In Another Life

After Mum yawns for the third time in twenty minutes (although she does so delicately into her shoulder, and using her elbow as a screen), I clear my throat and interrupt the current love-fest that Owi and Cadi have both been inflicting on Teagan for the last half an hour.

That poor child has no idea what she’s in for, for the rest of her life.

“All right, ladies,” I smile as both my sisters and my mother turn to look at me. “Mum needs her rest, so let’s say our goodbyes.” I raise my eyebrow up at Owi, who immediately starts to whine and pout.

She pointedly ignores my stern look, and nuzzles Mum’s shoulder. “But I don’t want to go. We just got here.”

“We got here nearly six hours ago, Owi.” I reply, standing up and moving for my sisters’ coats. “We’ve had lunch with Mum, we’ve snuggled with Teagan, we’ve been driving them insane all afternoon. Come on, then.”

Harry, who has spent the last hour or so deep in conversation with Tad, also stands upon hearing my words. He smiles widely at Cadi, who slips off of the bed and moves for her jacket without saying a word. “It’s almost dinner time, Owi. What do you want to eat for supper?”

“I want to stay with Mummy,” She latches on to Mum’s upper arm and allows her lower lip to tremble dramatically.

Mum kisses Owi’s temple softly, and then brushes the flyaway hairs away from her daughter’s face. “I’ll be home tomorrow, love. Now go home with your sister, and behave yourself. You can help me with Teagan tomorrow night.”

Because she hasn’t had a nap today, and because it’s been a day full of brand new adventures and excitement, Owi starts to meltdown at the prospect of having to leave. Of course, now that I think about it, this is the first extended period of time that my sister has spent without Mum. So obviously after she’d gotten over the excitement of me returning home, and of Harry being a new playmate, she would realize that she’s without her mother for the first time, and that is a horridly frightening prospect for a young toddler.

Naturally, as if to undermine the fact that Owi is no longer the baby of the family, Teagan chooses this moment as the time to start that high-pitched keening wail of a newborn baby.

I reach across the bed and scoop my sister off of Mum’s lap, despite the way she goes boneless and limp in an attempt to keep me from picking her up. As I settle her on my hip and tuck her head beneath my chin, I sooth her softly and rub at her back lightly.

“Now, now, Owi,” I murmur, as the poor girl wraps her arms around me and starts to sob heavily. “It’s not all that bad, is it? Mum will be home tomorrow, before you even know it, so it’s really quite silly that you’re crying so much.”

She doesn’t respond. Instead she clings more tightly to my body and buries her face in the crook of my neck. Her sobs are wracking her little body, and I can feel the dampness of her tears upon my skin.

I know that right now, hearing Owi wail like a wounded animal is the last thing that my parents need to hear. So I finish gathering up the small girl in my arms and make my way out of Mum’s room and into the hallway. I walk until I find a small, unoccupied nook, and then I settle down in an empty armchair with cushions that are far too thin and an oversized spring that digs into my back.

I can feel eyes upon me, and I look up to see Harry watching me with his brow furrowed in concern. The stormy apprehension in his eyes abates slightly as he realizes that I’ve noticed his gaze. He raises his eyebrows slightly, and then smiles that brilliant, beaming grin that makes my heart wrench so.

I turn my attention back to my sibling and take my time soothing and whispering and rocking as her cries soften into whimpers and then stop altogether. Her breath catches involuntarily in her throat every so often, and she shudders dramatically in my grasp.

“Are you feeling better,” I whisper, using the pad of my thumb to wipe away the trace of tears that scatter down her rosy cheek. “After that absolutely ludicrous display of a tantrum?” My only answer is a hiccup and a sniffle. “What happened, Owi? Are you just tired?”

She pushes herself away from me with a shuddering breath and then rubs at her eyes. She looks so innocent and small in this moment, and I have to remind myself that she’s only five-years-old. All of this is all so new and frightening for her.

“I’ll tell you what, my love.” I begin, running my fingers through her matted hair and then tucking it back behind her ear as she looks up at me with wide, pitiful eyes. “Let’s go back and say our goodbyes, and then we’ll find you something to eat, okay? And after we eat, we’ll go home and have a hot bath and then I will read a story to you—”

“—two stories,” Owi interrupts.

I have to work quickly to stop myself from laughing, but I manage to nod solemnly. “I will read you two stories, and then we’ll both go to sleep, and when we wake, Mum and Tad will probably be on their way back home with Teagan. How does that sound?”

Owi runs her wrist beneath her nose, and I have to resist the urge to demand that she uses a tissue instead of her sleeve. Now is not the time. “Good.”

“Perfect,” I smile at her, and then use my fingertips to wipe away the rest of her nearly dried tears. “Let’s go get our coats then, shall we?”

As she slides off of my lap, I straighten out her top from where it’s ridden up and then I bestow upon her a brilliant smile. The grin she offers back to me is a wobbly one, though she does seem marginally happier than she did five minutes ago. So I stand up myself and hold out my hand, which she takes and then leans up against my forearm as we start to make our way back to the rest of our family.

Harry falls into step beside me, and he knocks his elbow into my side before nodding his head at my quiet sister. “You handled that really well.”

“I’m quite the expert when it comes to diffusing time bombs,” I quip back, only slightly joking. “You don’t mind, do you?” When Harry raises his eyebrows up at me questioningly, I carry on. “Stopping for food on the way home? Somehow I think that talking her down a second time might not be so successful.”

“I don’t mind at all,” Harry quickens his pace slightly, and then tugs open the door to Mum’s room for me. “After you, darling.”

I reward him with a brilliant smile and a soft touch to his cheek before I allow Owi to pull me forward into the room. Mum is nursing Teagan, though she immediately calls Owi to her side, and so I relinquish my hold on her quite easily.

Meanwhile, Griffith has put his phone down long enough to help Cadi into her jacket. He’s busy winding her scarf around her neck, and nodding at Tad, who looks quite serious as I catch snatches of their conversation. ‘Stay home’ and ‘don’t give your sister any trouble’ are all I need to hear before I realize that my brother more than likely wants to head out with some of his mates and not be stuck at home with his older sister and her boyfriend.

Tad ends their rather one-sided discussion, and then moves on to me. “Is everything okay back home, Bumblebee?”

I nod, reaching for my own jacket. “Everything is fine. Harry and I were actually going to take the kids out for dinner before we went home, and then I was going to go put the girls down for the evening. They’re both tired.”

And as if to underline my words, Cadi erupts into a massive yawn that nearly takes over her whole face. Tad smiles fondly down at her before he reaches into his pocket and pulls out his wallet. Before I can register what he’s doing, he’s pressed a few bills into my hand.

“Tad, you don’t have to do that,” I begin, feeling incredibly guilty for accepting his money, but he cuts me off with a wave of his hand.

“I’m not going to let you pay for feeding your siblings, Bee. Now get them some food, and then get them home. I’ll call you tonight to let your mother say goodnight to the girls,” He seems tired, but happy, as he envelopes me in a tight hug and then kisses my cheek lightly.

I nod, and tuck the money into the pocket of my jeans, before I finish zipping up my jacket. “Are we all ready to go?” I ask, turning to address the rest of the room.

Both Griffith and Cadi are standing next to the door, and Cadi is holding on to Griffith’s hand adorably. Owi, having snuggled sufficiently with Mum, reluctantly climbs off of the bed and lets Harry help her into her jacket before he picks her up and settles her on his hip.

“Be good for your sister,” Mum yawns into her fist, smiling tenderly at the sight of all of us clumped around the doorway. “And I’ll be home first thing in the morning.”

It takes us a few more moments to actually get out of the room and out of the hospital. Owi has perked up considerably once I announced that we were going to the pub for supper, and she spent the entire ride nattering on and on about how the last time Mum and Tad took her here, there were dogs actually inside the pub.

Harry parks the car just down the street from the restaurant, and we hurry down the road in order to get in out of the cold. It started snowing some time while we were visiting with Mum, and it’s a cold, wet snow that soaks through the clothes and leaves one feeling damp and frigid.

Griff is the first one inside, and as he stamps his feet and shakes his hair out of his face, a waitress behind the bar waves the rest of us inside into the warmth. She laughs once she catches sight of both Cadi and Owi bundled up in their winter clothes.

“Why if it isn’t the Matthews brood?” She finishes pouring a draft and sets it down in front of a man before she comes around the bar. “I expect you were at hospital visiting your mum and that new baby?”

Owi nods and grins toothily up at Aggie. “Mummy had a girl!”

Aggie is the owner of The Purple Dog Pub, and she’s been a fixture here for as long as I can recall. Back when I lived here, we’d pop in for a Sunday roast at least once a month, and Aggie has always been back by the taps with a wide smile and a bit of candy in her pocket for small children. I think she started off as a barmaid once upon a time, and then kept on until the previous owner passed away. She bought the pub, which had been quite dingy and gross before, redone it so it was bright, roomy and comfortable, and never looked back.

“Well done. Congratulations to you then, big sisters.” Aggie stops in front of the girls with her hands on her hips. She quickly looks past them to see me on the threshold, and her surprise isn’t hard to find. “Why if it isn’t Bryn Matthews!”

“Hello, Aggie,” I smile and reach forward to hug her. “How are you?”

She hugs me, patting my back lightly before taking a step back. “You know me, I’m just fine. Back in town for Baby?”

“To help out Mum and Tad, yeah,” I admit, brushing the snow off of my jacket. “And now we’re here for some supper, because I haven’t had a decent bite of chicken since I left this place.”

Harry steps in beside me and then reaches back to stop the door from slamming back into place. “Chicken? Count me in, that sounds absolutely amazing. I’m starving.”

Aggie’s gaze flits back to Harry, and then up to me, before it bounces back to Harry. To her credit, her smile doesn’t fade, though I do watch as her eyebrows rise up towards her hairline. Instead, she nods her head and carries on speaking. “I’ll let you settle down in the back room then, shall I? What’ll you have for drinks?”

Both of the girls want water, and Griff orders a soda, before they disappear around the corner in the direction of the dining area. I’m not sure if it’s sad or just pathetic that my siblings seem to be so comfortable in this pub. Tad has been coming here for years, and I, myself, had spent many an evening here growing up. It’s plain to see that that’s one Matthews’ family tradition that stuck around, even after I moved away to London.

“The usual for you?” Aggie asks, and I nod and smile at her before I look back at Harry.

He’s paying more attention to the television that’s playing off to the side, though to his credit, he does break his gaze once he realizes that I’m looking at him. He looks slightly bewildered to see me staring at him. “Hi?”

“Nothing,” I smile, slipping my arm around his own and pulling him forward. “Let’s find the girls before they destroy something.”

He allows me to pull him forward and into the back room where my siblings are currently setting up at a table in the back. Griffith has pulled his mobile charger out and is plugged into the wall, the screen lighting up his face with a blueish tint. Owi has her face plastered against the glass screen on the old fashioned jukebox, and she’s flipping through the albums, as if she’s actually able to read the titles. Cadi’s jacket is hanging neatly from a chair, though she’s no where to be found.

“Owi, where’s your sister?” I ask, letting go of Harry and unwinding my scarf from around my neck.

She doesn’t turn around, nor does her finger move from the button that rotates the albums. “Don’t know.”

“Glad to see she’s recovered from her tantrum,” I unzip my jacket and shrug out of it. “She’s super talkative now.”

Harry smiles before he takes a seat at the table. “Clearly you don’t have that problem.”

“Ooh,” I hold out the syllable and pull a face at him, before rearranging my look into that of an unimpressed one. “You’re awful.”

“And yet, you keep me around,” He smiles as Aggie walks into the room, tray in grasp and my sister just behind her. “I found your sister.”

“You didn’t find her,” I roll my eyes and stand up to help Aggie hand out the drinks. “Let me help you with that, Aggie.”

“No worries,” Aggie sets a beer down in front of Harry, and the foam runs up and over the lip before it pools out on the table. She flicks her wrist, flinging the foam off of her hand before wiping it on her apron.

I do have to cringe, only because I’ve just now realized how some people might not think that it’s very sanitary. And I don’t have to take a look around the room to realize that we are very, very far from London. We’re in a cozy little pub in my hometown that probably wouldn’t be Harry’s first choice in where to hang out.

Owi climbs up onto the chair next to me and sighs heavily. “I want the sausage and chips, Bryn.”

“Easy there,” I help her settle down in her chair. “Aggie isn’t ready to take your order yet.”

Aggie has finished handing out the drinks, and turns back to me with a knowing look. I watch as her gaze flits between Harry and me a few times, though Harry remains blissfully unaware, as he’s busy looking at the menu. “I’m ready if you’re all ready.”

“I-I think we are,” As I already know what I’m getting, I touch Cadi’s wrist lightly. “Lovey, what do you want to eat?”

“Fish and chips, please.” Cadi doesn’t look up from where she’s busy unfolding the coloring packet that she’d somehow pulled out of nowhere. I guess she went behind the bar to grab some crayons, which would explain why she disappeared for a few moments.

“Excellent, I’ll have the hunter’s chicken, please. Griff?” I look over at my brother expectantly.

He doesn’t even move his phone away from his face. “I’ll have the New Orleans’ King burger with chips.”

“I’m so glad that you’re this engaged with our conversation,” I mutter under my breath, resisting the urge to roll my eyes.

Harry starts to laugh, though he covers it with a soft cough before he shuts his menu and looks up at an expectant Aggie. “I think that I will try the juicy Lucy burger, please.”

“Do you want chips with that?” Aggie asks, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Sure,” Harry smiles winningly up at her before Aggie nods and leaves the room.

For a short moment, both of my sisters are completely absorbed in coloring on their play mats and Griffith is still glued to his mobile, the screen lighting up his face and his thumbs moving rapidly across his keyboard.

“I’m so glad that we’re all here together for the holidays,” My gaze flicks over to Harry, who starts to laugh at my words. “I mean, seriously. It’s like we’re completely not even in the room… even the girls are ignoring me.”

“And it only took them a little over 24 hours to get over you,” He teases, placing his open hand on my thigh and squeezing lightly. “You’re completely replaceable, Bryn—especially now that there’s another sister to replace you.”

“I-I’m not sure how I feel about that,” I roll my eyes at him. “Although Teagan is super cute, so it’s completely understandable. Isn’t she adorable?”

Harry begins to absentmindedly draw shapes on my leg with the nail of his thumb. “She is cute.”

I place my hands on top of his before I tangle our fingers up together. “Clearly you’re super comfortable discussing this topic of conversation.”

“Of course I am,” He scoffs, his eyes twinkling merrily. “What man doesn’t love debating the cuteness factor of a newborn baby?”

“Clearly an insecure one,” I have to work hard to keep myself from starting to laugh. I adore these moments between the two of us—the ones where we start to goof off between the two of us, where no topic of conversation is off limits, and no matter how weird conversations get between the two of us, I know that it’s something that stays between the two of us. I treasure these moments more than I can say, and I know that Harry does, as well. We're probably a bit more sarcastic than most couples, and there is definitely more eye rolling, but I wouldn't change any of that for the world.

As I study his profile, I can feel a content smile work its way onto my face. He hasn’t shaved in a few days, so he’s accumulated quite a bit of growth that I find incredibly attractive, despite facial hair not really being something I’ve liked previously. His hair hasn’t been styled, and it’s actually quite flat because he wore a beanie for most of the day, and I know he’s only pulled it off because of the wet snow that soaked through all of our clothing. And I know that those sweet blue eyes are wide and clear and will probably start sparkling at any moment with some sort of mischief.

Even though I’m not doing anything, I can feel my heart start to speed up and I have to work hard to keep my emotions from completely taking over. My eyes have suddenly gone all misty, and I have to blink rather rapidly to stop the tears from building up.

God, I really need to get a grip on things. I’m about to start weeping into my beer. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

But as soon as these thoughts enter my head, I push them away resolutely. I love Harry, I do. I need to tell him how I feel, because I know that he feels the same. I mean, I-I’m pretty sure that he feels the same. All of the signs are there! It’s just a matter of actually… y'know, voicing them.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Harry’s voice breaks through my consciousness, and I come back to our conversation. “You looked pretty serious there.”

And I know that now is not the time to have our heart to heart conversation. I also know that it’s something that has to be done, because I’m driving myself insane and I’m ready to take that next step with Harry.

“I am seriously starving,” I deflect nicely, and I know that both he and I are very much aware of it. “But,” I speak up again almost immediately. “I don’t think it’s something that I can’t fix with food.”

“Eat until the holes in your heart are full,” Harry’s smiling that crooked, little smile that makes my heart skip a beat.

So it’s reluctantly that I stand up and let go of my boyfriend’s hand. I gather together my hair over one shoulder and then straighten out my top. “I’m going to see if I can get something to eat before the food comes. And yes, I know how bad that sounds: getting food before the rest of the food.”

Harry raises his hands up in a mock-surrender. “I didn’t say anything.”

“But I could hear the judgment,” I laugh, and before I can stop myself, I reach out and run the back of my hand down his cheek before I realize what I’ve done.

God, Bryn, could you get any more creepy?

And so it’s with flushed cheeks that I rush out of the room, pointedly ignoring Harry’s peals of laughter and Owi’s questioning. I speed around the corner, and then slow down once I realize just how insane I’ll look if I pop out from around the corner at top speed.

Just as I start to make my way towards the bar where I know I can find Aggie and hopefully something to snack on, I hear Aggie’s raspy voice ringing out from where I know she’ll be behind the bar, pouring from the tap and cashing out patrons. For some reason, she sounds quite cross with someone and as that isn’t like the merry bar owner that I know, I take a second to listen. And also because I’m kindof nosy.

“The back room is closed,” Aggie announces, and closes the till with a bit of a bang. “You’ll have to eat out here.”

I frown at her words. The back room is never closed, like ever… especially on a Friday night. A person is more likely to find half of the village at the pub on a weekend night, and Aggie kept both the front and back room full and continually turned tables over. She’d be crazy to block off a section of it, and effectively cut out half of her night’s profits.

Especially because we’re in the back room and there are so many open tables right now, and—

Oh god. We’re in the back room: my siblings and I… and Harry. Aggie had recognized Harry when he walked in, and now, now she’s doing what she can to keep everyone out of the back room so that they won’t bother us, so they won’t bother Harry.

A rush of gratitude for the older woman comes over me, and I clear my throat before I come around the corner and immediately meet Aggie’s eye. We have an unspoken conversation, where I thank her for giving us a small slice of privacy (especially when we have no right to ask for such privacy, because we’re in public) and she acknowledges that I know what she’s done.

“What can I get for you?” Aggie meets me at the end of the bar with one hand on her hip and the other holding herself up on the bar.

“I was just wondering if I could get something small to eat.” I pull on my earring, feeling slightly self-conscious about the fact that I’m currently attempting to hide a crown prince in the back room of my family’s favorite pub.

“Salad okay?” Aggie asks, already moving towards the kitchen door. “Hey Ron, bring me a starter salad with…?” She looks back at me with a questioning look on her face.

I shrug. “French?”

“With French dressing,” She allows the door to shut behind her before she moves back towards the cash till to cash someone out.

I lean up against the bar and resign myself to a wait. I don’t have to wait long, though, because a heavy hand comes down on my shoulder and nearly frightens me half to death. I whirl around, my heart in my throat and then relax once I see that it’s one of Tad’s friends.

“Bryn Matthews back in town?” Carl Adams takes a long pull off of his draft. “That can only mean one thing: Aerona had the baby.”

“Did she?” Carl’s wife, Patrice, appears at his elbow. “Did Aerona have the baby?”

I nod, smiling happily as I think about my newest sibling. “Yeah, she did, late last night actually. It’s another girl.”

“Poor Jack,” Carl guffaws and wheels back so that he can be within earshot of the table where a group of their friends are all sitting. “It’s another girl for Matthews.”

The groan that goes around the room is punctuated with Carl holding out his hand expectantly, and several people placing cash in his palm. I’m not quite sure how I feel about my newest sibling being the subject of a bet at the pub, but I know that it’s something that happens more often than one would think.

Patrice is pulling on my sleeve in an attempt to get my attention once again. “Does Baby Matthews have a name yet?”

“Teagan Rae,” I reply, my gaze dropping back down to Patrice.

She sighs and then shakes her head. “Aerona and those Welsh names… we were hoping that she’d surprise us all with the name this time around, especially as its probably the last one.”

I don’t have any time to take offense or disgust at her words. I mean, who honestly wants to think about their parents having sex, and having sex often enough in which to produce another sibling? Secondly, who’s business is it anyway what Mum decides to name her kid? It’s her kid, not theirs!

“Here’s your salad, Bryn.” Ron puts the bowl down on the bar, and then moves back into the kitchen.

I reach for my food, and then smile at Patrice, grateful for an excuse to leave. “Never say never, I guess. Excuse me,” I brush past her and then hurry around the corner, as if I’d be able to outrun this conversation and any subsequent emotional scarring that’s been inflicted upon me in the last thirty seconds.

As I duck back into the dining room, I find that Owi has moved on to Harry’s lap and they’re both playing an enthusiastic round of tic-tac-toe. Griffith has seemingly abandoned his mobile for the time being, because he’s joined the rest of the group at the table. Cadi is coloring quietly, though she does keep sneaking long sideways glances at Harry and Owi.

Harry looks up as I set my food down on the table. He raises an eyebrow once he realizes what I’m eating. “I thought you were going for something deep fried that I could eat, too.”

“Would you rather I have gotten the fried calamari?” I ask, taking my seat and reaching for a fork.

Harry rolls his eyes. “I would have settled for nachos.”

“Cheater,” I gasp, before I take a big bite and then I speak through a mouthful of lettuce. “That’s not even deep fried. How disappointing.”

“I have never been more turned on than I am right now watching you attack that plate full of greens,” Harry snickers, not even lifting his gaze from where he makes a blue circle in the bottom left corner of the board.

“I have to get my vegetables in somehow,” I do have the decency to swallow my food before I continue speaking. “Admit it, you think I’m crazy sexy right now,” I scrape the fork against my teeth as I take another bite, and then secretly hope that I don’t have any food stuck in my teeth.

Harry does lift his gaze up at this, and I nearly choke on my food as he slowly, slowly drags his gaze all the way up my body before he settles on my flushed face. And judging by the sly grin on his face, he knows exactly what he’s doing to me. “I can’t say that I disagree.”

I don’t really have much of a reply for that, so I stab some more lettuce with my fork and then stand up and lean forward so I can hold it up to Harry’s mouth. “Well it’s not fried mozzarella sticks or nachos, but I can still share.”

I’m having vivid flashbacks of us at Wimbledon, sharing strawberries and cream, and I find myself wishing that my siblings weren’t in the room so that I could attack Harry’s lips right now and also that we were back home in London in my flat.

Before either one of us can say anything (or really, Griff can make a comment about how gross the two of us are being), Aggie comes into the room with a tray of our food in her hands. Owi squeals excitedly, and then slips off of Harry’s lap before she clambers into her chair and claps as Aggie sets down her sausage, beans and chips.

While the arrival of food distracts the rest of my siblings, I start to turn back to the table so that I can help Aggie pass out the food. There’s a hot hand on my wrist and I turn to see that Harry is tugging me towards him while everyone else is busy, so that we’re as alone as we’re going to get in a room full of people.

Harry’s blue eyes are dark and his eyes are lingering on my lips before he drags his gaze up to meet my own. And when he speaks, his voice is low and raspy and I have to work hard to not let the physical tremor that races down my spine be noticeable for the rest of the room.

“Lucky for you,” He whispers in that husky voice that has me swallowing against the sudden lump in my throat. “I share well, too, and I intend to show you repeatedly just how well I share tonight when we’re alone.”

My hands are shaking as I reach for my drink, and I take a small sip before I look back at my boyfriend. “Is that a promise, or a threat?”

“It’s a little of both,” Harry murmurs, pressing a hot open kiss to my bare wrist just before he releases me and turns to Aggie, all flirtation completely gone as he takes the plate from her and sets it down in front of Cadi. “This all looks so delicious, Aggie.”

Before I can let myself get distracted by the fact that he’s seemingly able to turn it on and off at will, I sink down into my chair and have to actively work to repress the sigh that wells up in my throat. And then secretly hope that it’s a promise that he intends to keep.