I've Done Something So Terrible

“What is going on?” Mrs. Jarema, the principal, questioned in a silky voice that made my skin crawl. She looked at the three of us and no one said anything. “Fine, you three come to my office. Everyone else go to class.” she instructed. The crowd broke up and we followed her to the office. I hated being here. But it was an excused absence from class, and I didn't do anything wrong. So on the whole it was a win.

“Now that there isn't an audience would you care to explain what that was all about?” she asked in a calm voice. That meant she was trying to be nice, I hated when she acted like she cared. I wasn't going to be the first one to talk, and Alex didn't really know what happened. Jasey was in tears but I saw her giving me a death glare. I felt like she was going to jump across Alex and claw my face off. Alex just sat with his arms across his chest looking so uncomfortable. I wanted to put my arm around him, tell him everything was alright. But I was too scared of Jasey ripping it off.

“He told everyone that Alex got me pregnant!” Jasey finally accused.

“Mrs. Jarema you know me! I do a lot of things but I would not do that.” I pleaded with her.

“I believe you Jack. Jasey do you have any proof that Mr. Barakat did this?” she asked showing no emotion.

“No.” she said her voice growing small. Alex's face was beat red. He obviously felt very uncomfortable with this subject. Jasey rubbed her stomach and tears began flowing again.

“Jasey are you actually pregnant?” Jarema questioned with wide eyes, she was alittle slow on the uptake today clearly. I don't blame her, dealing with this first thing in the morning was not my cup of tea either.

“Yes.” Jasey answered in an even smaller voice.

“Have you told your parents?” she asked completely ignoring me and Alex.

“I was going to but someone heard and told them before I could. Everyone knows! Jack told everyone!” she screamed trying to get the attention off of herself. Alex covered his ear in pain.

“I did not. You told your friends one of them could have easily said something. The only person I told was my Mom.” I explained.

“Jasey I think who told is the least of your problems. I hope you realize that you will have to leave school.” Jarema explained.

“What?” Jasey yelped looking at a wide eyed Alex, while I just sunk into my chair.

“Yes, you will have to go to the school for teen mothers downtown. We do not want other girls seeing your example and following in your footsteps. .If we have one teen mother it turns into an epidemic.” she explained.

“This is bullshit!” Jasey screamed. “This moron is too stupid to wear a condom! And I get kicked out of school!” she screamed even more. I was really scared and Alex looked like he was nearly in tears, and his face was redder then I had ever seen it. I was boiling with anger.

“Shut the fuck up! You are just as responsible for this! You could have kept your fucking legs shut!” I roared. Her mouth closed and she buried her face in her hands. Alex looked at me like I had three heads and Jarema remained expressionless.

“Jack I am going to have to give you detention for your colorful language. I hope you realize that.” she said. I just nodded. “Alex, Jasey I think considering the situation it would be a good idea if I called both your parents in and we all talked about this.” she offered. Alex nodded his head in agreement. Jasey shook her head no.
“No! This is none of your business why can't I just stay in school and get really fat like in Juno?” she asked desperately.

“Because this is not a movie. Movies are not real. And besides if you had seen For Keeps which is a better more realistic movie you would have seen Molly Ringwald get kicked out of school.” Jarema replied getting sick of Jasey's screaming. “Jack you have detention this afternoon. You may go to class. Alex, Jasey I'm calling your parents.” she said before getting up from her desk. I followed giving Alex an apologetic look. He gave me a small smile and a wave. Which made my heart fluttered and I smiled back. I could here Jasey scream at Alex through the door and cringed.
I trudged to class and gave the teacher my pass. That smile Alex gave me kept replaying in my head. It gave me hope that my best friend was still in there. Maybe everything wouldn't have to change. I wanted to tell him. More then I can even explain. I just knew that it was a bad idea. I had to wait. Wait for a moment when everything else faded away and it was just me and Alex. So that I would get a real response. Not one veiled in worries about a baby or Jasey, or his parents or anyone else. When it was just me and Alex. Because in the end that is who this is about. My feelings for Alex only effect the two of us, I don't want anyone else being a part of that. School went on slowly, I've seen humans evolve faster for crying out loud. When the final bell rang I bolted for my locker. I don't even know what the homework assignment for that class was, not that I do homework. I hadn't heard from Alex, and he hadn't been at lunch. But he was still in a meeting with Jarema when lunch came around. I looked at my phone hoping I had missed a text but I hadn't, so I just started walking towards detention.
A few of Jasey's friends shot me death glares while I made my way down the hall. I didn't care at this point. I walked into detention and saw the familiar gray beanie in front of me. I stumbled towards his desk and sat down.
“You got detention too?” I asked.

“Yeah, things got pretty heated in the principals office.” Alex replied with a slight pink tint to his cheeks.

“I'm sure. I was worried about you. Jasey looked like she was going to kill you.” I said with a sympathetic look.

“She might try after Jarema kicked her out of school. I didn't know they would kick her out of school. Her parents think its all my fault. Shit, this is all my fault.” Alex said smacking his head on the desk in front of him. More people walked into detention and our adviser for the afternoon, so the conversation died. The hours ticked by slowly I was dying to talk to Alex. He looked so miserable and he was clearly struggling with his math homework.

“Okay I do not want to be here any more then you kids do. So don't tell any one and we can get out ten minutes early.” the adviser said. We all nodded and mumbled in agreement and began collecting our things. I waited for Alex to finish packing up his things, we were the last people out of the room. He gave me a weak smile when we made eye contact.

“Hey I really don't want to go home right now. Do you think I could come hang at yours for a bit?” Alex asked me as we made our way to the front doors of the school.

“Sure, I'm sure my Mom wouldn't mind having you over for dinner.” I told him with a smile. Secretly I was dying to have some alone time with Alex. I just wanted some kind of reassurance that our friendship wasn't changing. Every time I thought about Alex's situation it made my heart clench painfully. Partly because of how much I worried about him, and a more selfish part worried about how I was. It was a constant reminder that Alex was everything and that I had to do everything possible not to lose him. More so I was looking for a moment and enough courage to tell him the truth about how I felt. Every time I thought about it I talked myself out of it, saying it was selfish or it would just hurt him more. But then I would go home and sit alone and wish he were there, that he knew, and that I could kiss him.
We got into my car just before it started to rain. I turned Blink-182 on in my car stereo. Down started play from where it had left off this morning. I had to laugh of the irony. Alex gave me a weird look but didn't question me. I shrugged and drove the short drive to my home. We got out of the car and went straight upstairs to my room.

“Are you hungry?” I asked.

“No.” he said to his shoes.

“Don't look so glum, everything is gonna be okay.” I reassured him. I hated seeing him sad I just wanted him to smile. His smile brightened my world, it was so perfect. Wow, I really sound like a girl sometimes.

“I'm not so sure anymore.” Alex mumbled towards the floor again. I put my hand under his chin so he would look me in the eyes.

“I know things suck right now. I'm not trying to play down your pain or anything, but I'm here. I know if you just lean on me we can make it through this. We're a team, you can't break us up. We're like peanut butter and jelly.” I explained and that made a smile break out on his face. At that moment I just wanted to blurt it out and tell him I loved him. Except that the instant I pictured it in my mind Alex's face fell and that perfect smile was gone. He looked at me in disgust and ran out. I couldn't deal with that. So instead I pulled him into a comforting hug that was more to comfort me then it was for him.
We spent the rest of the afternoon playing video games and ignoring everything outside of my room. Ignoring the storm, his parents, Jasey, her family. We both just needed one more simple afternoon before everything changed.