Get Your Finger on the Trigger

Mikey’s POV
When I landed from the flight I stepped out into the boiling heat of Florida. The sun was shining brightly and boiling the tears that fell gently down my cheeks. I was alone. Leaving state had reminded me of that fact; I didn’t even have Ray of Frankie anymore, I’d left them behind. I thought back, remembering the night when my parents had thrown me out of the family. It was cold and the sky was pitch black and littered with stars. I walked down the sidewalk jumping in the puddles. My eighteen year old brother was home from univercity for a few days and I’d been really excited to see him. I was fourteen. I pushed open the doorway to my house and walked into the living room where my nother was making curious noises. I walked in to see her fucking the guy I recognised to be my music teacher. I let out a scared screach and picked up a vase from the nearby table, throwing it at the mans head. It shattered against his head, and blood leaked from his scalp. My mother was staring at me, shocked, as I screamed my head off. Gerard ran down the stairs and threw his arms around me, trying to hold me still and stop me from lashing out again. I screamed and struggled in his arms as my mother choked out the words that haunted my existance “Get him away Gerard. Just get him out our lives.” I’d broken down when she’d said that; and Gee had dragged me out to his car and driven off with me to another part of Jersey, where I’d lived up to this morning. I wiped more tears away as they fell and grabbed my bags and bass from the terminal. I threw them on my back and filled my hands with bags, then wandered out into the scorching heat of Florida. I slipped a pair of sunglassed up to cover my eyes and found the small house I’d rented without telling Ray. He thought I’d be a week; I figured I could end up being a couple of months…
The house I’d found was a lot prettier than expected. It was a semidetached house, painted bright yellow with a little garden full of flowers and a lovely cherrytree. The house was two bedrooms, one with an ensuite and little balcony overlooking the sea. I dumped my bags in the master bedroom and set about unpacking my things. I’d need to go shopping soon, I didn’t have enough clothes with me and the kitchen was empty of food. I’d always lived with my brother, never alone… My mobile buzzed in my pocket so I picked it up to find a very exitable Ray on the other end of the phone. Once I’d got past his exitableness I asked him how Gerard had been. Apparently he’d spoken. That made my heart drop and smash in my feet. He was actually better off without me around… I suppose they didn’t need me back at all. I grabbed my car keys and went out to shop and find a much needed job…
Gerard’s POV
When Ray and Frank had taken me home I was still pretty confused. My memories were fuzzy and I’d already forgotten things that had happened a mere half hour ago. I was sat drawing on my walls; I was drawing my brother Mikey… Words rippled in my throat and I started to sing them out loud.
“The the world is ugly,
But you're beautiful to me.
Are you thinking of me?
Like I'm thinking of you.

I would say I'm sorry
but I really need to go.

I just wanted you to know
That the world is ugly,
But you're beautiful to me.

Are you thinking of me?
Are you thinking of him?

You could say you're sorry
but I think you both should go
I just wanted you to know,

There's an aching in my heart
And there's a burden in my eyes.
I could get a new start
But I'd rather learn not try.
I could find a new place
Maybe no one knows my name
But I think it's just the thing.
Oh are you happy now
Now that you got
What you came for
Are you
Are you happy now
Now that you got
What you came for
Are you happy now?
Now that you got what you came for
Are you happy
Now!
Are you happy now?
Now that you got what you came for?”
I cried thinking about the lyrics. It would work pretty well as a duet between Mikey and me at the moment… I sat on my bed hugging a teddy he’d bought me for my 8th birthday. It was a bunny with a missing eye and its ear was falling off. It would be worthless to anyone else but it meant the world to me. It was my last true memory of my brother. He’d mixed in the wrong crowd when he’d started school, and I’d started to drift further into bad thoughs. By the time I was 12 I was self harming and doing drugs, while Mikey was 9 and bullying kids and becoming a jock. I was dissapointed of him. Then when he was 14, and I was just 18 he’d killed Mom’s new boyfriend. Mikey’d never been told Mom and Dad were on a break… We thought It’d blow over so wasn’t worth telling him. I cried thinking of my poor innocent brothers mistake, and how Mom had refused to call him his child. I clung to the teddy bear and stumbled up the stairs to find Frankie and RayRay to get a hug…