Open Your Eyes

“Come on! Go!” Erin yelled excitedly, but her voice merely blended in with the rest of the energetic fans cheering on their home team. After her first official date with Bobby, he had asked her on a second one which then resulted in him offering to get tickets for herself and Jon for the next home game. As fate would have it, it just so happened to be against the Los Angeles Kings, Jon's favorite team and Anaheim's rivals.

“I've never seen you this fired up before.” Jon chuckled to himself as he sipped on the concession bought drink. Despite his prior comments towards Bobby's team and her dating the 'enemy', her hockey loving sibling soon altered his tune and happily accompanied her to the Honda Center. He was enjoying the sporting event but clearly not as much as Erin was with her loud cheering and yelling at the referee when she felt a call was unfair.

Erin tore her eyes away from the large ice rink before settling on her younger brother's smirking face. “What?” She asked, wondering why he was calling her out on her behavior when there were attendees who were far more vocal than she was.

Jon stifled a light chuckle before stealing a sip of his drink. Erin knew it was his weak attempt to hide the growing smirk on his lips. Erin's piercing blue eyes remained planted on Jon, hoping to stare him down to the point where he would let her enjoy the game in peace. Before she got a chance to do that, the loud buzzer sounded, signaling the end of the second period with the game tied two-two.

Jon reclined further into his seat, and stretched out his legs as some of the crowd cleared away. Some excusing themselves to the bathroom and others going for the final period concession run. Erin in turn pulled out her phone just as a meek beep sounded from it, signaling a text message.

“Is it number nine texting you from the locker-room?” Jon asked in a sing-song voice, chuckling to himself as he directed his attention to the young hockey players that had taken the ice during intermission.

“No, it's Lisa about wedding stuff. Bobby doesn't text during games.” She explained as she quickly typed a reply back, confirming their wedding planning date. Which consisted of Lisa's dress alteration appointment, choosing of the bridesmaid dress and taking a tour of the venue.

Before Jon could get another word in, his phone too went off. He placed his drink down on the floor before opening the text message, reading it with a frown etched upon his face. Erin attempted to peak at the name of the sender but the glare of the bright lights on his screen made it difficult to read the tiny text of the message.

“Who's that? Your girlfriend?” Erin joked and playfully jabbed him in the arm. Jon typed a brief reply before shaking his head at her before sliding the phone back into his hooded sweatshirt pocket. “Brian.” He answered simply, his eyes warily looked over to her as she was taken aback by his reply.

Her eyebrows raised as she regained her slightly faltered demeanor. She inhaled a short breath before casually asking “What did he want?” She gave off the air of not caring but inside she was eager to know the
reason of Brian's sudden contact with her brother. Last she had heard, Brian was keeping mostly to himself and shutting out anyone in his life before Jimmy's passing.

Jon shifted in his seat, visibly uncomfortable. Though Erin wasn't sure whether it was her line of questioning or the text message from her ex-boyfriend, making him feel that way. “He wanted to know if I had the number of a guy from school that I used to hang out with.”

Erin's brow knitted together as she frowned, confused as to why an almost thirty year old rock star was asking for a college students phone number. She opened her mouth to speak but no words seemed to form on her tongue. Her mouth simply hung open while her face held the confused look in place.

Jon immediately took note of the confused and slightly worried expression adorning her face. “I don't want to speculate.” He began cautiously, pausing a brief moment to clear his throat and think of the best way to tell Erin what he knew. “But I stopped hanging out with the guy because I found out he was selling drugs. I didn't want to be apart of it.”

“You think Brian is using drugs?” She blurted out as she back tracked through her mind. Desperately searching for any tell tale signs that Brian had been using during the handful of times she had seen him since returning. The only detail that came to mind were his eyes.

The once deep and alluring brown eyes of his were now significantly darker, with an equivalent fusion of anger and dysphoria. She had noticed the alteration in that feature of his the very moment she had seen him for the first time. However, she never recalled any signs of Brian being on any type of narcotics.

“What did he sell, Jon?” Erin turned in her seat to look at her brother straight on, he bowed his head down as if suddenly realizing that opening his mouth turned out to be a mistake. “Jon.” She urged, her voice going an octave or two louder. Though with the loud music blaring through out the Honda Center she wasn't loud enough for people sitting around them to hear.

“I don't know for sure!” He defended, looking her directly in the eye so she knew he wasn't lying. “I heard merely prescription but I don't know for a fact so please don't say anything to anyone.”

Erin opened her mouth to speak but the loud buzzer to signify the beginning of the third and final period of play boomed through the arena. She slowly clamped her mouth shut as the arena announcer introduced the players to the ice once more and the crowd around her cheered loudly.

For the remainder of the game Erin sat in a overwhelmingly stunned state. Even when Bobby doubled deked his way towards the Kings goalie and banked the puck in the top corner, her mind continued reeling at the thought of Brian using drugs. Whether it was prescription or something else didn't matter, but the fact that he was also drinking far too much made her worry that a deadly mixture was soon to be on the horizon.

Jon had to pull at her arm when the final buzzer sounded and the crowd began clearing their way out of the Honda Center. Her mind was still elsewhere but she managed to make it up the stairs and into the concession area unscathed with Jon close behind her. Before the game, and before being blindsided by her brother, Bobby had told her to wait in the season ticket holders section and he would meet up with them after the game. Bobby had met Jon briefly before he was expected on the ice for the pre-game warm up. However, the California native insisted that the three of them go out to eat after despite the fact that was it nine-thirty at night.

The crowd, at least the ones adorned in the home teams jersey, were happily exiting the building with loud cheers and ecstatic smiles. All thanks to Bobby's third period goal which led to the Anaheim Ducks victory against their California rivals.

Erin, however, felt like the odd one out because despite being dolled up in her Ducks shirt, her mood had taken a somewhat somber turn due to Jon's comment. She rested her now timid body against the closest wall and let her lungs release a large breath of air that she hadn't realized she had been holding. She silently watched as the attendees filed out until the hallway was nothing more than a ghost town.

Before she had a chance to even think about Brian and what her plan of attack would be, Bobby appeared out of no where. Looking freshly showered with flushed skin and the dark blonde hair of his looked almost brown due to the dampness of it. Despite having showered and being dressed in fresh clothes, with his hockey bag slung over his shoulder the not so sweet smell of sweat still lingered.

He cracked a half smile the moment he spotted her, not that it was hard. Her and Jon were the only ones still left if you didn't count the various Honda Center employees cleaning up the place. “Enjoy the game?” He smirked as he stopped in front of the siblings.

“Of course.” Erin flashed a smile and nodded her head before leaning towards him and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. The tempting scent of his body wash lingered on his warm skin but Erin pulled away before she got ahead of herself.

“Despite watching my team lose and as tough as this is to say...” Jon began, causing both Erin and Bobby to glance over at him. Erin couldn't help but notice how he looked to be in pain while also disappointed with the outcome of the game. “You guys earned that W. Good game.” He exhaled a large breath, acting as if that had been the hardest thing he'd ever said.

“Thanks man.” Bobby draped a casual arm around Jon's shoulders. “If you're anything like me, I know how hard that is to say.” Bobby chuckled as Jon nodded, agreeing with the statement. “So what do you say I buy you something to eat to ease the pain a little.”

“I will gladly accept, anything that prevents me from eating campus cafeteria food.” Jon groaned holding his stomach and making dramatic gagging noises.

With a content smile on her lips, Erin followed closely behind Bobby and Jon as they headed towards the exit. Letting her mind, for the time being, enjoy the simple yet worry free moment between the three of them. The last thing she wanted to do was worry about someone who had made it crystal clear that he didn't want her help.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“What are we doing tonight?”

Brian looked away from his television to catch sight of a half dressed Kelsey sauntering into the room with a glass of clear liquid. He had a sneaking suspicion that her choice of drink wasn’t water. He could hear the clinking of the ice against the glass cup as she moved closer to him, a slight pout on her lips.

He shrugged his shoulders before she took the seat next to him with an unexpected amount of force behind it. The liquid rose slightly out of the cup and she wound up with clear liquid running down her hand. Without a second thought she ran her tongue along the pathway of the what he could safely assume was either vodka or gin, not leaving a single drop to waste.

The relieved expression that spread across her face as she ingested the powerful drink was slightly unnerving. He couldn't help but wonder if he held the same expression when he decided that his only escape was the mind altering liquid.

"I was thinking about staying in. Not really in the mood to go out." He replied in a unmistakably monotone voice. Ever since talking with Erin at Matt's place, Brian had been feeling less motivated to go out. That's not to say his drinking lessened any, he still pounded it back should he feel like it, but the idea of going out to do it hadn't interested him as of late.

Kelsey's brows furrowed together before she took a timid sip of the smooth alcohol. "What's up with you?" She asked with a hint of an attitude. If Brian didn't know any better he'd think Kelsey was growing annoyed with his stay-at-home attitude.

"Nothing." He said before reaching for her glass, feeling the sudden urge to dull the headache that was sure to come if she continued questioning him about his behavior. Kelsey narrowed her eyes at him before easing her grip on the glass and let him bring it to his lips and feeling the immediate relaxation wash over him.

As he relished in the sensation, he felt Kelsey's finger tips lightly graze their way from his knee, upwards heading towards his more sensitive areas. “I think you just need a little pick me up.” She whispered seductively, purposely putting more pressure under her touch as she got higher then attempted to straddle his lap. “I can help with that.”

Before she had a chance to make herself comfortable, Brian covered her hand with his and promptly pushed hers away. He caught the puzzled yet slightly offended look on her face but ignored it and continued to direct his attention to the television.

“I don't want to fuck right now, okay?” Brian told her, though he was fairly sure his actions had already made her well aware of that fact. “I need something to make this fucking pain stop, what happened to those pills you promised me?” He asked somewhat on edge. Brian had been pill free for three days. Three days dealing with the daily annoyances that life brought with it, and the grief that he had yet to deal with. The emotions inside were wearing him thin.

“I told you my brother got busted.” She huffed with a roll of her eyes, acting as if he should know that fact. The basis of their relationship didn't exactly revolve around communication. “You're a fucking rock star, I'm sure it's not hard for you to find a connection.” Kelsey cast him a pointed look before going back to playing with the frayed ends of her bleach blonde hair.

He responded with a sarcastic yet still cocky smirk, the one that helped him on stage many times. “I might not be a rock star much longer.” Brian retorted as he reclined himself further into the couch. His eyes set on the thin blonde next to him, watching as she promptly froze at his words then slowly brought her eyes up to meet his. “I'm thinking about leaving the band.”

“What?” She muttered before her lips transformed into a tight lipped scowl.

“I'm thinking about leaving the band.” Brian repeated, this time bringing his heavily tattooed arms up to cross them over his chest.

“So you're just going to turn into some has been?” Kelsey spat, her eyes narrowing at him in disgust. He was slightly taken aback by her less than amused reaction.

Brian knew that they weren't together because they cared about one another or because there was some intense connection. It was merely due to the fact that one warm body was needing another and the sex was good. He figured the likelihood of leaving the band wouldn't interfere with that. Judging by her reaction... he was very, very wrong.

“I don't fuck has been's.” Kelsey sneered at him. She didn't hide the look of disgust on her face as she abruptly got to her feet and began collecting her belongings scattered through out the room. Each time she threw something in her bag, an irritated but feminine grunt would leave her throat.

The idea of leaving the band that he had been dedicated to for over ten years was a tough decision and definitely one that wouldn't be taken lightly. He needed someone there for him that would be supportive of whichever decision he felt was the right one, not someone who kicked him to curb when they disagreed with his choice.

“Don't let the door you hit in the ass on the way out.” He called after she had the front door opened. Via the the wall to ceiling windows, Brian watched her retreating figure look back at him before she not so gently slammed the door behind her. He sat there with his head resting against the back of the couch until he heard the rumble of the engine from her small Honda and the rubber of the tires against the pavement as she peeled violently out of his drive way.

“I need a drink.” Brian mumbled to himself as he exhaled a large, but not so relaxing, breath. It didn't take him long to realize that Kelsey had downed the last bit of alcohol he had in the house. With a frustrated sigh, he grabbed his leather jacket and keys before heading towards the closest liquor store.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“I can walk from here, it's less than a block.” Erin insisted later that night as she stepped out of the CVS pharmacy in Huntington Beach along the Pacific Coast Highway. She had needed to grab a few things and during her busy day of work then rushing home to get ready for the hockey game, time hadn't been on her side. After eating a decently late dinner, they had dropped Jon off at his dorm on the way back to her small town home. Instead of Bobby driving her the short distance to her front door, she was insisting to simply walk to her place of residence.

It was almost ten o'clock and darkness had fallen over an hour ago but she knew the neighborhood well enough to feel safe walking the less than a block distance to her house. Bobby, however, seemed to feel differently as his face held a somewhat hesitant expression.

“I just don't feel comfortable leaving you to walk on your own.” He reasoned with a soft smile, in an attempt to persuade her otherwise. “As safe as this neighborhood seems there’s always weirdos around when you least expect it.”

A light laugh escaped her lips as she leaned into his athletically built body. Erin placed a soft lingering kiss on his lips before she pulled away with a bright smile. “I have pepper spray in my bag.” She informed him as she held up the large black purse she had chosen that night. “I've had it since I moved here due to my grandmothers nagging. I haven't had to use it yet.”

She flashed a sweet smile to end her slightly convincing argument, using the same tactic as he had when trying to persuade her. Bobby exhaled a defeated breath as he began to give way to the beaming blonde. There was a still a part of him that felt uneasy about it, however, he had been told by not only her but also her younger sibling that she was stubborn.

“Call me as soon as you get home so I know you're okay.” He compromised with a shrug, she faintly nodded before pulling him into a light kiss.

“I promise. Great game.” Erin complimented once again as his cheeks flushed at the comment. She started towards her block, waving to him as he disappeared down a darkened side street.

The majority of her walk turned out as she expected. She passed one or two people who were letting their four legged companions out for one last walk before bed and one young couple who looked like they belonged in junior high and were out passed their bed time.

She was just hitting her row of townhouses when she heard the faint rustling of bushes, she deduced that it was either a cat or some other animal roaming around. But once she heard the sound of a bottle being broken amongst cement, her step quickened. Her eyes darted in the encompassing area, hoping that whomever was wandering about wouldn't be able to keep up with her.

She felt safer once she was inside the short iron fence that surrounded her town house. But just as she stopped to get her keys out of her bag, she heard the fence being opened once again. Her heart began thumping in her chest, and her mind racing with the potentially dangerous situation she had gotten herself into. Quickly, she slipped a finger through one of the key rings while also palming the pepper spray in her hand. She promptly turned around and applied pressure to the finger that lay on top of the trigger of the spray.

All Erin could hear was the light hissing sound of the aerosol can being used and the cries of pain from the person that had followed her onto her porch. Within a few seconds she realized who it was, as he backed away from the burning substance. She eased the pressure on the trigger so now only the sound of his agonizing cries could be heard in the dead of night.

“Brian?” Erin slipped the can back into her bag before taking a step towards his crumpled figure. Her eyes began to water slightly as she caught the last cloud of pepper spray still lingering in the air. She got as close as she could before the intensity got too much for her.

“Fuck! That fucking hurt!” He groaned with his fingers rubbing his eyes. Erin immediately reached out to pull his hands away from the affected area, knowing that it would only cause more damage than good. “What the fuck. Why did you do that?” Brian shouted angrily, some of his words slurring together in the process.

Erin's mouth dropped slightly, but still held his hands away from his eyes. “You crept up on me, that's why.” She told him stoutly before pulling on his hands in an attempt to wordlessly tell him to get up. It took him a minute, but eventually he stumbled to his feet while his hands were out of service. “Don't rub, it makes it worse.” The blonde stated firmly, waiting for him to nod before she let go.

The lead guitarist began to cough vigorously, which was another symptom. He released a hiss of pain before she unlocked the door and dragged him into the kitchen so she could help him wash away the defense spray. He staggeringly followed.

Once in the kitchen, Erin placed Brian at sink and turned the water on for him, while he rinsed his face with water and some mild soap like she told him. She dampened a dish towel and after he had finished at the sink she placed him in one of the dining chairs.

The cries of pain had seemed to diminish immensely after using the soap and water several times, however his skin held a very harsh redness around the eyes and she knew that for the next half an hour his sight would be blurry at best. She took the seat next to his and watched at his jaw remained clenched, most likely holding in any more groans of pain that he had left.

With a shake of her head, she extended her hand out to lightly touch the irritated areas of his face. He flinched at first but then began to lean into the coolness of the cloth against his burning skin.

“Better?” She asked softly, a trickle of guilt began pooling in the pit of her stomach. However, he should have known better than to sneak up on a woman without making himself known to her. She shifted her chair closer to ease her reach. As the chair loudly shifted, her jean clad legs lightly pressed into his. Despite the two layers of denim between them, Erin was momentarily reminded of the sheer intensity that his touch brought her and was immediately brought back to their time together. Instead of reliving the memories, she attempted to push the inappropriate mental images aside once she realized what she was doing and that she was no longer in a position to think of Brian like that.

Luckily for Erin, Brian was too busy easing his pain to notice her losing her cool for a second.

Brian moved the cloth away from his face. “Just peachy.” He muttered sarcastically before letting her dab around his eyes gently. As she hovered over him to inspect the damage she had done, she caught the familiar sweet scent of Jack Daniel's radiating off of the lead guitarist she was aiding.

“Have you been drinking?” She asked, backing away slightly to examine his behavior more thoroughly. He had been stumbling when she helped in the house but she chalked that up to his eyes feeling like they were being burned out of his skull. Now, she was wondering if that had been a sign of his inebriation.

He lazily threw his head back, telling her that if he could have, he would've rolled his eyes at her as well. “A little.” Brian answered before crossing his arms over his chest. His eyes fluttered open slightly, but just enough for her to catch his dilated pupils. Her mind began drifting back to what Jon had told her earlier.

“Why are you here, Brian?” She simply asked, opting to go for an easier topic rather than one that was better off discussing when he was sober.

“I was in the neighborhood.” He answered with a casual shrug, acting as if it were the most common thing in the world.

“How did you even know where I live?” Erin rattled off another question before moving one of his hands up to hold the cloth, letting herself stand up and wait for his answer. Only Zacky and Matt had her address and she was fairly positive neither of them had given it to him.

“I'm thinking about leaving the band.” He blurted out as she still had her back to him. Erin's eyebrows rose at his sudden and surprising comment, she almost couldn't believe that he had actually uttered those words. “I wanted to know what you think about that.”

Erin turned her body to face her guest, with her arms crossed protectively across her chest. She watched him for a moment, she felt like he wasn't being upfront about the real reason he found her place of residence. He peered up at her from half fallen eye lids, in large part due to him being assaulted by her pepper spray, but never breaking his stare.

“Honestly Brian,” The blonde tilted her head to the side, her wavy blonde hair hanging loosely down her right side. “why are you here?”

Without answering, Brian got to his feet and removed the cloth from his right eye. He took several half hazard steps towards her, and she in turn took some backwards. That is until the small of her back bumped into the edge of the island. Brian didn't stop until he was a mere half a foot away and the alluring scent of her over powered his corrupted senses. His hands came to rest on either side of her body, trapping her firmly in place.

“Because I'm fucking sorry.” Brian swallowed, his body language telling her that he wasn't saying it to get a rise out of her. It was truthful and honest, something he hadn't been since she had seen him again. She noticed that his eyes were glistening, not from tears, but from his body's reflex of washing away the pepper spray.

Erin opened her mouth to speak but the man standing before her, looking more vulnerable than she had ever seen him, had rendered her speechless. The fact that he was now looking her in the eye and apologizing had also caught her by surprise. Brian prided himself on being stubborn so to see him break down and acknowledge that he had done something wrong was a major step in the right direction. Erin felt her lips stretch into a faint half smile, casting her eyes to the floor in an attempted to hide it.

Almost immediately, Brian's hand came to rest under her chin and reconnected their piercing eye contact. “And I miss you.” He told her softly, almost convincing her that the handful of tears escaping his eyes were real.

Erin's mouth twitched ever so slightly, her smile slowly fading, only to be replaced by a vacuous expression. “Brian...” She breathed with an alarmingly dry mouth and accelerating heartbeat as he was putting her on the spot. Her bright blue eyes were locked with his deep brown ones as the pair were left in a static lull.

Her eyes softened when she was unable to answer him verbally, then cast them towards the red brick tile flooring. It only took him a second to realize what her body language meant. Brian cleared the lump that had begun forming in his throat the minute he revealed the truth to the blonde. He let one hand lose, giving her the option to put some distance between them if she felt the need to. In the midst of thinking of ways to rectify the situation, he failed to notice that she ignored that choice and remained pressed up against the island.

“I was stupid coming here.” He took an uneasy step backwards, bumping into the chair he had vacated only a few moments ago. The squeaking sound of the wooden leg scraping against the tile didn't stop him though.

He moved himself away until he was far enough from her to make his exit without second guessing it. Being that close to her only made him want to touch her and being in an inebriated mind frame would only tempt him that much more. He wasn't willing to take that chance, especially knowing that she was longer his.

Erin tilted her head to the side as she studied his slightly shaken behavior.

“I'm not feeling too good, I should go.” He mumbled before darting passed her and out the corridor which led into the living room and also the front door. She could hear the dangling of his keys as he removed them from his jacket pocket.

Instinct immediately took hold and Erin moved swiftly after him. Despite his unsteady footing, the intoxicated lead guitarist still moved faster than her. He only had the door open about an inch before she reached him and planted her body firmly against it until she heard it click. It didn't go unnoticed by either one that they were in the same position as they had been just minutes ago.

Brian's eyes which had been set on the black iron door knob, but now studied her delicate hand that was now resting on top of it before shifting to other parts of her body. Drunken, lustful thoughts were beginning to take over his mind.

Erin shifted uncomfortably under Brian's heated gaze before clearing her throat to drag him out of his surely sinful thoughts. To get his attention, she swiped the set of keys from his head. His red rimmed eyes widened at the sudden loss of contact between him and his ability to leave.

“You're not driving anywhere.” She stated as a matter of factually before gliding her fingers over the lock on her door. Securing both herself and Brian inside her home for the night. “You can sleep on the couch.” She motioned towards the large light brown couch that looked tantalizingly inviting to his tired muscles.

“I'll get you a blanket.” Erin offered before darting off down a dimly lit hallway. Brian took the opportunity to remove his leather jacket and situate himself on the plush piece of furniture. The moment his tired and aching body hit the cushions, his eyelids felt heavier than they ever had.

Erin was only gone a couple of minutes, gathering him a blanket, some aspirin with a bottle of water for the morning and a bucket in case any middle of the night accidents happened. A couple of minutes had proven to be too long as when she returned, she found a passed out rock star on her couch.

Silently she shut off the lights, the only stream of light now coming from the hallway she had been previously occupying. On her tiptoes, the blonde crept over to the sleeping guitarist and placed the necessary objects on the coffee table then proceeded to cover his sleeping form with a blanket.

With a small step back, she studied his face in the dim light that illuminated his angular and stunning features perfectly. It had been far too long since she had seen him like this, vulnerable and unable to hide himself from her. Erin was beginning to wonder if she would ever see that Brian again because despite not being able to vocalize it earlier... she missed him.