Speed Up Your Breathing

I spent the next day just doing my job and not really talking to anyone. I could tell the guys wanted to say or do something, but being guys, they just didn't know what to do.

When everyone was sitting in the lounge after the show I decided I would break the ice.

"Hey guys!" I chirped, almost too cheerful.

"Hmm, hey," they all said, visibly thinking I was either PSMing or nuts.

"Ok so, you might know some of this but here's how it goes: I was, until yesterday, engaged to Brendan Kelly. I have known him for longer than I can remember, and have dated him for most of that time. I was his band's tour manager and everything was going well until we got engaged, I got pregnant with his baby, lost the baby and then left to start a tour of American of my own." I took a deep breath. "And yesterday, I found out he was cheating on me with Bill's sister, and that she is three months pregnant."

There was this akward silence.

Sisky got up, walked towards me and said: "You know, if you need a hug I'm right here," with a half smile.

I laughed. "That's Adam, that's what I need," I said getting up and hugging him. As we hugged all four other boys got up and hugged me.

"Awwww group hug!" I laughed.

We then decided to watch a movie, Anchorman, cause guys like that kind of retarded movies, right?

William and I had a couch for ourselves and maybe I'm crazy but as the movie was going he kept on getting closer and closer to me. As much as I didn't think it was "appropriate", I did nothing against it. I kinda liked it? I mean... I hadn't seen Brendan in months before I learnt the amazing news yesterday... and I've been seeing William a lot.

I wasn't really paying attention to the movie, I was thinking about how disastrous mylove life was. I was slowly getting lost into my thought and falling asleep a bit.

Screw it! I closed the gap between me and William and softly layed my head on his shoulder. I looked up and he smiled at me, I smiled back and closed my eyes. I felt his fingers gently running through my hair and I fell asleep.

"Alex," William wispered while softly brushing my cheek wit his hand. "Wake up, it's time to go to bed, the movie ended and everyone went to bed."

"Hmmm, I'll just sleep here, ok?" I mumbled.

"You'll be better off in your bunk," he said.

"I'm fine hereee," I said not opening an eye.

"Ok, I'll carry you then," and before I could say anything, he picked me up from the couch and gently layed me down in my bunk.

"Goodnight Alexia, I'll see you tomorrow morning," he wispered, kissing my forehead gently.

"No... stay."

"What do you mean stay?"

"Stay with me tonight, I don't want to sleep alone," I said half sleeping, half awake, as I scooted over to let him lay down next to me.

He hesitated, then said: "Uh... hmm... okay,"

He got into the bunk and pulled the curtain, I cuddled up to him. He put his arms around me and said goodnight. I mumbled something back and two seconds later I was out.