Club Bleu scrawled across it in swirling letters.

xxx

I pulled on a short sleeved white shirt and slid my arms into my leather jacket, wincing as my hands twanged. After I had cleaned up my mess from yesterday I had gotten my school work done—not that I really give a crap about it. I was hurrying so I could make it to Alexis’s gig. The only reason I’m probably still in school is because my mom is determined to get me an education. Over her dead body would I drop out of school.

I pounded down the stairs, it was about five after six, and saw my little sister sitting at the kitchen table. She smiled at me, so easy to forgive me for my sins. She had a plate of spaghetti in front of her and she was watching some cartoon on the TV. I ruffled her hair and sat down next to her.

“How was school Lily?”

“We’re doing a play, only for the 6th graders this time. It’s Peter Pan, and I got the roll of Wendy.” Lily’s brown eyes were shinning with excitement.

“That’s amazing Lil, I can’t wait to see you’re performance.”

Lily’s eyes lit up, “Really Sable? You’ll really come see the play?”

“Absolutely.”

Lily sprang out of her seat and into my arms. I hugged her to me. I loved my little sister, and I really wished I was a better person for her. After giving me a good squeeze Lily pulled back and sat back in her own seat. She swung her legs back-in-forth and finished her dinner with a big grin. I chuckled and wiped the remaining tomato sauce off the sides of her lips.

I ruffled her hair and stood to go. I caught my mom watching us from the doorway. She had a loving, softness in her brown eyes. I walked over to her, ready to get down on my knees and beg for forgiveness. Before I could open my mouth to say anything, my mom put her frail arms around me. She works at the local Motel during Lily’s school hours. The pay isn’t the best, but it helps.

“I’ve got to go.” I mumbled into her shoulder and she released me.

I trudged away, glancing back at Lily and my mother before walking out the front door. I climbed into my truck and drove down the street. The sun had already sunk low in the sky by the time I reached Club Bleu. The parking lot was almost completely full. I pulled into a space and parked. I slipped the ticket out of my pocket as I walked up to the bouncer. This is the only gig I’ve actually made it to out of three—this is his third gig.

That’s when I realized the ticket said VIP, I looked at it in surprise. If I remember correctly, Alexis had told me—when he got his first gig—that Club Bleu only gives out one VIP ticket per artist. A gnawing feeling pulled at my heart. Fuck Sable. I felt like a dick for not coming to his performance the other times. Screw your stupid janitorial job, it doesn’t pay that good anyways. You should have supported your friend, you dick.

There was a long line of people that were still waiting for their chance to get in, but all I had to do was walk straight up to the bouncer. He looked at my VIP ticket and then handed it back to me. I nodded in thanks and walked through the door. I made my way to the closed off VIP section. The woman managing the section eyed me suspiciously but let me through after checking for my name.

I settled into one of the chairs along with a small table with a red candle on it. The VIP section—with small booths for couples and single chairs and a table—differed greatly from the regular section. The VIP section was close and to the right of the stage, while the regular section was off to the left and the back with only a few tables to stand around. I felt very grateful, and a tad guilty, for the ticket Alexis gave me.

After a few performances, it was finally Alexis’s turn. When Alexis took his seat in front of the microphone with his guitar, his eyes scanned the VIP section and fell on me. His lips curled up into a half smile before he started.

“This first song is called Just Say Hey.” Alexis said, his voice reverberating through the room. He started to play his acoustic guitar, slow and sweet. Then his voice started to sweep through the room, and his voice was amazing:



The guitar sound was melodic, like the saddest song, and you could tell that the crowd was loving him. He was an amazing musician. I let my gaze drift from Alexis to wonder over the crowd. When my eyes came to rest on a familiar face. My heart jumped in my chest when I recognized her, Emily. She was sitting across the VIP section. The strange part was that she was already looking a me. Alexis’s voice started again:



Before I knew what I was doing, I was in a standing position. I wanted to talk to her. Damn it Sable. My heart was screaming at me to move toward her, but my feet felt like lead. She blushed under my steady gaze and glanced away. I noticed that she was sitting with a girl friend. The two of them were giggling together. Her friend whispered something into her ear and Emily looked back at me. Emily’s lips turned up into a small smile, a small delicate smile. I couldn’t help but smile back. Alexis’s voice continued to reverberate through the air:



My feet finally started moving, almost like Alexis’s voice was cheering me on. I pushed my way through the crowd. I wasn’t going to let my chance fly by, I was going to take it. I reached Emily’s booth just as Alexis finished his song. His words sent chills down my spine:



The crowd went wild, clapping and howling cheers but I was only looking at Emily. I didn’t even see her friend sitting next to her. I couldn’t see anything else but her.

“Hi.” She said softly, and somehow I heard her over the roaring crowd.

“Hey.” I whispered back as I offered a half smile.

The crowd settled down after Alexis started to play again. His melody drifted in but I didn’t hear a word he said. I was standing there, like an idiot, just staring at Emily. But she didn’t seem to mind because she was staring right back.

“Do you want to sit down?” Her friend awkwardly broke the silence. “I’m Jenifer, by the way.”

I nodded and replied, “Sable,” as I took her outstretched hand.

I sat on the other side of the table. Emily shyly glanced down at her drink while her friend looked me over. I could already see the judgment churning around in her head. But because Emily was sitting right next to her, I somehow managed to rein in my anger and crass statements. C’mon Sable, you know how to speak pleasantly don’t you? Say something, don’t just stare. Damn it, say something!

“Do you come here often?” I asked. Nailed it, totally nailed it. I felt like slapping myself. That’s the best you could come up with? Ugh.

Jenifer looked like she was trying not to laugh as she nodded. Emily—not so subtly—elbowed Jenifer in the side.

“So what brings you here?” Jenifer inquired, trying to be nice for Emily’s sake.

“My friend Alexis.” I commented and pointed to the stage, Alexis was still singing. Jenifer looked surprised and her cheeks flushed red when she glanced at Alexis. She couldn’t possibly…like Alexis…could she? I mean he was an amazing musician, there’s no doubt about that, but I’ve never seen him keep a relationship longer than a week. He had said something about wanted to get a taste of everything.

“Do you think you could introduce us?” Jenifer asked. I was kind of pissed that I wasn’t getting to talk to Emily at all.

“Sure.” I mumbled through tight lips. Don’t snarl, don’t be mean. Be nice. I turned my attention to the stage as Alexis thanked the crowd for listening and disappeared backstage. He’d be out here in a few minutes.

Emily’s silence was killing me. She was absently turning her straw around in her drink, and she kept sending me fleeting glances.

“Hey Sable, who are your friends?” Alexis appeared seemingly out of nowhere, and slid into the booth next to me.

“I’m Jenifer and this is Emily.” Jenifer’s face lit up like fireworks in the night sky. A devilish look appeared in Alexis’s eyes when he put two and two together. He glanced toward me and wiggled his eye brows. Great. Just fucking fantastic.

“You’re songwriting is really amazing.” Emily commented, breaking out of her shyness. I tried my hardest to not jump at the bit and say something stupid.

“Thank you, I work really hard on it. But I’m not as amazing as this guy here.” Alexis replied and jerked his thumb toward me. I wanted to slam my head against the table, over and over again.

Emily giggled and brought her sweet eyes to mine. I offered a half smile and a shrug. Emily turned and whispered something to Jenifer before excusing herself. I wanted—no—I needed to chase after her. Alexis saw my pleading look and winked at me, silently saying “I got this man.”

Alexis stood out of the booth and slid right next to Jenifer, who now looked just happy as could be. I send a thankful look Alexis’s way, before charging through the crowd after Emily.

Emily was making her way toward the exit and I was doing all I could to get through the packed, writhing bodies. I couldn’t hear anything around me but my screaming, beating heart. Damn it, Sable. Move faster. I reached the exit just moments after Emily, but once I got out into the parking lot she was no where to be found.

I stood there with my throbbing heart, feeling like an idiot, as it started to lightly rain. I sighed, I lost another chance. I don’t know if I’ll ever get another one. I shook my head. It obviously just wasn’t meant to be. I walked toward my car, it was parked right next to a small alley way. I was about to open my car door when I heard this very soft, pitiful sound. I turned around, searching the flickering lamp-lit dark for the source of the sound. I took a few steps toward the alley way.

As the darkened lamp came to life, I saw a big cardboard box. It looked tattered and half damp. A small black head rose above the edge of the box. I knelt down and saw a shivering black kitten. The kitten still had blue eyes, and couldn’t be more than a few weeks old. You poor thing. I couldn’t resist the whimpering look it was giving me.

“Come here.” I murmured and picked up the helpless, wet creature. I tucked the kitten into my arms and stood. The kitten gave a grateful little meow. “Yeah, don’t worry I won’t abandon you. We’re two of a kind.”

I was about to go back to my car when I heard a soft, sweet laugh. I saw Emily standing a few feet away with wet hair. She came walking toward me with a brilliant smile on her face. My cheeks heated at her smile.

“Can I see?” She asked and held out her small, pale hands. I nodded, my voice caught in my throat. Emily was the only person who made me stupidly, utterly speechless.

Emily took the little kitten into her arms and this warm look spread across her face. She inspected the kitten, I wasn’t sure exactly what she was looking for. Emily nodded in satisfaction.

“It’s a girl.” Emily handed the kitten back to me, “Take good care of her and I’ll make sure to come and visit.” Emily skipped off, her gloom replaced by momentary cheerfulness.

“Promise.” I whispered as I watched Emily disappear. The little kitten meowed in approval. I glanced down at the kitten. Like that as a name, huh? Promise it is.