In 102 Languages I Love You

"So what are the affects to Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis? That's such a hard word to say" he laughed.

"Your motor neurons don't work well. As in, you can't move much, you're not too strong with anything you do. Because of that, my muscles aren't sturdy, and I don't use them much in my life so they atrophy. Soon enough, I won't be able to speak much on my own. I don't twitch much as I used to though. I won't be able to walk or do anything really by myself. I won't eat much either. And then, well the muscle used in my lungs, they'll atrophy too, leaving me incapable of breathing on my own.."

He scrunched up his nose as he took a sip of his water. "Do they know how long you have, until, you know...?"

I shook my head and shrugged at the same time. "Actually, I went to the doctor three days ago and they said something was weird about the case of my ASL. They said I was living longer then I should be living, so they don't really know, you?"

He blinked a couple of times. "I have three months to go. One more month left probably before I spent the last two months waiting to die in the hospital bed in pain."

I nodded. Around him I wasn't afraid to die. Around him, I was okay with dying. Around him, I never felt sad about actually dying. Nothing felt any different, I felt normal. It was as if dying was just casual talk, and technically death was just normal to both of us. To other people, it was awkward and sad.

"Do you think people will miss us? You have more friends then me. Everyone thinks you're normal, just zombie looking. Do you think anyone will question your absence?"

He shrugged. "I wanted to continue a normal life ya know? My parents thought it was best if I just spent my remaining months living at home, with them doing nothing. I didn't want people knowing I was going to die. I wanted to live the rest of my days knowing I could still be normal. I know your case is different."

"My mom just wanted to protect me.." I mumbled.

He nodded. "I think if you were her, you would've done the same thing Maddy."

"I would've." I answered honestly.

He got up and scooted closer to me. "You're so small!" He smiled.

"You're too tall!" I shot back smiling.

He stuck his tongue out at me before poking my nose. "How'd you figure out I had leukemia? Is it really that obvious?"

"Well, I know how to tell if someone has it, you know the symptoms. Since I was home schooled I had a lot of free time. Most of the time I'd spent my time at the library researching about things. Once I decided to research incurable diseases, and leukemia was one of them, I read all about it."

"Good, the other stupid kids in our school won't know I have it then." He said. "Oh yeah, my mom gets home at five thirty by the way."

"I have to be home earlier then four, that's when mine gets home. And who knows, since she thinks I'm sick, she might be home even earlier."

"Do you want me to walk you home now then?" He said getting up from the couch we were both sitting on.

"Sounds good captain." I smiled.

We both headed for the door and made our walk towards the outside. He didn't live as far away as I thought he did in the first place. It was still frustrating having to look up at him to talk whenever he was beside me. The day was a bit foggy, and the air was moist. These couple of days had been getting a bit colder, signaling that October was coming.

"You know what sucks Maddy?"

"Hmm?"

I watched as he bit the inside of his cheek and his eyes scanned our surroundings. It was like he was almost afraid to say it, or maybe a bit embarrassed. "I don't know, I've always wanted someone to..someone to love, you know?"

A warm rush quickly overcame my body when those words left his lips. "You're telling me? I had never even been touched by a boy until.." I stopped myself remembering the day Frank had ran into me, the day he had held me in his arms.

"Until?"

"Uhh..it was one of the few times I could walk outside. I was walking and uhm, Frank Iero, he knocked into me. I went half unconscious half not. He just held me there on the sidewalk, his arms wrapped around my body. It felt weird.."

There was silence for about a minute before Drake said, "Oh Frank Iero, I know him. The short guy. Yeah...doesn't he have a girlfriend?

"Yeah.." I answered trying to sound cool and calm and like it didn't bother me or impact me in any way shape or form.

"So how about you? Any girl in your world?" I asked trying to smile.

He sighed and scrunched up his forehead. "Not like I can really like someone right? I'm going to be dead in about four months or less. But..yeah..I do." He mumbled.

"Do I know her?"

He shrugged nervously. "I don't know. You're new, and I don't know if you've spoken to her or even know how she looks like.."

Well fine, what's her name then?"

"Rory." He blurted.

My eyes bugled and a smile made its way across my face. "I know her. Well, I think, how many Rory's are in our grade?"

"One." He blushed.

"I know her then. She helped me in gym. She seems nice."

"She's amazing." He smiled blushing."And you?" He asked as we made our way up the stairs to my house.

"What about me?"

"You! Who do you have your eye on Ms. Darko?" He smiled.

"I don't date."

He snorted. "That doesn't mean you don't like anyone..."

"I'll see you tomorrow Drake." I smiled before hugging him and walking back inside towards my house.

He had a point.