I Love You, but I Fear Love

A few weeks passed and Gerard was slowly recovering. His leg was broken and a couple ribs were still bruised, but he was getting there. The weird feeling in my stomach wouldn't go away and I was now jumpy every time a car passed by, afraid of Gerard getting hit again.

The band had to call off practices for a while, due to Gerard's state. No matter how many times he said he was okay to sing, no one believed him and he was stuck moping around. I helped out whenever I could, like if his mom needed help with the dishes, or if the trash needed to be taken out and the kitchen needed to be cleaned. In other words, I was keeping my mind busy.

It was about four weeks after the incident when I found myself in Gerard and Mikey's garage with the guys.

"So, can I actually practice today?" Gerard asked, getting excited. But his excitement left when Mikey shook his head.

"Gee, your ribs still aren't completely healed. Sorry." Gerard pouted and I put my arm around his waist, giving him a peck on the cheek.

"Don't worried, Gee, you'll be able to practice soon." He looked at me with sad eyes and sighed.

"Okay..." I smiled and kissed him quickly.

"So, what are we doing, then?" Ray asked, confused as to why we were in the garage in the first place if they weren't going to practice. I was actually wondering the same thing.

"I don't know." Mikey shrugged. I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Mikey, it was your idea to come in here in the first place!" Frankie whined. We are made sounds of agreement and Mikey held up his hands in surrender.

"Okay, okay, I honestly have no clue why I brought you guys in here. I was just bored and I wanted to have a day where we could just hang out and have fun." He looked at us and raised his eyebrow.

"So, what did you have in mind for fun?" Bob asked, crossing his arms. Mikey opened his mouth to reply, but shut it again when he realized that he didn't have an answer.

"We could play a game..." Frank said, grinning mischievously. Oh boy...

"And what game would that be, Frankie?" I asked hesitantly.

"Hm... I'd say spin the bottle, but you're the only girl here besides Mikey." We all laughed and Mikey punched his arm.

"Shut up, Frank. We all know that you're the girliest. I mean, come on. I hear girls call you adorable all the time, not hot or cute. All they see you as is a puppy." I giggled. Frankie was like a puppy in a way.

Frank blushed and crossed his arms as we laughed.

"Oh, guys, give him a break. It just means that they'll be fawning over him more than you guys because he's adorable." I shrugged. Gerard raised his brow at me and I kissed his cheek. "Except you, of course."

"Ha! In your faces!" Frank said triumphantly. They rolled their eyes but couldn't help but grin at his attitude.

"So, Frank, what were you thinking of for the games, again?" I asked, going back to the original subject.

"Oh! Okay, what about truth or dare? And no switching once you choose one! No chickening out, either!" I looked around and finally nodded.

"Alright, let's do it." I said and everyone else agreed. We pulled our chairs into a circle and looked at each other.

"Well, I'll start." Frank said with a smile. "So... Mikey, truth or dare?" We all looked at Mikey and he squirmed under the weight of our looks.

"D-dare." He finally said. Frankie twisted up his face in thought for a few seconds and suddenly, a sly smile spread across his face.

"Okay, I got it. But, I need some approval from Gerard first." I felt my eyes widen as I realized what he had in mind. Gerard had apparently figured it out, too, because he frowned.

"No." Was all he said. I had to agree; whatever Frank was planning had to do with Mikey and I doing something, and I didn't like that idea.

"Please?" Frank pouted. I shook my head and Gerard glared at him.

"I said no, Frank." Frankie pouted some more.

"I was just gonna dare Mikes to give her one little kiss..." Mikey's face turned bright red at the thought of kissing me and I couldn't help but giggle.

"Oh Gee, come on. Lighten up." Ray said, laughing at Mikey's red face, too.

"Yeah, Gee." Frank chimed in. "It's only one little kiss. It won't mean anything." Gerard finally sighed.

"Whatever. But only this once." I looked over at him, surprised.

"Well? Get on with it!" Frank said a little too enthusiastically. I rolled my eyes and shot him a glare, but leaned towards Mikey. He slowly leaned forward too, his cheeks still a bright red. Our lips touched for only about two seconds before we both pulled away. Mikey was still blushing fiercely and Gerard had his arms crossed and his jaw locked, whereas Frankie was looking way too happy.

"Alright, Mikes, you're turn!" Frankie said.

The rest of the time was spent with us giving each other stupid dares, like peeing on the front lawn where anyone could see or putting ice down our pants. No one tried anything with me since Mikey because of the look Gerard gave Frank afterwards.

I chose dare every time, unsure of what they would ask me had I said truth. I kept Gerard's hand intertwined with mine, reassuring him constantly that the kiss Mikey and I shared didn't mean anything. He finally let it go and went back to his happy self, which I was happy for.

I had to leave around five, so I said good bye to everyone except Frank, who I was taking home. I gave Gerard a kiss, Ray and Bob and hug, and I gave Mikey a quick hug, observing his slight feeling of awkwardness.

Frank and I got into my car and after putting on my seat belt, I punched him on the arm.

"Ow! What was that for?" He frowned and stuck out his bottom lip.

"That was for daring Mikey to kiss me. You knew Gee was going to get upset." I started the car and started driving to his house.

"Oh, come on. I was just trying to spice things up!" I rolled my eyes but couldn't stop the slight smile from creeping across my face. Oh, Frank.

I pulled up to his house and he gave me a quick hug.

"Bye, Ember!" He hurried inside and shut the door behind him. I chuckled softly and quickly drove home. I pulled into the driveway and got out. I went inside and hung up my coat.

"Hey, Sasha, I'm home." I called, walking up the stairs.

"Hi, Ember! Is Frank with you?" I sighed. I was starting to think that Sasha liked Frank more than she liked me.

"No, I dropped him off at his house."

"Oh, well tell him that he's welcome any time!"

"Sasha, Frank isn't my boyfriend, Gerard is." I said, sighing.

"I know, but I like Frank. He seems like a nice young man." I smiled, stifling a laugh.

"Alright, whatever. I'll be in my room." I went into my room and shut the door behind me. I laid down on my bed and looked at my phone. Brina hasn't texted me at all since that day last month when she asked me how I was doing. I sighed, a bit sad because of that.

I rolled over and quickly fell to sleep, still dressed. I was really tired for some reason, and I wanted to curl up and sleep.

I woke up to the sound of the door opening and Raymond jumping up onto my bed. I rolled over and smiled at him, ruffling his hair.

"Hey, puppy." I looked up to see who had opened the door and saw Matthew standing there, looking a bit awkward.

"Hey, Matthew." I said, sitting up. "What's up? You can come in." I motioned him inside and he walked in and sat on the opposite end of my bed.

"November? Can I talk to you?" He asked, looked at me.

"Sure, of course. What about?" I scooted a little closer.

"It's about me..." He looked down.

"What about you, Matthew?" I asked.

"November, what would you do if I was... gay?"