In 102 Languages I Love You

Dan and I had been ignoring each other for two full days. He'd walk past me like I didn't exist, but that was nothing really new. The only new thing about it was this time I actually knew why he didn't like me so much. I didn't enforce any apologies or any type of generous act towards his part. I pretended like he didn't exist either. My brother had a problem, an emotional problem with his sister. I don't think he liked my mother or me to much to say the least. Mom knew something between us had heated up this time, but thankfully she didn't bother asking. Yesterday like I had predicted, she came earlier then usual to take care of me. I didn't let her do much for me since I was perfectly fine.

That's when the questions started flying around in my head. That's what kept me awake all night and why terrible bags under my eyes had formed when I woke up this morning. Would mom have to be by my side for the rest of my life? After a while, I won't be able to move much on my own. I'd lose my speech, any type of movement. I'd still be alive until I can't breathe on my own. But what happens when I'm just incapable of moving? Will she send me away to be taken care of?

No, we can't afford that.

My mom was what kept me going every day. I don't think she really knows how much she means to me. But what will really happen when I'm immobile? I washed the thought away quickly before I stared panicking. I felt my hands tremble as I was brushing my hair and realized I was in ready for a day of twitching. As I made my way down the stairs, the twitching took over the actual trembling and I got frustrated with myself when I tried to stop. Mom and Dan should have been gone by now.

I enjoyed a quick breakfast of lucky charms and an apple. Once I was done putting all my books in my backpack and brushed my teeth I took a quick glance at the clock, school started in twenty minutes. I dashed out the door ready for my walk. I had to try and avoid rides from Frank. Not only because I know something inside me attracted me to him, but because I was just building up my hopes for nothing. He had a nice girlfriend, he had good friends, and he seemed like a good guy, he didn't need me. Heck, I don't really think he cared too much about my existence. And, well I was going to end up dead anyway.

As I fiddled with my fingers to get them to stop jumping, a loud honk made me jump even more. Quickly the nerves in my body stiffened not knowing who had honked at me. I turned to face the car, blinded by the sunlight a bit. I squinted my eyes too see Mikey behind a car. Quickly a rush of calmness overcame by body as I walked towards his car.

"Hey Maddy," He smiled.

"Morning Mikey." I murmured lowly getting myself settled down in his car.

"So..uhm, how are you?" He asked as he started the car once again down the road. I looked up at him; his tone of voice was weird. It sounded like he was nervous, worried, or just sounding awkward. "I'm good.." I answered calmly like I always have around Mikey. He never made me feel to nervous or uncomfortable. I could safely say he was my 'friend.'

"I'm....why weren't you in school yesterday?"

I frowned. "You didn't answer my question!"

"You didn't answer mine either!"

"I asked you first!" I said raising my voice.

"Good, so why weren't you in school yesterday?"

"I was obviously sick. I was coughing a lot, and I thought it was best to stay home. Now I'm better.."

He took a quick glance at me before returning his gaze on to the road again. I wanted Winter to so badly sneak up on Autumn so it could be colder. I loved the snow. Better then the summer, for summer was just way to hot. I loved feeling my fingers go numb, or my cheeks get rosy from the cold. I loved watching my breathe freeze up in front of me. I looked up at Mikey, and when I thought my answer had satisfied him, he proved me wrong.

"Do you and Dan have some sort of problem with each other Maddy?"

"Yes." I squeaked. "He's an asshole." I smiled.

"I'm being serious Maddy.."

I felt my emotions boil and mix, different ones taking over others. "So Was I." I answered. His car was driving into the parking lot of the school.

"Fine, then answer me this! Why did you storm out on us like that in Marinara Monday? 'No, he's not my brother?' Is he...Is he doing something to you? Because Maddy..I mean I would never picture being that typ-"

He got cut off him the shrill of my bitchy laugh. I knew he was trying to help, but I couldn't help myself in getting annoyed with him trying to bud into my life with my brother. "Mikey, my brother and I just don't like each other. He can't stand me, okay? That's all. Don't worry about me; I can take care of myself." No I can'.t"Thanks for the ride.." I said getting out of his car, slamming the door shut, and walking inside the school. Quickly, students were flooding in and out of classrooms before the bell rang and signaled us to get ourselves to homeroom. I took the right books from my locker and headed my way towards homeroom. My eyes scanned each teen walking by and landed on Frank who was walking my way. He looked in thought and stared at his feet as he walked. When he looked up his eyes hit mine. I didn't look away, but his eyes went wide and he turned the other way quickly and dashed down the hallway opposite from me.

Did he just run away from me?
I shrugged the feeling off and walked into homeroom, taking my usual seat in the back. Expecting to be alone I grabbed a pen and began doodling on my notebook cover like always. Remember, I said expecting. Minutes later the seat beside me squeaked letting me know someone had sat there. I looked up to be greeted by Whitney's face. Her fake smile was making me nervous.

"Hey Madison.."

"Hi." I responded.

A short awkward silence followed my response, but I still felt her gaze burning through the side of my head. "Uhmm..Madison, do you have a boyfriend?"
I scrunched up my forehead in confusion and suddenly got curious. "No." I answered and turned back to my notebook.

"Oh..erm..do you like anyone?"

Possibly your pretty boyfriend.. Curiosity will probably kill me one day. "No.."
I watched her as she sat up with a smile. "Oh well in that case. Do you want a boyfriend, I mean I have some friends who might be.." I watched as her eyes scan me up and down.

"Interested," She said flashing me a fake smile once again.

"That's okay." I answered faking her a smile as well and turning back my attention to my notebook.

For the rest of the period I worked hard on reading and not dozing off. Whitney had moved herself towards the other side of the room with her friends. I couldn't help myself when my mind started drifting off to figure out why she had been asking me the random boy questions, and why Frank had completely walked the opposite way when he saw me. As I walked out of history her friends and her giggled as they walked passed me. Their laughs made my skin prickle. Second period I'd see Frank, I needed to ask him when I could drop off 'our kid' at his house since we were making this as if we were a divorced couple. I had kept Linda for three days already and he needed her back.

"Hey friend," Drake smiled as I sat down beside him in English. I smiled at his statement and pulled my books out.

"Everything okay?"

No. "Yeah, every thing's fine. Are we still going to the park today at four?"

He nodded smiling. "I haven't been there in ages."

I let out a small laugh. "I haven't been there, ever."

He opened his mouth to say something, but we were interrupted by the English teacher. "I hope you've all been reading your book. We will have a test on chapters 1 through 6 tomorrow, so be prepared with a pencil. Now look at the board and begin."

Journal Entry Number Five: Weekends. The teacher had turned around and was scribbling something on the board as my eyes roamed the classroom. No Frank Iero. I turned back to my journal to scribbled something down when movement by the door caught my attention. There stood the 5'5, dark haired, hazel eyed, cute boy known as Frank, late and trying to sneak in without the teacher noticing. Other students turned there attention to Frank walking in, smiling at him.

I couldn't help myself. I coughed loudly, fake coughed. And all hands turned my way and Frank froze dead in his tracks as the teacher turned around to us.

"Well..Mr. Iero, late are we?"
Frank's eyes were on me, staring in disbelief as he turned his small body towards Mrs. Savoy.

"Erm..I didn't hear the bell.." He smiled innocently.

She rolled her eyes. "Don't let it hap-"

"Happen again.. I know, promise"

He keeps promises he can't keep. Stay away from him Madison, stay away!
He walked back to his seat and a flame inside me burned in victory. For the rest of the period we sat doing work and discussing the book we had to be reading. The boy in my story was named Eli. The book was fairly thin, it looked like a fifth grader could be reading it, but the story behind it was too much for a kid to take it. Eli was the main character. He had been sent to a death camp with his family. Eli had been separated from his mother and younger sister Ztpora and stayed together with his dad. The last chapter I read was when Eli and his father were getting evacuated from his camp and leaving to Auschwitz.
The period like others went by quickly and I finished all my work. As we got up to leave for third, gym, I started thinking on an excuse I could use this time.

"Darko!" A voice from behind me called. I cringed from the voice and grabbed on to Drake's arm.

"Hmm?"

"Don't let him talk to me, I'm being serious, protect me!" I said out of breathe. He smiled as we walked out together and I heard Frank yell my last name again.

"Madison!"

My grip around Drakes arm tightened as my nails dug into his delicate pale skin. I could tell I was hurting him. Soon I felt a large hand slither its way around my bony wrist and turn me around.

"What the hell, let go!" I growled at Frank.

He narrowed his eyes at me. "I need to talk to you.."

I looked up at Drake. He had a good height advantage on little Frank. "Back off Frank, she doesn't want to talk.."

Frank looking bewildered. He let go of my hand and looked up at Drake. "I have next period with her, you don't. Maddy..I nee-"

"Frank!"

The hairs on my arms stood up as Frank froze and turned around to face Whitney about twenty feet away. He turned back to me quickly looking sick and then turned back around dashing towards her. I sighed of relief and turned back around grabbing onto Drakes arm again.

"That was weird.." Drake mumbled.

At that very moment I found an 'excuse' or a way to avoid gym.

"Hey Drake?"

"Yeah?"

"You wanna go to the park right now?" I smiled.