Priceless

~~~

Stephen and I sat on the Gomez’ roof, sharing a pint of Ben&Jerry’s and staring at the sky. I felt comforted spending time like this with him, and I wanted more of it to be honest.

We had been discussing his flight to New York for quite a while now, and surprisingly it wasn’t awkward talking about how Josh had helped him find out what hotel I was in through Erin, and also borrowed Erin’s How I Met Your Mother DVDs for us to watch.

“The mere idea of me flying to New York was his, actually,” he said, continuing with his story, “I mean, he just kind of said, ‘What’s the next thing you wanna do, fly all the way to New York just to see her?’ And I thought why not?”

I smiled and shook my head a little as I took a spoonful of our ice cream and shoved it onto my mouth. “It was really sweet of you. But really, really risky since I was with my mom,” I said, still not intending to tell him that she had seen us there. I didn’t want to make him feel bad, because I had a feeling that was gonna be the case if ever I tell him about it.

“Yes, but...I don’t know, it was probably selfish of me to do that, but it was worth it. I don’t regret anything.” He shrugged and shot me a meaningful smile.

“I don’t regret anything either,” I said in a low voice.

His smile grew for a moment and then he looked up at the sky. I stared at him, and couldn’t help but smile slowly as I thought of how amazing he truly was, and how lucky I was to spend time with him. A few words made their way to my thoughts and slowly I struggled if I should say it out loud or not, because if I did it would totally give this hangout a different meaning.

I tried to think it over first, but the words left my mouth even before I could decide. “I will break up with Alex on the 8th,” I blurted out. This caught his attention and he turned to me, his eyes a little wide. His mouth was also slightly agape, like what I’d set had really caught him off guard.

“I didn’t mean to schedule it, I just—well, I wanted to break it off with him right away but I wanted to do it personally, not just through a phone call. So I told him I’ll meet him on the 8th,” I explained further.

He didn’t say anything. He just stared at me, his expression still the same. I didn’t know what to say anymore, so I just bit my lip and looked down on the pint of ice cream that was slowly melting already.

I started regretting why I even said it. I mean, really, why now? This was a pure friends hangout and even if it wasn’t, Alex and I were technically still together, so Stephen and I should control ourselves and not get too close with each other.

“Are you...are you doing it for me?” he finally asked, and I looked up at him. His expression was still the same but he looked less-shocked now.

I nodded, “Yeah. But also because I don’t have feelings for him.”

A smile reached his lips upon hearing this. “And your feelings for me are what, exactly?”

I bit my lip. I really needed to stop blurting things out or else I would be in big trouble. I quickly thought of what to say. “Are not to be discussed right now,” I said.

He smirked, but said nothing more as he looked back to the sky. There was a few moments of silence before he spoke again, “We should probably get back.”

“Yeah, we should.”

We both stood up, with me holding the pint of ice cream, but he took it from me and motioned for me to go first. I made my way to the attic, and then carefully walked down the stairs. He was still going down the stairs so I took the time to look around his room. A particular framed picture on his bedside table caught my eye, and I looked closely at it. I laughed slightly upon realizing that it was a picture of the young Gomez brothers naked in a tub.

“What’re you laughing at? What—oh fuck!”

Suddenly he was hauling me away from the picture, but I acted fast and took it from the table. “You two are such cute kids,” I said, still laughing as he tried to take it from me unsuccessfully. “Can I have this picture? Please?”

“No! Give it to me,” he argued, still trying to take it as he now laughed as well. “Seriously, Bails, I hate you!”

I didn’t know how it happened but all of a sudden I fell on his bed, and he fell on top of me. I was still clutching the frame in my hand but for some reason, I stopped laughing. Maybe it was because his face was so dangerously close to mine already and I was starting to get nervous.

He stopped laughing as well, and I watched as his gaze travelled from my eyes, to my lips, then back to my eyes again. He swallowed hard and then spoke. “We, um, we better get back,” he managed to let out, his voice low.

“Yeah,” I agreed, then cleared my throat. “We should.”

But none of us moved. In my defense, I couldn’t since he was on top of me. Plus, I was kinda glued to where I was. That, and I was also lost in his stare.

The next moments happened so fast. I couldn’t stop myself from suddenly moving my head forward and claiming his lips. I really couldn’t, and the moment I kissed him, he kissed me back so there was really no use in pulling back. I mean, it wasn’t my fault that his kiss was intoxicating and that I immediately forgot about everything the moment our lips touched.

Our tongues started battling for dominance and his hand were pulling at the hem of my shirt, but I still didn’t recoil. I wanted it. I wanted him and he was special to me and he made me feel safe. I didn’t if it was the perfect time, but...but I was with the perfect guy, and it was the perfect moment, and maybe for once it was all that mattered.