Taste of Youth

The next couple of days passed easily and it felt like I was reliving all of those years I lost in the home. I felt like a child again. Most of my time was spent with Remus hanging out and trying to keep the others from getting into too much trouble with Mrs.Potter, not that it worked very well. Sirius would come around every now and then, plopping himself down beside me like he had something to say but never got around to it. Peter and his mother stopped by on the third day of my time at the Potter house but left again after setting off a bunch of fireworks in the backyard with the boys. James had formed the habit of trying to get me to tell him something about Lily on a constant basis and tried more than once to convince me to set them up. I couldn’t stop laughing for a half hour at that one.

It was late at night now, the full moon high in the sky, and I was awake sitting next to the cellar door listening to the sounds of Remus’ howls. There was a scrapping sound where my back rested against the metal door and another mournful whimper came from the werewolf on the other side. I closed my eyes and pulled my knees closer to my chest fighting the urge to unlock the door and go to him. There was a rustle from down the darkened hall and I snapped out of my position wiping hurriedly at my wet face. Another whimper came and turned to a howl, something slamming against the door at my back. I jerked a bit and dropped my head to my hands shaking with the force of my tears.

There was a soft whine from my right and I lifted my head startled to find the same dog from the forest standing a few feet away gazing at me with morose gray eyes. The dog blurred as there was another slam and yowl and my tears started up again. He gave another whine and padded over to me nudging me softly with his nose. I swiveled, jerking a little as the next series of slams started, and wrapped my arms around the dog hugging him tightly dampening his fur with the salt water that poured from my eyes. After a while the rustling stopped inside the cellar and silence gave the dark hall a haunted feel. I released the dog and moved back settling against the door once more as I whipped at my face with the long sleeve of my shirt.

Remus had asked the boys and me to not come down tonight, a request that I ignored for my own sake more than his. If I hadn’t come I wouldn’t have been able to look him in the eye come morning and as the night was progressing I wasn’t so sure I could do it this way either. The dog settled his head in my lap staring at me and then turning to look at the door. I gazed at him for a long moment, all the sleek dark fur shining in the light that came from the small windows on each side of the hall, gray eyes that I could have sworn to seeing before. He was bigger than normal dogs with more muscle and body than I’d seen before. I moved down so I was resting belly down on the floor, cradling my head in my arms, staring at him carefully as things started to click in my head.

“So, which one are you?”

The dog turned his head to look away from the door and at me, an almost confused look passing through his eyes.

“When did you lot figure it out anyway?” I waved a hand at him, “That Remus was a werewolf and when did you find the time between all those pranks to figure out how to be an Animagus.”

The dog perked up immediately, clambering to his feet even as I gave an easy laugh.

“If it was supposed to be a secret, you’re bad at keeping it. Or else everyone in Hogwarts is rather slow. Don’t worry though, I’m good at keeping secrets.” I cringed when something hit the metal door again and I gazed at the shinning silver a terrible feeling settling in the pit of my stomach, “You lot did it for him, right? So that he wouldn’t be alone on nights like this one.”

“Second year.” I jumped at Sirius’ voice and looked up at him eyes wide, “We found out he was a werewolf second year.”

“Oh.”

“We started looking for ways to become an Animagus that year. Finally figured it out Christmas of fifth year.”

I nodded slowly pushing back up into a sitting position and staring at the brick wall across from me. I didn’t feel the need to force him to talk, to shake him and tell him that what he was doing was stupid and dangerous and utterly irresponsible. I wanted to only a little but the need to stand up and do it just wasn’t there, I couldn’t muster up enough will or courage to tell him what should have been said. Instead, I sat and stared at the wall. Instead, I listened to him, listened to all he wanted to say and all he could tell me. Sirius didn’t push me for responses, though he paused at the parts that a response could have and should have been given. Who was I to judge them, to tell them what was wrong and right when I myself had done so many things. So many things that weren’t right, that were very very wrong and never done for the right reasons.

The sun was coming up, the light of it peaking through the high windows at the ends of the slim hall. Sirius and I waited, I could feel our tension rising in the air, crackling unseen. The moment the first human groan came from the other side of the door, we were on our feet shoving away the bolt and forcing open the door. I slipped through the small space we’d managed to make in the door and raced to the lump of shadows in the far corner of the room. Remus groaned again, a weak pitiful sound, and I gently turned him over bandages in the small bag at my side leaping into my palm before he was facing the proper way.

“Hey,” I murmured, “looking a little raged there, champ. Have a rough night?”