You Weren't There

Mathew Ariden looked at his phone to see another 20 voicemails from Alice Van Burough. He quickly erased them all.

“What are you doing?” Mathew looked up at the sound of his professor’s voice. Professor Johnson stared at Mathew as Mathew gave a sheepish smile. Phone were not allowed.

“Keep it away, Mister Ariden.” His professor said, pushing his spectacles up the bridge of his nose. Mathew nodded and tucked his phone into his pocket. He just wished Emily would stop calling him. Call after call after voicemail after email…She was fine. Sure, they were best friends but he had school and work to worry about. He didn’t need his best friend right now.

He didn’t need anyone.

○`○`○

“Hey, Matt.” Mathew looked over to see Ashley Conan. She fluttered her eyelashes at him and he suddenly realized what she was trying to do again.

“Uh-hi.” he said and started to walk towards the exit of the building. She quickly caught up, not faltering her plan to try to get to Mathew.

“So, what did you think about the assignment professor gave us? Totally bogus, right?” Ashley said, flipping her hair. Mathew found his way outside and walked towards the coffee cart. He needed to drink caffeine.

“Yeah, I guess so.” he agreed. His phone vibrated enthusiastically from his pocket and he jumped. He stopped and retrieved it from his pocket, looking at the caller ID:

Alice

He ignored the call, turning on his heel to see if Ashley was still there. She was there and had her head cocked to one side in curiosity.

“Who’s always calling you?” she asked, blinking. Mathew stared at her, that was kind of personal.

“Are you my mom or something?” he asked, incredulously. Ashley looked taken abock by this accusation.

“I’m sorry-I just-”

“I don’t need you, okay, Ashley? You keep on following me around like a lost puppy, and to tell the truth, it’s really irritating. So just stop, okay? I’m not interesting on dating you or whatever else you were planning.” Mathew rambled. A look of recognition crossed her face.

“Oh my-” she stuttered. “I knew it. You’re way to nice to be…” she shook her head and looked up at Mathew. He furrowed his eyebrows at her.

“What are you talking about?” he asked her.

“You’re gay. I knew it all along but I just thought-”

“Whoa, whoa. I’m not gay.” Mathew said, widening his eyes. Now she furrowed her eyebrows.

“Then, why don’t you want to date me? Everybody does. I’ve turned down some of the hottest guys because of you.” she said, confused.

“Well, then, you better start calling those guys back. I don’t want you, Ashley. Just grasp that thought, okay?” Mathew said, growing weary. He wanted to get to his dorm, and juts sleep.

“But-but-” Ashley spluttered. Mathew shook his head at her before walking past her, towards his dorm.

“I’m sorry.” he called over his shoulder. He was annoyed with the world. They all wanted something from him. His parents: Good grades and their perfect son. Ashley: Mathew himself. Even Alice: His company when she knew he was busy with other things. They didn’t think about what he wanted, what he needed. He’d thought he would want Alice to talk to but what he really wanted was to have no part of her. He was sick of her. Mathew winced at his cruel thoughts.

But the truth was he was sick of everyone.

He reached the boys’ building and entered it, not bothering to answer any of his fellow friend’s hellos. He was tired and sick of everybody around him. He didn’t want to talk to Alice. She was just another problem. He was furious. He was furious for everyone thinking he was perfect. Inside of his dorm, he punched the wall in anger. He unbuttoned his button-down plaid shirt, taking it off, and started hyperventilating, he punched the wall repeatedly to let his anger out but all that came out was blood from his hand.

His phone vibrated again and he got it from inside his pocket throwing it against the wall opposite of him. The door from his room opened and there stood his two friends from across the hall. He sat on his bed and put his head in his hands, knowing the blood would be in his hair now.

“Dude, are you alright?” one of the guys asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just go.” Mathew said, bringing his hand to his jeans and wiping it there. He wasn’t fine, though. Nothing was.