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You Can Run Away With Me Anytime You Want
World's Worst Boyfriend
After getting two hours of sleep, I woke up.
And the depression was worse.
So, so much worse.
My eyes opened, and all I saw was black for a few seconds. Then my sight cleared, but everything still had a black tinge to it.
All the venomous that hadn't haunted my fragile mind for the last few weeks reappeared, prominent and deathly. They clouded out my thoughts of Frank, of the fun we had, of the way he made me feel. They killed all that, replacing them with hate and despair and pain. All I could remember was life before Frank, the horrible, gut-wrenching feeling of being hated by everyone, of having to face another day alive, knowing that it was going to be filled with misery like the last.
Tears streamed down my face, cold and fast, wetting my cheeks. I couldn't sumon up the strength to move my arm and wipe my face. I was pyshically unable.
Mikey came in and told me I had to get up for school. All I told him was 'I can't' and he walked out. Those had been our code words when I was depressed, when couldn't go to school. He recognised them, asked me if I was OK, to which I replied 'I will be' and he closed my door quietly, like he always did.
No, this couldn't happen again, I couldn't let myself fall into this pattern again of letting depression take me over, of letting it become my life. I wouldn't.
But there was no way I could face school, face Frank, the perfect boyfriend, I couldn't face him seeing me like this, I was so inadequate it disgusted me.
Frank came round later. I heard the door open, and Frank ask Mikey if I was OK. Mikey told him that I was, and would he like to see me. Frank asked if Mikey was sure, would I want to see him, which was ridiculous; of course I wanted to see him. Mikey snorted and said that he was pretty sure i'd be OK with it. He said it would cheer me up. I heard Frank say thanks and walk upstairs.
Suddenly my stomach lurched, my palms started to sweat and my knees weakened.
Why was I nervous to see Frank?
Now I really was the world's worst boyfriend.
And the depression was worse.
So, so much worse.
My eyes opened, and all I saw was black for a few seconds. Then my sight cleared, but everything still had a black tinge to it.
All the venomous that hadn't haunted my fragile mind for the last few weeks reappeared, prominent and deathly. They clouded out my thoughts of Frank, of the fun we had, of the way he made me feel. They killed all that, replacing them with hate and despair and pain. All I could remember was life before Frank, the horrible, gut-wrenching feeling of being hated by everyone, of having to face another day alive, knowing that it was going to be filled with misery like the last.
Tears streamed down my face, cold and fast, wetting my cheeks. I couldn't sumon up the strength to move my arm and wipe my face. I was pyshically unable.
Mikey came in and told me I had to get up for school. All I told him was 'I can't' and he walked out. Those had been our code words when I was depressed, when couldn't go to school. He recognised them, asked me if I was OK, to which I replied 'I will be' and he closed my door quietly, like he always did.
No, this couldn't happen again, I couldn't let myself fall into this pattern again of letting depression take me over, of letting it become my life. I wouldn't.
But there was no way I could face school, face Frank, the perfect boyfriend, I couldn't face him seeing me like this, I was so inadequate it disgusted me.
Frank came round later. I heard the door open, and Frank ask Mikey if I was OK. Mikey told him that I was, and would he like to see me. Frank asked if Mikey was sure, would I want to see him, which was ridiculous; of course I wanted to see him. Mikey snorted and said that he was pretty sure i'd be OK with it. He said it would cheer me up. I heard Frank say thanks and walk upstairs.
Suddenly my stomach lurched, my palms started to sweat and my knees weakened.
Why was I nervous to see Frank?
Now I really was the world's worst boyfriend.
♠ ♠ ♠
Aww, poor Gee!!OK, so i have to say, thankyou so, SO much for reading, and commenting, and SUBBING!!! OMFG i have 18 subs!!! 18!!! thats amazing!!!!
I'm going through a really tought time right now and i really appreciate your awesome comments and your feedback. I've never showed my work to anyone before, NO-ONE and i'm so glad you like it and hopefully i brighten your day, cos you brighten mine!!
I love y'all SO much, i'll keep udating as soon as I can, school shit is ALWAYS in the way!!
I need your advice. I started writing a Frerard before this one (somehow that feels like cheating) and I was wondering if i should upload it? Let me know!
Lotsa love, MoNSTERMiNISTER