Get Your Finger on the Trigger

Gerard’s POV
“Gee… I’m gay.”
I stared at Frank, shocked at first, before blinking and the original shock faded. He was gay?... The guys who … abused me were gay; they have been or they wouldn't have done it. I backed away slowly and wide eyed. What if he was as mean as those men. I let out a scared cry and ran down to my bedroom in the basement and slammed the door shut. I could hear Frank running after me but I locked the door and hid under my duvet, falling into a flittering sleep.
*the next day**
I prised the sheets down from my face and sat up. My back was still quite sore and Ray had been talking about a doctors apointment to check it out. Last night came back in a blur and I realised how Frank wanted to hurt me now. He was gay. I wasn’t homophobic, I accepted gay’s but they’d only hurt me so far. Someone knocked on my bedroom door so I slid to my feet and unlocked it, opening it a crack to see Mikey. I let him in and relocked it. He led me back and sat me down on my bed, before riffelling through my closet. He pulled out a pair of slacks and a shirt before passing them to me and telling me to put them on which I did.
“So Frank said something happened between you two last night? Wanna tell me about it?” Mikey asked carefully. I sniffled and nodded. I liked Mikey… I could talk to him, and he was dating Alicia so its not like he’d hurt me in…that way. Mikey hugged me seeing I was upset. I sniffled to him about Frank being gay and how it scared me and he just sat and rocked me. “Is that why you’ll talk to me and no-one else? You know I have alicia so it doesn’t scare you that I might violate you like that?” He asked to which I nodded. He spoke up again. “Want me to come with you today to the GP?” He asked, so I nodded again. “Want Ray and Frank to come?” He enquired to which I violently shook my head and buried it into his shoulder. He sighed and said it was fine but they’d be worried. ] Mikey helped me to my feet and took me upstairs and explained to Ray and Frank he was gonna take me because I was a bit scared and brothers stick together at times like this. I could tell they knew it was nonsense but they pretended to agree and he took me into the car. I strapped myself in and we set off to the clinic. I chewed on my lip seeing as I didn’t like doctors but I knew I’d be okay. Mikey shoved on a CD which we danced to. I didn’t sing. I couldn’t sing. I needed emotion to sing and so far I could only talk to Mikey a little, and I could never show my emotions to anyone but him.