What If I Can't Forget You?

Mike and I laid on the bed for hours. We didn't speak, we just laid there in silence. We both knew that if we started talking, we would just continue fighting. And that wasn't what we wanted.
”Mike?” I asked quietly and stared at the ceiling.
”Yeah?”
”Do you like her? Be honest.”
”No, Sophie, I don't like her like that.” He told me.
”Then why did you ever had sex with her?” I asked and looked up at him. He was leaning against the wall with his hands crossed over his chest. He looked down at me.
”I don't know, maybe I liked her back then. But it was over a year ago,” He said.
”Oh...”
”I just... I don't see why you're jealous. I've told you that I don't want her, she's just a friend,” He mumbled.
”I'm just worried... And she's so pretty and all...” I muttered and looked down. Mike laughed quietly.
”Sophie... I think you're perfect for me.” I couldn't help but smile at his words.
”Can we just forget all this? I'm tired of fighting with you,” I said and sighed.
”Yeah, just try not to get all upset if I see her. I only want to be her friend,” Mike said.
”I can try...”
”That's all I'm asking, babe,” He said and leaned down to kiss me quickly.
”I love you Mikey,” I told him as he pulled away.
”I love you too, kid.”

The rest of the day went by as we laid in bed. We did eat, too. We went out to a restaurant and after that we went shopping. Mike told me he needed new clothes and we spent hours trying to find him new sunglasses and jeans.
”What's wrong with these?” I asked and held up a pair of black skinny jeans. Mike took a look at them.
”They're too skinny,” He said.
”What do you mean, too skinny? Have you seen your legs? Nothing's too skinny for 'em,” I said with a laugh. We kept walking through the store and finally he found a pair of jeans that he liked.

Shopping with Mike felt like shopping with a girl. He couldn't decide what he wanted and when he thought he liked something, a second later he realized he didn't.

We drove back home when it got late. We watched some movie for the rest of the night. I didn't like to watch movies, so I just watched my boyfriend. I realized that I was really lucky to have him.
”What are you doing? You've been staring at me for like, fifteen minutes,” Mike said suddenly. That pulled me out of my thoughts.
”I don't like movies,” I explained.
”I know, but why are you looking at me?” He asked with a laugh.
”Because you're so cool,” I said with a grin.
”You're creepy,” He mumbled and shook his head.
”No, I just like to watch you,” I told him.
”Seriously you're freaking me out, babe,” He said with a laugh.
”Oh, sorry,” I said and turned to look at the TV screen.
”Mikey?” I asked after a while and looked at him.
”Yeah?”
”What do you think is the next step for us?” I asked. He turned to look at me and cocked a brow.
”What do you mean, next step?”
”Well... You know, is something going to happen in the future? Are we going to get married, have a kid?” I explained. He was quiet for a moment.
”Do you want to get married? Have a kid?” He asked.
”I don't know... Maybe.” I really didn't know. We were both nearly 30, so maybe it was time to take that next step. But then again, our life was great like this. Did we need to get married? Would it really change anything?
”I just... I don't really see us getting married,” Mike told me honestly. I cocked a brow.
”Oh.”
”It's not that I wouldn't want to. I just can't picture us in that situation,” He explained.
”Oh, alright,” I didn't really know what to say. Mike didn't say straight that he didn't want to marry me, but I could tell he didn't.
”Sophie?”
”Yeah?”
”It doesn't mean I wouldn't love you or want to be with you, okay?” He said quietly.
”Yeah, okay.” I started at the TV blankly. Mike had rejected me. I couldn't blame him for not wanting to get married, but it didn't feel too good to hear him say those things.
”Soph? You all right?” Mike asked and leaned down to kiss my cheek.
”Mmhm.”
”You really do wanna get married, don't you?” He asked after a moment.
”I really don't know,” I mumbled, ”I just wasn't expecting to hear you say those things.”
”What things?”
”That you can't imagine us getting married,” I mumbled.
”Do you want me to explain you why?” He asked then.
”Please do so.”
”I'm not here so often, which means that you're alone. And I don't like it, when I have to leave you. And imagine us having a kid. The kid would have to live it's life without a dad,” He muttered and shook his head slowly.
”You're not away all the time,” I said.
”Yeah but I'm not always here either. And if I had a child, I would want to be in that kid's life every day.”
”Okay...”
”And when I'm on tour, I don't want to have anything to hold me back. You I can always take with me, but I can't take a child in to a tour bus,” He stated.