She Puts The Ho In Home Wrecker

“So dad… where are we going?” Madison whined.

Knoxville grinned and stopped the car; “We’re here!!” he beamed.

“Yes… but where exactly is here” Rebel said looking out of the window and noticing a small windmill.

“Miniature golf!” Knoxville replied.

Ville looked at Madison and they both burst out laughing.

“What… there is nothing funny about miniature golf… in fact… I was gonna add summut about it in Jackass 2.5…” Knoxville said with a hurt expression on his face.

“Jackass… 2.5?” Rebel asked looking worried.

“Yes…” Knoxville replied laughing.

“Ohhh… crap…” Rebel said as she shook hear head.

“Well… what are we waiting for…? I wanna go play some golf…” Knoxville said as he got out of the car.

Rebel turned around in her seat so that she could look at Ville, “Angel’s gonna be okay isn’t she?”

“Course she is sweetheart…she’s stronger than she looks…” Ville said reassuringly.

Madison grinned at them both and hopped out of the car.

Later that day…

“Right… Madison… you watching honey… this is how you play golf the professional way…” Knoxville said as he picked up a golf club.

“Uhhh… Johnny… babe… since when have you been a professional golfer?” Rebel asked.

“Since… since… ummm… I just am…” Knoxville replied.

“This should be funny…” Ville said winking at Rebel.

Knoxville carried on instructing his daughter, “Right… first of all you need a good grip on the club… like this… then… you widen your stance like this… and then you wiggle your ass… like so... and… SWING!!” Knoxville swung at the ball and sent it flying. The ball hit the side of the windmill… bounced off it and was sent flying back towards Knoxville, “Ohhh shite…” Knoxville managed to say before the ball whacked him right in the head… Knoxville fell to the ground with a thud.

“Shit… Johnny… honey… you okay?” Rebel asked as she ran towards him.

“That… is how you don’t play golf…” Ville said to Madison.

“Johnny… Johnny… can you hear me?” Rebel asked as she knelt beside him.

Knoxville sat up, “I think… I think I’m slightly concussed…” he moaned clutching his head.

"You wanna go see a doctor?" Rebel asked as she hugged him.

"No..." Knoxville replied as he stood up, "I'm gonna own that windmill..."

"That can't be good..." Ville said.

"Uhhh... dad... I don’t think you should..." Madison started.

Knoxville strode up to the windmill and kicked it, "Your going down..." he said glaring at the windmill, and then he started to climb up it.

“Johnny… come on… get down… you’re going to get all of us kicked out…” Ville said as he walked over and looked up at Knoxville.

“No… I am not gonna let this stupid windmill get the better of me!!” Knoxville yelled down to Ville.

“Madison… I think you should look away honey… he might fall” Rebel said.

Suddenly a security guard walked over to the group, “Sir… sir… could you get down please!?” he called up to Knoxville.

“NO!!” Knoxville yelled back.

“Sir… if you do not get down I am going to have to kick you out…” the guard replied.

“Johnny… please… just get down… think about your daughter…” Rebel said.

“Urgh… fine… fine…” Knoxville whined as he started making his way down the windmill.

“That’s your dad?” the security guard asked Madison.

“Uhuh… Madison replied.

“How do you put up with him!?” the security guard laughed.