Have Faith in Me

It was close to an hour later when the five men finally got word of Jessica’s condition.

Jimmy was being his normal, off-the-wall self and had approached the front desk numerous times during the interval, throwing out threats of pressing charges and calling the police. Each instance, either Johnny or Brian managed to talk him down, but they knew it would be only a matter of time before security was called.

Matt hadn’t move from his chair, nor did he speak a word to the other men the whole time they waited. All he did was think about the conversation he had with his wife before she left, and how those words could have possibly been the last thing he’d ever get to say to her. He was deeply disturbed by his actions, now that he was in a clear mind and could fully functionalize just what exactly he’d done, and it almost made him sick to his stomach. How could he do such a thing? If something happened to her; if she didn’t make it; if their little boy didn’t make it; Matt knew for a fact that he’d never be able to forgive himself.

The doctor had walked out into the waiting room with a clipboard in hand, looking all business. His eyes wandered over the occupants, before finally speaking with a grievous tone.

“Jessica Sanders?”

Matt shot up from his chair, as did Jimmy, and the others followed.

“I’m her husband,” Matt said. “How is she? Is she okay?”

“Mrs. Sanders is resting,” The doctor, whose nametag revealed him to be Dr. Reynolds, the very same man Matt had talked to on the phone, spoke.

“And,” Jimmy urged impatiently. “Is she okay?”

“Well, we did some tests. Her body sustained a significant amount of trauma in the accident, but surprisingly, there was no internal damage, besides a few minor breaks in her wrist and ankle.”

“What about the baby? Is my son okay?” Matt questioned.

“The baby’s fine. I think it’s safe to say the fact that Mrs. Sanders was wearing a seatbelt was what ultimately saved her life.”

Everyone let out a sigh of relief, excluding Jimmy, who still saw a distinct lack of expression on the doctor’s face.

“So, what’s wrong, then? You’re not just going to stand there looking indifferent if Jessie is fine.”

Dr. Reynolds sighed and diverted his gaze away from the men in front of him. This automatically accelerated Matt’s heartbeat.

“Mrs. Sanders still hasn’t woken up. We aren’t worried too much about it, as it’s likely her body is still recovering from the shock of impact, but we are keeping a close eye. We’re hoping she wakes within the next twenty-four hours, but if not, more tests are going to be done to ensure she isn’t deteriorating.”

“Oh God.” Matt turned away from his friends in an effort to collect himself. Just hearing the word deteriorate set his mind on edge. “Can we see her? I need to see her.”

“Yes, you can. But I’m suggesting one at a time.”

Matt looked at Jimmy with pleading eyes. He knew he didn’t deserve to see Jessica after everything he’d caused, but he couldn’t help any of that now. The only thing he knew for sure was his wife was hurt, and he needed to be there for her; he needed to do something, anything, to make it better. Jimmy eyed him with something close to contempt, but simply nodded. Matt made a note to thank the drummer eternally later, when everything was back to normal.

He followed Dr. Reynolds through the swinging doors that led to the back where all the rooms were located. It was almost nauseating; the putrid smell of hospital, the blinding white walls, and knowing Jessica was stuck here for God knows how long. Matt wanted so badly to go back in time and change the outcome of that dreadful conversation. Maybe if he’d have just taken her in his arms and told her he loved her, she wouldn’t have ran off; wouldn’t have gotten into that car accident. Of course, though, he had to be stubborn and he had to let his anger get the best of him, just like always. If Jimmy wanted to kick his ass after this, Matt considered the possibility he might just let him.

“It’s just down here,” Dr. Reynolds said as they turned down a hallway littered with dozens of doors. Matt did his best to not glance in at the patients, even though it was almost instinctual. He didn’t want to see, as it would most likely further his worrying to an unfathomable extent. “Okay, here we are. I’ll let you go in by yourself, because I’m sure you’d like some alone time with your wife. I have more to inform you of, but I know you’re itching to see her, so I’ll come back.”

Matt nodded briefly, and still stood in the same place when Dr. Reynolds walked away. He closed his eyes tight and took a deep breath, before pushing open the door and entering. What he saw before him, would no doubt scar him for life. His wife; his beautiful, kind wife; lying there, unmoving, bandaged in afflicted areas, and looking positively agonizing. Matt exhaled shakily and quickly rushed in.

“Oh God,” He spoke, finally, taking one of her hands in his own. “I’m so sorry, Baby. I’m so sorry.”

He dropped to his knees beside the bed and wept. This was all his fault. Why did he have to treat her like that? Why could he just be a good husband? He wasn’t cut out for life, and she deserved so much better.

“Please be okay. Please…” Matt continued to babble. “Please don’t leave me, both of you.”

He rubbed over her slightly plumping stomach, feeling the hardened flesh underneath as their son formed. Matt had always wanted a little boy, ever since children first interested him. When he and Jessica found out their child was to be a boy, ecstatic couldn’t even rightly elucidate his feelings. They celebrated that night with their friends; went to dinner, drove down to the beach, and just simply let go. He remembered the smile gracing his wife’s features, how the wind angelically tossed her hair over one of her shoulders, and how the sunset made her skin glow alluringly. She was so happy to be pregnant with Matt’s child, so happy to be able to share that bond with him, and Matt was just the same. He recalled that night to be one of the times they got along, with no problems whatsoever, and wondered why in the hell things couldn’t be like that all the time.

“Why won’t she wake up?” Matt spoke forlornly to the nurse , whom just slipped into the room and was now inspecting the wires connected to Jessica’s body.

“I’m not sure. You should ask the doctor that question. Shall I get him for you?”

“Yes.” The doctor stated he had other information for Matt, and now was definitely the time to tell it.

The nurse exited the room quickly, and Matt turned his attention back to Jessica’s still body. Why wasn’t she waking up? If she wasn’t critically injured, why weren’t her beautiful eyes open? It was eating away at Matt and he needed to know more about what the deal was. He gripped his wife’s hand tighter and kissed her knuckles lightly. She had to be okay, she just had to. Nothing else mattered.

“Mr. Sanders,” A voice suddenly called from behind him. Matt turned swiftly and looked at the man entering.

“What’s wrong with her? You need to tell me why she isn’t waking up. There has to be some reason or something you left out before.” Matt moved to his feet as he addressed the doctor.

A heavy breath was taken in by Dr. Reynolds as he approached the couple, his eyes on the unconscious woman the whole time. “That’s what we’re unsure of.”

“Unsure? What’s that supposed to mean? You guys are doctors. You’re supposed to know what’s wrong with the people brought in here,” Matt snapped back. Was this guy even a real doctor?

“I know that, Mr. Sanders. Believe me, if her condition was clear, I and everyone else here would know all the facts. As it is, her condition is not clear. As far as I can tell, she’s just…sleeping; although, sleeping isn’t really the appropriate to use. She’s not in a coma, she doesn’t have any underlying injuries, and she doesn’t have any skull fractures or anything like that. Her brain is fully functional, but it seems as though she’s in some sort of deep sleep. I really don’t know how else to explain it.”

Matt was instantly worried. A normal, everyday sleep would result in awakening the moment one was disturbed. Jessica didn’t move or show any sort of response when he touched her, and she obviously didn’t show any to the doctor’s who tended to her. Nothing about this was fair, in the least bit.

“I-is this normal? Has it happened to anyone else?”

“I wouldn’t say it’s normal, but it has happened to some of our other patients. The majority of them awaken after a day or so, but on rare occasions, we’ve had instances where it can stretch weeks. If this is the case, we’ll keep her here as long as she needs. We’ll keep her comfortable and healthy, as well as the baby. You can trust us, Mr. Sanders.”

Matt only nodded, and turned his attention back to Jessica. He wanted to scream and cry. It wasn’t right. She didn’t deserve it, any of it, and all Matt could do was hope; hope she’d end up like the majority and wake up the next day. Any longer, and Matt was sure he’d go raving mad. Being without her now, in theory, was hard as it is; but to be separated from her for an extended amount of time, and on his own doing no less…Matt knew he couldn’t do it. She needed to wake up soon, for everyone’s sake, and for his own sanity.