Stay With Them Tonight

“Bye,” I said to the other employee, a preppy girl about eighteen, and made my way out to my truck. I was happy just looking at it. I drove the ten miles home, stopping to get gas and two drinks at the corner store. I got him Coke, and Dr. Pepper for myself. Dr. Pepper is so darn good, especially the diet cherry, which tastes just like the regular cherry. I got the two 20 ounce bottles and went home to change.

Ryan had texted me that we were probably just watching movies at his house, so I changed into soft, yellow, smiley-face pajama bottoms and the first two tank tops I found- blue on top of black. I walked over with the drinks in hand and knocked on the door.

I heard a muffled shout, sounding like “come in,” so I opened the door and went to find him in the back living room. He was sitting with his legs up on the big couch, so I handed him his drink and flopped down on the smaller couch.

He switched the TV over from the X-box game station to the DVD player.

“How was work?” he asked, putting in Bruce Almighty, which wasn’t my favorite movie, but it was pretty funny. It was probably Jim Carrey’s best work.

I vaguely wondered how Morgan Freeman was always these all-powerful characters in almost every movie I had seen of him.

“It wasn’t too great, but it’s over. How was staying home all day?”

“I played Left for Dead all morning.” He sounded excited about it, and I looked at him oddly.

I was too jumpy to play most games like that, mostly because of my tendencies to get too into them. I would be plotting strategies, and a hoard would pop up, and I would jump a foot while shooting everything to bits, including my teammates.

“Ah, I see. Got popcorn?” I fluffed the couch pillow I was laying on, moving to get comfortable. It was dark in the room, the curtains drawn for the full theater effect, so it felt like night.

“Yeah.” He got up and walked to the kitchen. He was wearing scrub bottoms, which are really comfortable for sleeping in, and a t-shirt that looked like it had been thrown on last minute.

The movie kept playing, and he watched from the doorway while the popcorn popped. I smelled the delicious butteryness of it, and my mouth watered. Ryan came over with a big bowl, motioning me to move. I sat up and grabbed a handful as he sat down on the end of my couch.

I wasn’t comfortable anymore, so I propped my pillow up against his leg and laid down again, grabbing more popcorn. He laughed at me, but I was comfortable again, and there was just room enough for him to sit and me to lay down.

“Am I your new pillow?”

“Pillows don’t talk.” I saw him look at me after that, dramatically zipping his lips and swallowing the key. “You know you can’t swallow anything if your lips are zipped,” I stated. I felt, more than saw him grin. I stared at the screen, a smile creeping up on my face.

Sometime around three, Jason came in, loudly climbing the stairs and calling out “hey” over the railing above us. We heard his door shut, looking up like we might be able to see what he was doing through the door, but quickly forgot about him.

Ryan eventually gave me the bowl to hold, so I wouldn’t have to reach every time I wanted popcorn. This put his arm on my side so he could get to it.

I was so much more relaxed with him than I was with Jason. If it were Jason, I would be sitting on the other side of the room instead of directly under/on him. For a little while I wondered if this was exactly the best situation to be in when my best friend liked him, but it was harmless. He needed to sit to get to the popcorn, and I needed to be lying down.

We stayed like that until the movie ended, when I got up to choose the next one. I stupidly chose Saw I, which I hadn’t seen, and wound up probably leaving bruises all up Ryan’s arm.

By the time he offered his hand instead of me crushing his arm, I knew I was entering the gray territory between what should be done and what should not when a person is alone with someone her best friend likes. But we both knew, or at least, I was pretty sure we both knew, that Kelly liked Ryan.

The next scary part, or more like extremely unsettling part, came up, and my hesitation taking Ryan’s hand ended. I held it in both of mine, and he chuckled. I was now sitting up, leaning forward with my legs under me.

Distantly I noticed my whole left side was touching Ryan, but I was much more intent on trying not to kill his hand while paying attention to the movie.

Even to myself, my brain sounded like it was making excuse after excuse. Really, I still had a tiny crush on Ryan, but it’s not like I wasn’t aware how differently our closeness might be taken.

I tried to convince myself he was still just a friendly neighbor, with the labels “Best Friend’s Crush” and “Person You Cannot Have” tattooed on his forehead. But he didn’t put a stop to anything, and I for whatever reason didn’t either.

You can see where this is going.

*****

When the movie ended and the credits started playing, I realized how tight my grip was, and how freaked out I had been. Ryan was looking at me like he didn’t know whether to be amused or think I was crazy. Probably both.

I released his hand, and he flexed his fingers, moving them back and forth to get circulation back into them. Or to see if they were broken.

“I think we need to get you a stress ball,” he told me, grinning. The pent-up adrenaline was running through my system, making my heart beat faster and my head feel light. I started laughing, like, really laughing.

It was one of those times that it seemed like the situation was the funniest thing ever, but couldn’t remember why. Ryan couldn’t help but laugh with me after I almost fell off the couch, and I think he was laughing at my oddness a little bit.

There was the music from the credits playing in the background, and the room was still dark. Ryan and I looked at each other, trying to sober up. I closed my eyes, hoping if I wasn’t looking at him, I could stop laughing faster.

It worked.

We stopped, and I caught my breath. I turned to him again, opening my eyes and finding him there already. He was centimeters from my face, and that distance disappeared as his mouth found mine in the dark room.

His lips were only against mine for a couple seconds, a few seconds in which I realized they were soft, and tasted like buttery popcorn, before my brain caught up with the situation and I jerked back.

“Ryan?” He was still close to me, closer than normal. His eyes were a deep green, and I was shocked to realize I hadn’t known that. At least, I hadn’t ever thought about it like that.

He leaned back, but not enough. I felt the need to be miles away from him at the moment, hopefully erasing what had just happened.

“Allie? What’s wrong?”

“Uh, I, wow. Kelly likes you?” I wondered if he knew. He looked surprised. I was completely confused, nervous, and embarrassed, and now it looked like he hadn’t even known that?

“I thought she might, but what about you?” He tugged lightly on a strand of my hair, his hand close to my cheek.

“Er, I have to go, Ryan. I’ll see you later.” I jumped up and walked quickly to the door. He came up behind me, so I turned.

“Later, okay?” I asked. He nodded, unsure. I opened the door and rushed out.

If either of us had looked back at the top of the stairs, we might have seen Jason standing at the railing looking over the family room, looking at us in shock from the darkness.

He had seen everything.

*****

I was pacing back and forth in my bedroom, after lying down, trying to stare at the ceiling and think. My face was burning, and it wouldn’t stop.

I have to tell her, I decided.

That figured out, I walked out of my house. It was about six, and I had been home for almost an hour, my mind running in circles.

I didn’t bother changing, or grabbing a coat. I ran straight to Kelly’s house, too impatient to walk. I didn’t realize she wasn’t supposed to be there, or notice the strange car out front.

I knocked on the door, four rapid knocks that matched my heart.

Should I really tell her? It’ll hurt her. I moved constantly, unable to keep my body, as well as my mind, still. She’s my best friend; I have to.

I heard voices from inside the house, but they were muffled and I couldn’t even tell who was speaking. After what seemed like forever, the door finally opened.

“Kelly, I’m sor-” I stopped, and my body grew uncomfortably hot. I was blushing down to my toes. Kelly always answered the door. Why wasn’t it her?

“Allie?” Blue eyes, completely different than Kelly’s brown ones, stared at me.

“Ty-Tyler!?”