Get Your Finger on the Trigger

Frank’s POV
I slowly paced around the house; chewing on my fingernails and counting the minutes go by. Ray was sat down on the sofa in the living room, silent and drifting off into sleep. It’d got pretty late by now so we were both tired and just waiting for the Way brothers to return from the GP clinic. “Toro, wanna coffee?” I asked, to which he nodded and groaned, so I staggered into the kitchen, dizzy from lack of sleep, and pulled two large ceramic mugs out of the cupboard. I made up two strong black coffees and took them back into the living room, handing the larger of the two to Ray knowing he was tired. I sat down next to him, both of us sipping away at our strong coffees in silence; but with a mutual understanding of how we were feeling. I still didn’t understand why Gerard was so angry at me, and why Mikey had said he would go with Gerard and we shouldn’t. That had hurt a bit…
The doorway swung open and Mikey walked in with an arm around Gerard’s waist. Mikey was rubbing Gerard’s back with his free hand. What had happened at the doctors? Mikey took Gerard down into the basement so I hugged my knees against my chest and wrapped my arms around them. It took about half an hour before Mikey wandered back up the stairs to the hall and grabbed a coffee before sitting down with us. Ray smiled at him sympathetically, as if he empathised with him. I wish I’d been there to help; we all knew Gerard didn’t like doctors so it must have been a fight to get him into that room. Ray wrapped an arm around Mikey’s shoulders and we flicked on a movie to have a bit of background noise and a distraction.
“How was the doctor’s Mikes?” I asked gently, shooting him a hopefully comforting smile. He shrugged his shoulders at me and gazed at his knees.
“His backs fine, he’s got some antibiotics for the infection… But the doctor read about the fact he’s gone mute and got interested… He’s going to see Gerard twice a week – Wednesdays and Sundays – for therapy and help him start to talk again. They were communicating through drawings and simple phrases and sentences. When the doctor asked what Gerard was feeling he said anticipation, and when the doctor asked what he was anticipating, well it involved you Frank. So the doctor asked who you were I explained and he asked for you to come to the next session to see how it affects Gerard and how he acts around you. We’re not going to tell Gerard; you’re going to be in the room when we get in. Is that cool with you Frank, I mean I know that’s going to be hard… I can cancel it…” Mikey explained before he started to ramble, I chuckled at him as he got more nervous and trailed off his line of thought.
“That sounds cool Mikey don’t worry! I’d actually like to find out more about what’s wrong with it!” I smirked at him, and threw my arms around his lanky form. Mikey rattled off what would be happening at the appointment that the doctor had texted him to avoid worrying Gerard; blood tests, several brain examinations, ect. Poor Gerard… He’d never let me help him seeing as he was scared of the fact I was gay. He’d never been homophobic, I knew that. After all, we always kissed on stage. I guess he must just be freaked out, I mean he’d been gang raped by guys so it must just be like ‘well gays will hurt me’. It’s a fear not a judgement. I had to keep repeating that to myself, I didn’t want to forget it because I didn’t want to ever consider something that bad of Gerard. He wasn’t a bad person…He’d just had a pretty hard time.
I was so nervous for Wednesday; three days to go…