Gone Isn't Forever

Chapter 7

What Do You See?

Why did Jimmy's wings lighten to a peppery gray shade? This was just one of the many questions swimming through the contours of my mind. That night I had been so overly riled up from the encounter with Avenged Sevenfold and all of the thoughts of how the hell it happened that I was restless. Jimmy, assuming that he could read me like a book because he always knew what I was thinking of, had only let me suffer from my own thoughts for a minimal time until he wrapped that invisible comfort around my soul and slumber consumed me instantly.

The next morning I slipped out unnoticed by my friends. But heaven forbid I leave without Jimmy. As soon as I exited the building and turned on my heel to initially take a head clearing walk, The Rev popped out of nowhere staring at me, his crystal blue disguise locked with my hazel eyes. He had his arms crossed and he stood not even a foot away from me. His expression was relaxed yet still stern. I had taken out my ipod, setting it to Paramore before leaving. I jumped and yipped out like an injured Chihuahua and my ipod went flying, eventually clattering to the ground. When I calmed down enough, I bent down to reclaim it glaring at him.

“What the hell are you trying to do, take me out because my heart can't handle it? I can see it now. How did the lead guitarist of Raising Babylon die? Oh she was scared shitless due to the deceased drummer of Avenged Sevenfold popping out in front of her!” I mouthed off to him. Him following me everywhere was sometimes nice. But today it was kind of annoying.

“Not my true intentions, no.” He answered and I brush past him, feeling the chill of his conflicting spirit on my skin. “And just where do you think you're going young lady?” He asked as I began to walk to the end of the driveway. I stopped mid step and I could feel the blood flooding into my cheeks, not because I was embarrassed, but because he had just royally pissed me off acting like he was responsible for my actions as if I were a child under my parents roof once more. I spun around and locked our gazes.

“Who the hell do you think you are, my father?” I spat at him, acid laced in my voice. Immediately I realized what I had just done when something in his eyes changed. They grew dim and fore the first time that sparkle that had always existed in them had vanished without a trace. I had definitely hit a tender spot.

“I'm not your father Melinda, just your guardian.” His voice sounded strained and it felt like a rock had just dropped in stomach. I felt horrible. Like, way to be a bitch to your guardian angel who has only ever been amazing and a blessing to you Melinda! I just needed to think before I spoke sometimes.

“Jimmy...” my voice seemed to echo in the desolate morning. He vanished just like the sparkle in his eyes had only moments ago. Damn. I had to fix this. But not knowing where to find an angel when something goes wrong, I just unpaused my ipod and embarked on my walk to my unknown destination. Finding The Rev's spirit wasn't like trying to find a ruined person at the local tavern attempting to drown all of their sorrows.

Paramore blasted in my ear and When it rains roared to life in my headphones. Moments passed and before I even realized it, I had walked all the way to the park where Jimmy had chased his first stallion duck. I giggled to myself recalling watching the videos countless times. I caught myself glancing around looking for his presence. As much as he had pissed my me off earlier, I missed him.

I sat down on a bench and leaned back, closing my eyes. I could feel rain droplets trickling down on my face. It was starting to rain. That was weird. It never rained in California. Not usually anyway. It had always been a place I had associated with hot sunny beaches, never a cloudy, rainy atmosphere. My eyes flashed open suddenly and I stared across the park horizon. I spotted a face peaking out of the side of a tree trunk that resembled Jimmy. “Oh good.” I thought. Now was my chance to apologize and make things right again. I jumped up and I had fled across the park within second.

“Hey, Jimmy I...Jimmy?” I glanced around the tree only to find exactly what was on the other side. An empty image of a trunk with no Sullivan behind it. Oh god. Had he really left me? This was the longest he had ever been gone. Now I felt like the clingy one. I jumped when I heard a ruthless chuckle in my ear. I spun around to only to find a familiar pair of piercing blue eyes staring into my soul.

“Jimmy, damn it! You scared the living hell out of me!” I scolded him as I shoved him. He returned it with another chuckle, this one softer than the last. “What?” I asked him, confusion catching the better of me. He chuckled again. “What?” I asked once again, my face flushing and butterflies invading my stomach. I hated butterflies. Always have always will be pure evil.

“You missed me...” He stated with a grin spread across his smug face.

“I...I uh...um-” My cheeks were stained an even darker shade of crimson. This was worse than when he intruded on my shower...

“You realize I was only gone for like...not even ten minutes.” I blushed even harder.

“Yeah...well...shut up.” I murmured sliding past him. He followed me of course.

“You actually thought I had left you already? Because trust me, you still have quite some time to spend with me yet. And you know, if you don't enjoy me always being around you, you could just tell me. You don't have to blow up at me like that...” He chattered as he stayed on my heel. I stopped abruptly and spun around to face him.

“Okay, okay! I did miss you because I'm used to you being with me. And I'm sorry I was such a bitch earlier. I just... I don't know. This is hard for me...” I replied. I really didn't understand my feelings lately. Part of me was happy that Jimmy had chosen me. And the another part of me was aching because I knew it wasn't going to last forever. If I missed him while he was gone for only a single ten minute stretch, then I was going to have problems when his mission on earth was accomplished. I know it was kind of selfish of me, but I didn't want him to leave me. I felt powerless. I suppose I got upset when he was always around me because I was afraid to get too attached. What was I going to do when he moved on? I felt like such a freak.

“I know. And you don't have to worry about me leaving you for a while. So cheer up and enjoy your time with me now.” He presented me with a sweet genuine smile as he took my hand in his. He drew it up close to his lips. When I felt the warmness of his lips on the back of my hand, my whole body relaxed and those stupid butterflies came back. Damn butterflies! “I know I will.” He added after releasing my hand. If there was anyone around the in the park, they probably thought I was crazy, talking to myself and flailing my hand out like a lune. I giggled at the thought.

Suddenly my phone vibrated telling me that I had received a text. I checked the screen to examine the sender and lifted an eyebrow in confusion when the phone number was foreign to me. I looked at Jimmy and he rolled his eyes at me. “Just read it.” He said. I obeyed Mr. Sullivan and opened the text message. It read:

Yo Nevaeh Flow. It's Syn from A7X. Just wanted to
let ya know we're meeting at Long Beach today at
noon for the tour.
Got a couple things for you guys to sign.
Hope to see RB there!! ;D

-Syn Gates

Holy shiznits! Brain Haner Jr. just texted my phone! I squealed out loud and Jimmy laughed and he shook his head at me in disgrace. But I didn't care. Because Synyster fucking Gates just texted my phone! I had a right to geek out alright.

“Well lets get a move on, shall we? Its getting close to 11.” He said turning me around so that he was behind me and guiding my way.

“Okay, okay Jimmy. Johnny Christ, I'm going!” I said. I could tell Jimmy rolled his eyes at me again.

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We arrived at Long Beach by 11:30 a.m. And we weren't exactly sure what to expect and we didn't really know what we were looking for either. When I had told the girls the news, they cried with happy. We pulled into the parking lot of Long beach which was dusted and coded with sand. Jo spotted the Avenged Sevenfold tour bus. We all let out a squeal and then agreed not to do that around them again. Although I had a feeling one of our inner fan girls was going to rear their ugly head.

We met up with the boys of Avenged. They greeted us as we jumped out of the our white creeper van. Shadows invited us onto their tour bus and I could tell we were all working hard to conceal our inner fan girls. It was just as I had always imagined it would be. A large living space and a kitchenette with a mini fridge entertained the structure of the bus. A long hallway with a decent bathroom, five bunks jetted out from the walls of the hallway and a mysterious master room remained at the end of the hall. The Berry's stood up to shake our hands and officially greet us. Jo hugged them both. It was just how I pictured it all of these years of dreaming to go on tour with our biggest inspiration. The only thing missing was...Jimmy. I could see still the the emptiness that his departing left in each of their eyes. It was the same look that was in all of our eyes that night that we went to see Jimmy's grave. I glanced around for Jimmy, wondering where he was.

I spotted him standing next to Brian with his left hand resting atop Brian's right shoulder. I smiled at him and he flashed a beautiful smile back at me. Brian was busy conversing with Kirsten to notice the exchange which was a good thing. Matt made his way over to me and handed me a few documents to sign in order to make the trial tour official. “We just need one of your signatures here,here, and your initials here. Then you guys will officially be our guest aboard the Avenged tour bus and our responsibility throughout the Monster Energy Drink tour. The trial based tour will last approximately 3 months and we will have one of the Berry's hook your van up to the equipment truck so you don't have to spend all of your time with us. We can get pretty boring on a lazy day.” I laughed at the thought of Avenged Sevenfold ever becoming boring to any of us. I signed the documents with the pen that Johnny had slid into my hand.

“Hey, shouldn't I read this first?” I asked. The boys of Avenged busted out in a fit of laughter, even Jimmy. So I assumed I could definitely trust Jimmy and finished signing.

“Dear, it's just a statement telling the record label and the tour sponsors that Raising Babylon will be accompanying us on the tour. Nothing to be concerned with.” Zacky spoke to me for the first time this morning.

“Oh.” I chuckled at my own stupidity. I handed the signed papers back to M. Shadows. Brain had the Berrys aid us in lugging our bags onto the bus. I was suddenly confused when a very important question popped into my mind. Where the hell were we supposed to sleep? I glanced around to find Jimmy. I wasn't sure where he had gone while I was helping the Berrys bring our luggage in. I spotted him roaming around in the hallway with the five bunks jutting out. He was standing in front of one of the top bunks with both of his hands resting on top of the neatly made black bedding. A pair of drum sticks were placed on the pillow along with a single periwinkle flower,which means early friendship and the pleasures of memory. It was obviously a dedication in remembrance of Jimmy, and even he knew that. I made my way to Jimmy, next to the bunk he was standing by.

“They miss you, you know?” I said keeping my voice low. I put my hand on his shoulder for a source of comfort. To my surprise I caught a drop moisture fall upon the fabric of the bunk spread. Was Jimmy actually producing tears? I looked up at him to confirm my theory and it was true. I didn't know Jimmy was capable of tears in this state of matter. “Jimmy?”

“I...I never meant hurt them.” He whispered. I was stumped. I was completely at a loss for words. So instead I just hugged his tall, cold frame.

“They know you didn't.” Was all I could muster up. Jimmy hugged me back until Johnny entered the bunk area. I let my arms fall, allowing them to slide down Jimmy's torso. Jimmy let go of me as well upon seeing Johnny's approach.

“Hey. Taking a gander at Jimmy's bunk are we?” Johnny Christ questioned walking up next to Jimmy and I. Of course he could only see me. Jimmy fell silent. “We uh...keep a fresh flower and a pair of his drum sticks there as a tribute to the crazy son of bitch. I understand that you fancied our friend quite a bit?”

“I did. Still do.” I answered Johnny wondering where he found that piece of information out. “Where did you hear that from though?”

“Your singer.” Johnny gave me one those adorable crooked grins. That made everything make sense now.

“Of course.” I smiled and slightly rolled my eyes at Jo's open emotions.

“Well, in that case, anyone who still keeps The Rev alive in their heart is worthy of taking over his bunk for a couple of months. Congratulations Nevaeh Flow. Jimmy would have loved you.” Johnny informed me before turning on his heel and exiting the bunk area. It seemed as though the girls had brought their entire wardrobes and they needed more help than just the Berrys. The entire band was out there helping the girls bring in their stuff.

“Johnny?” I called for him before he left the bus.

“Yo?” He peeked back around.

“Where is Arin?” I asked him with curiosity.

“He's going to meet up with us later. He's got his own ride to the first concert. Ilejay only rides with us sometimes.” He explained. I didn't quite understand this logic, but I wasn't going to question Avenged Sevenfold.

“Johnny! Get your scrawny ass out here man!” I heard Matt's voice call from outside of the tour bus. I smiled at him.

“Better go before Matt smothers you with his muscles.” I warned. Johnny just threw his head back and let out a combustion of laughter as he exited the tour bus, knowing that I was just messing around, but was actually probably right.

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We had all boarded the Avenged tour bus and were on our way to Las Vegas, Nevada. I was slightly concerned as to what we would find in Sin City. But I just kind of brushed it away seeing as Raising Babylon was named after the City of Evil. With a band name like that, we could handle anything these tour towns could throw at us. Jo had avoided Zacky all day, not knowing how to apologize for the incident from our first encounter with the headlining band. So she and Maggy had been talking Matt's head off all day. Matt didn't seem to mind too much, seeing as Matt likes to talk too much anyway. Harper was working with Zacky to further her rhythm guitar playing, and Kirsten was sitting there laughing at Johnny and Brian battling it out on Black Ops. I however, had taken it upon myself to leave the sight of the giggling Kirsten, and Johnny and Brian battling for total domination. I had winked at Jo on my way into the bathroom to take a nice hot shower, that hopefully would not be disturbed this time, seeing her helping herself to a monster energy drink from the mini-fridge. I smiled and decided not to bother to tell her that since they belonged to Zacky, which I had asked about earlier in the day, it probably had been mixed with some type of alcohol. Most likely Jack. This was going to be an interesting tour.

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(Jimmy)

Although I have been getting to know Melinda Bliss over the past week or so, it still shocks me how long that girl can take a shower for. She had been in there for 45 minutes and Jo was getting buzzed to the point that I think she was almost drunk. No one had bothered to tell her that Zacky's monsters was mixed with quite a bit of Jack Daniels. Which I am pretty disappointed in Melinda for because I knew she knew! So naturally, that being her first drink ever, she couldn't quite take the alcohol as easily as my friends could. She was roaming the bus, a giant empty monster can in her hand. Oh no. This was going to be a disaster. I watched her approach from down the hall. She was walking like a tipsy individual, even knocking straight into me. She gazed up at me and a look of confusion crossed her expression.

“Hey, Sir your not supposed to be here. Your supposed to be in heaven. Are you drunk? Wait no...not drunk. I'm drunk.” She slurred just a bit. I could tell the alcohol had messed her up a bit, but she still held a small portion of her soberness. But my question was, how the hell was she able to see me now? I mean, the only one that could see me was Melinda. And now all of the sudden, Jo consumes alcohol and it allows her to see spirits like me? That's messed up. I don't give a fuck who you are.

“Uhh...” I bit my lip, not knowing how to respond or even if I should. Wasn't this against the rules or something? Some guardian angel code? Didn't one something like that exist?

“Don't worry Jimmy. It's okay. I love you man.” She said patting my stomach...or what would have been my stomach. I wasn't solid to her however. He hand went straight through me, just like you would see happen in a horror movie. She freaked out for a short minute. “AHH! Oh nooo! Where did you go?!”

“Heeey there Miss. Thirteen! Terribly sorry about the monster. But uh... Let's see what Vengeance can do to make it up to you beautiful.” Zacky approached us and he greeted Jo with a one of his signature Zacky V mannerisms. I suddenly froze and had I been alive, I probably would have held my breath. I was sincerely hoping that Zacky could not see me as well. This whole thing would have gone south if he had. But it was evident that the only one he saw at that moment was Jo Spencer. He had set his gaze locked with hers, his ever true green eyes consuming her beauty. It figures that Jo would be the exact type that Zack would go for.

“Umm...Yes. Yes Sir!” Jo seemed eager, as though she had waited her entire life for this moment.
She giggled when Zacky took the empty monster can and threw it on the ground over his shoulder. I watched as Zacky slid his tattoo covered arm around her waist and led her down the hall to the end of the designated room. Basically it was a place to do things in privacy. Whether that is working on music, discussing something in private, or fucking, or something that pertains to sex, that room was always the get away vacation area. So it doesn't take much imagination to figure out exactly how Zacky was planning on 'making it up to her'. I saw Melinda step out of the bathroom, hair soaking wet wearing a pair of electric blue nike basketball shorts, a loose fitting Falling in Reverse t-shirt, and a chain necklace with a single pair of finger cuffs hanging low around her neck. Interesting choice of jewelery. She had finished just in time to see Zacky closing the door to the mystery room after Jo had entered the chamber.