Get Tangled Up In Me

Would you be my thousand fucks?

Gerard’s POV

I stared confused as hell at Raven’s retreating figure. What the fuck did Billy push her over for? He was probably just messing around, I figured. Just a little to rough, that’s it. I slapped Mikey on the back of the head. Hard.

“What the fuck was that for?” He yelled turning to me. I scowled at him. He should know what that was for.

“You dumbass! Can’t you see? She’s obviously going through something.” I snarled before getting out of the car to follow her inside.

When I walked inside her house, my hand instinctively went to my nose. The whole house reeked of alcohol and the bottles proved my assumption. It didn’t help her case that her mother was passed out on the couch probably drowning in her own puke.

I slowly walked upstairs to silence. Jared’s door was cracked open and it was obvious he was sleeping, the snores were just part of the clue. I creaked past his door to turn to the room I spent more time in then my own once, to be greeted by the door. I knocked quietly, but was ignored.

“Raven, open your door!” I called quietly. I heard a muffled sob and something crash into the door. I was guessing it was a pillow, but who knows. I turned the knob, testing to see if the door was unlocked. The door easily opened and I stepped inside.

My heart broke in two when I looked over at her desk and saw her staring wide eyed at the razor in front of her. She didn’t notice me staring oddly at her. She choked out another sob and I realized she was holding them in.

I walked up to her and put my arms around her. At first she looked startled, but when she realized who it was she collapsed in my arms crying. While she was busy getting that out of her system she, I swiped the razor off her desk and into my pocket. Then I sat down on the chair pulling her into my lap and holding her tightly.

“Ssh Raven it’s ok. Don’t cry,” I soothed. She finally got calmed down and I waited until she was quiet to start on her. “Raven I know. I know your cutting. You need to stop.” She looked down at her lap ashamed.

“I- Gerard. I’m sorry,” She whispered finally finding her voice. She looked embarrassed almost. I bit my lip and slowly rolled her sleeve up while staring at her. She didn’t look at me, or her arm, she just stared at our shoes.

I gasped uncontrollably. Her beautiful arms were covered with scars and bruises. How could she do this to herself? The thought of the pain sickened me.

“Raven how could you do this to yourself? Did you ever think of how this would effect your friends, or Jared, your family? How could you cutt and hit yourself?” I felt my eyes tear up. “Do you know how much this makes me hurt? How much it makes me realize that I failed you. I wasn’t there for you when you needed me most. Raven you could have fucking killed yourself.”

“Rardy, I-.” She paused a tear sliding down her cheek. “The bruises, that wasn’t me.” She looked down at her feet again. I frowned, not believing her. She was just trying to make me feel better.

“Raven, just drop it. Come on I think we are going to take a personal day.” I said standing up and putting her on her bed. “Stay here.” She looked up at me with a confused look on her face and I smiled. She smiled back softly, wiping her cheeks for any trace of smeared eyeliner. I ran downstairs to tell Mikey to leave without me, then I called in sick to the school.

My Ravey needed me.