Rapunzel: Frerard Style

Gerard Way sat in his tower, stroking his sass - I mean hair – lovingly. He loved his hair…it was his pride and joy, his raison d’etre. Well, he knew he was entirely beautiful anyway, but the hair was just the cherry on the cake, the Mikey on the Sparkles.
Picking up a recently de-haired hairbrush, he began to comb gently through his shockingly red locks. But even with his gorgeously gorgeous ridiculously long red hair, Gerard had always felt he was missing something. When he was six years old he’d been locked in this tower, and now, fourteen whole years later, he still hadn’t left.
Of course, he didn't mind that much...it was a damn awesome tower. On the first floor there was a kitchen were a dozen little elves lived, and they constantly provided Gerard with cupcakes and ice-cream and cookies. And coffee. The second and third floors were cleaning/storage rooms, and on the fourth floor there was a mini-gym for Gerard to use, to make sure he didn’t put on too much weight – after all, Princesses simply cannot be overweight.
And that is exactly what Gerard Way was, a princess.
The tower was pink - perfectly pink, with shiny bricks and a fuchsia, glittery roof, and in Gerard's room, everything was pink too - excluding a few photos and posters he had put up, because he definitely enjoyed Prince Frankie Iero not in pink...although, on the subject, it might not look too bad...
Prince Frankie Iero was a nearby Prince who Gerard sometimes heard wandering through the forest around him, but he had only seen him once and - being the clever sneaky person that Gerard was - he already had his 14megapixel camera on the ready, so as soon as poor innocent Frankie appeared within shot, Gerard zoomed (x10 optical) and took a few pictures for personal reference, all of which involved Frankie looking terribly confused and herding around five to ten dogs on a few leads. At one point, Gerard could have sworn he'd heard him muttering DAMN CHECKBOOK!! WHERE DID THAT WOMAN HIDE IT THIS TIME?!!? MY DOGS NEED ME! but he was just ever so slightly out of earshot, so it could've just as easily been something about ham, penguins, lift shafts and the Grinch who stole Christmas.
Not that Gerard had any stalker tendencies: it just wasn't very often that he got to interact with other people, and at that very moment he had decided that he very much appreciated Prince Frankie's appearance. And no harm could possibly come of it, so there was absolutely NO need to worry, he reassured himself.
Gerard had also learned a few years ago, back when he was 16, that he had a brother, a brother who went by the name of Mikey, and was legendary for his constant poker-face: but he too had been locked in a tower, a tower very far from Gerard's, in a mystical land where tale tells that the unicorns and coffee-sellers roamed. Gerard wished that coffee-sellers roamed around him...maybe he could make a rope out of his clothes, and they could tie gigantic mugs full of the stuff to the end and he could pull it through his window for his own delectation. Of course, the elves sometimes made him coffee, but under the strict rules of his parents he was allowed no more than two cups a day.
Two cups a day.
Gerard slumped down on his bed and threw the hairbrush to the floor in a huff, sighing at how suddenly unfair his life was. He'd heard the calls of others outside his tower numerous times...but he was never permitted to be free with them, to be free and gay in the jolly wind, to dance around the pretty flowers, singing in to the wind. Singing cheered Gerard up a lot. He'd often write songs to fit his mood.
He decided now would be a good time to start one, considering tears of resent were already making their appearance and smudging his perfectly applied eyeliner.
He leant out of his window precariously, thankful that once he'd reached the age of 10 his parents had been generous enough to remove the bars so that he could stick his head out and watch the world go by. Not that there was anything of interest out there: just endless hills, trees and the evil thorn bush that surrounded the bottom of the tower. It honestly was evil. Once, it had even had the nerve to tell Gerard that his hair looked like he had been dragged through a bush backwards. Gerard cried for hours, days on end, until he got into such a state that the elves made the bush apologise and accept that it was a ridiculously untrue insult, and especially hypocritical considering it was a bush who told Gerard that in the first place.
Gerard and the bush hadn't spoken since. It was a stand-off, and Gerard felt he was winning, especially when he'd 'accidentally' dropped some eye shadow out of the window and it coated the thorns with glitter and sparkles.
Sighing again, he leant his hand in the window frame and supported his sorry head with it, letting his voice carry him away.
I'm locked in this place. My hands start to shake
I know it's dramatic, but time's gone to waste
It's been twenty years. Escape is nowhere near
and I'm just a Princess, just a Princess...
You hear all those songs about girls now,
Wishing they lived life like me
But when you've been here for these twenty damn years
You'd give any glitter to be free...
I'd give any glitter to be free...
Twirling his hair in his fingers, Gerard leant even further, allowing his unscarred face to soak up the sun.
The elves, they're my friends
They fix my split ends
They make me cookies and they buy me gel pens
but elves aren't the same, elves are insane
I want that one person to make it okay
I want that one person to make it a game
I want that one person to come, and we'll play...
Suddenly he broke down in to dramatic sobs, echoing in to the sky for all to hear. Falling back into his room, so full of everything he loved yet so devoid of interest, he sat on the floor hugging his knees for what seemed like forever. Rocking back and forth, burying his face in his hands to stifle the cries, using box after box of tissues delivered to him by the kindly elves, straining his eyes to adjust to the darkness that began to grow around him. Gerard Way was a Princess. Gerard Way was beautiful. Gerard Way was lonely.

-
A few hours later when Gerard had almost managed to dry his rapidly shrinking eyes, (at one point he looked in the mirror and thought his eyes had actually disappeared because they were so small, but then realised they had to still be there because he was looking at his reflection through them) he heard the soft pitter, patter of footsteps a long way away. He knew the elves would be asleep at this time. They'd locked his window, but being the sassy, genius young adult that he was, he knew perfectly well how to pick a lock. After all, how else was he supposed to have spent sixteen years? And he had enough hair pins to last him the rest of his life.
Sliding one quickly out of his hair, he was temporarily distracted from his crying fit as he forced it inside the lock and twisted it slowly. It took a few tries, but eventually there was a satisfying 'click' and it swung open gently, to reveal the starry night sky.
Gerard Way – Queen of Sass – never took chances. He quickly hurried to the hairbrush on the floor, the mirror on the wall, the eyeliner buried somewhere in his duvet and made sure his eyes didn't look as pathetically small as they could've. He also changed into a black shirt – yes, just because Gerard loved pink didn't mean he always dressed in it - simply because it didn't smell like stale tears.
Then, he leant outside, poised in the perfect position for any happening passers-by.
And he waited.
He waited some more, he waited some more.
The footsteps were still there.
Sweet fuckery, they're far away, he thought.
And they were.
He waited some more.
Slowly, the footsteps got louder and louder – unless Gerard was just imagining it – and it was all he could to not fall asleep in the pathetically long wait.
Just as he felt slightly delusional and almost in the mood for giving up, a figure appeared some distance away in the darkness. It was short but well-formed, and it walked with quite a sense of authority for a short person – a short man, judging by their build – and it was also wearing very very very tight trousers, which excited Gerard a lot.
Gerard suddenly stifled a giggle. What if it's Frankie? Prince Frankie? Come to rescue me at last?
And...and it was.
As the person walked closer and closer Gerard felt his eyes adjusting to the man's face, recognising the amazing bone structure he had studied for so long on the photos of his. And he was able to hear the man's muttering...stupid goddamn woman and her chequebook...I'm glad to be rid of her...all she ever was was trouble, not allowing me all the dog rescues I wanted to do...
Gerard suddenly seized his chance, sass-determination kicking in, swearing that he not to miss a second of this opportunity.
He began to sing, sing the lonely song he had sung so many times before, and Prince Frankie looked up immediately at the notes flying through the air.
“Why, kind Miss, you have a very beautiful voice!” he exclaimed. Gerard paused, giggling.
“But I am no Miss! I am Princess Gerard Way. And I think I already know who you are.” he winked, but it was lost in the darkness.
“Prince Frankie Iero, at your service.” Frankie bowed, reaching the bottom of the tower, just before the thorn bush. Gerard sort of made out what he was doing, but he could've just been kissing his own knees. Who knows.
“What're you doing up there?” Frankie asked, intrigued by this mysterious person. He had nothing to lose, and everything to gain.
“Oh...don't mind me.” Gerard sunk back dramatically, deliberately emphasising the loneliness in his voice. “I've been up here ever since I was six. I've never left.” He paused. “Only elves have ever been here with me. I can't escape.”
There was silence. “I'll find a way.” Frankie said suddenly.
“Oh Frankie, could you?” Gerard flung himself forward again, almost falling out of the window. “Would you?"
“Careful!” Frankie giggled. “Of course I will. Is there any way of making light, so that I can see you?” he asked nervously.
“Yes, yes of course...” Gerard rushed around, lighting his fireplace and various candles around his room until it was lit up perfectly. He then stepped back to the window, worried in case Frankie had gotten bored already, and left. But he was still there, still staring hopefully.
“Why, Princess Gerard, you're beautiful!”he gasped. Gerard's red hair was perfectly lit up by the light. “Gerard, Gerard...let down you hair.” he called. Gerard shivered at his voice, and the words he'd wanted to hear for so long. And then Gerard did: he let down his hair. He pulled out the pins, the clips, the bands that had hidden the truth for so long; and when he did, he leant his hair out of the window, and it reached just above Frankie's head. All red, all amazing. Fiery. Alive. “Can I...?” Frank asked. Gerard nodded, the tresses of his hair swaying to the movement.
Frank grabbed on to Gerard's hair in a gentlemanly way, and began to climb the tower, careful not to make too much noise. Gerard kept whimpering quietly – it hurt, but he'd been waiting for so long...he wasn't going to waste this chance because it hurt him a bit.
“Are you okay, oh wonderful Gerard?” Frank called, when he was about half way up.
“MmmmmhmmcourseIamPrinceFrankie...” Gerard mumbled, his eyes screwed up. It really fucking hurt, but he didn't want to ruin this moment.
Suddenly, there it was, Frankie's face at the window. Grinning. Lit up. Perfect. Prince Frankie Iero. Gerard pulled him inside, and pulled the biggest smile he'd ever pulled.
“Can I keep you?” he whispered into the silence.
Frankie said nothing; he simply leant forward and kissed Gerard quietly, gently, intimately. Giggling, Gerard pulled away, taking his hair back inside with him and tucking it behind his ears, making them bend forward awkwardly, as ears do.
“Run away with me.” Frank whispered back. Gosh, everything was moving so fast for Gerard, but he loved it.
“Okay!” he grinned, breaking the romantic mood.
Frank gasped. “Really? Would you?”
Gerard nodded back. “Of course. I've been looking for a reason to escape for ten years. As long as you let me bring a suitcase.” he widened his eyes pleadingly.
“Good lord Gerard, you look like one of my dogs...how can I resist that?” Frank shook his head, pitying himself for being so sensitive. Gerard grinned.
“That's a yes then!” he suddenly began dashing around the room, grabbing a London Fashion Week bag that he'd made one of the elves order him and filling it with make-up, pyjamas, clothes, scarves...lots and lots of scarves. “Tell me why you're wandering lonely as a cloud, Sir Frankie.”
“Well, I...” Frankie sighed. “It's quite sad really. I have a passion for dogs, you see, and I often want to buy and look after any homeless ones I see...well, any I see I want to buy really...and my fiancée, Jamia, kept getting annoyed with me because I always used her chequebook. So earlier she burnt all her chequebooks and told me the marriage was off. I treated myself to three new dogs with a chequebook I'd hidden a few months ago, but then I felt like a wander to kick off the bad feelings, you know? I just...” he looked down, voice cracking, and Gerard thought he was crying, so he wandered over and sat next to him. He put an arm around him comfortingly, rubbing his back.
“You know,” he said, “I'm pretty much done packing. And when we get out of here, I'll buy you all the dogs and chequebooks you've ever wanted.”
Frankie's eyes lit up. “Oh Princess Gee, would you really do that? I love you already!” and he hugged him.
Gerard suddenly leapt up and dug some large, strong scissors out of a box by his bed. Before Frank could say anything he had begun to chop off his long, precious hair, and suddenly Frank was nearly yelling. It was a good thing elves don't sleep lightly.
“NO! GERARD! What're you doing?!?! Are you crazy?!? Your hair is beautiful! Don't do this!” Gerard only giggled, and carried on. “How else am I supposed to get out of here silly? I need to climb down my hair too. Besides, it was getting annoying.”
He'd cut it to about chin length, and he looked exactly like a little pixie...still just as beautiful, Frank decided, if not more.
“Aaaaaah.” he sunk back down, grinning. “I understand. And you know what, I think you look even more gorgeous than you did before.”
“Oh Frankie, you're too kind.” he giggled, and then checked his reflection. “and you're right.” He spent a few minutes ruffling his hair to the appropriate 'sexiness,' and then suddenly he was ready: that was it, they were going to leave.
Together they pushed Gerard's bed to the window, and tied his hair tightly to one of the posts. Gerard dropped his bag out of the window with a clonk – everything was cushioned by the duvet he'd packed (the bag was like a handheld T.A.R.D.I.S. Except it couldn't time travel...undetectable extension charm then.) “You're going first.” Frank said sternly, “because if the hair starts falling I can tie it back up. And if the elves come, you'll still be able to escape.”
“No, I couldn't possibly...I...you, what if...” but Frank had already begun tying the hair around Gerard's perfectly shaped waste, and so he didn't resist. Once it was secure Gerard clambered out of the window, checking his reflection and adjusting his hair one last time as he did so.
It took a few scares, giggles and cries of 'Frankie baby!' before Gerard was safely down, and he managed to kick off the wall far enough to miss the rose bush. Now it was only Frank they had to worry about...but it felt so great on the ground, and Gerard ran around just because he could, enjoying the sweet night air and the fact that he was able to go anywhere.
Looking back up at the window, he saw Frank climbing out speedily...and it was all Gerard could do not to stare at his wonderful ass.
Bad Gerard, he thought. Naughty.
But it was really wonderful.
“Mind the bush when you get to the bottom,” Gerard warned – a second too late. Frankie was about 5 feet above it when suddenly the rope of hair became loose and he fell, spun, face first into the bush.
Gerard screamed, a piercing scream.
He screamed, and he ran over.
Frank was lying there.
Lying there, unmoving.
Lying there.
Unmoving.
“Frankie, baby?! Frankie, no, you're my Prince, don't do this to me...” he dragged him out of the bush, panicking, and laid him on the ground to see his face covered in harsh scratches. Leaning his face against his chest, he was pretty certain he'd heard a heartbeat, and he didn't seem to have any deadly injuries so Gerard sat by his side forlornly for what seemed like hours until the sun begun to come up. He was muttering, whispering, murmuring... “Frankie, Frankie, Frankie...”
Suddenly, when light was creeping up on them, Frankie's eyes fluttered open...unseeing.
“G...Gerard?” he fumbled to get the words from his mouth.
“Frankie! I'm here honey! I'm right here...” he grabbed his hands and held them to his chest, eyes fixated on Frankie's face.
“I can't...I can't see...anything, you...where...”
No.
Frank had been blinded by that evil, evil, fucking maniac fucking bastard rose bush. Gerard swore, seeing read, which made Frank giggle despite himself. His eyes were red and sore and scratched, and there was blood around them...blood Gerard hadn't noticed before, in the shock and the horror of the fall. In a fit of anger he ran at the rose bush, shouting, prepared to kick it and hit it over and over with his dainty limbs.
“NO! Gerard, don't, it'll hurt you too! Gerard!” Frankie shouted. Gerard faltered and stopped, breathing heavily, and then turned back and ran to the wounded Prince's side.“Sorry, sorry, I...it...it's okay Frankie. I'm still here for you. I'll still by you those dogs. I'll still...”
Suddenly, Frankie burst into tears.
“I'll never see my dogs again! I'll never see your beautiful face again, Gerard!”
But at that very moment the sound of a horse could be heard, and seconds later a unicorn appeared – a beautiful, sparkling unicorn, with a handsome man astride.
“What seems to be the problem?”
The man leapt down; he was taller than Frank, and wore glasses; his face was constantly tilted upwards in attempt to keep them on his face. “I'm Mikey Way, escaped from the tower of MikeyWaydom, and this is Sparkles.” He stood protectively before his glittery unicorn.
“Anybody for a coffee?”
“COFFKEY?!” Gerard gasped, a strange mixture of 'Mikey' and 'coffee.' “I'm Gerard Way! I'm your brother!” he leapt towards the man, and hugged him suddenly. “And yes, I would like some coffee!” Mikey laughed straight-faced, and hugged him back tentatively. Frank spoke a quiet “Me too!” in the background.
Gerard then remembered Frankie lying on the floor, and how he was blind...and he felt like he'd known his skinny, tangled-in-his-own-limbs brother forever. “Oh Mikey, the most terrible thing has happened.” he looked at the floor, knowing his eyeliner was smudging everywhere again, but not caring for once.
“Prince Frankie Iero...my Prince...has been blinded by this horrible rose bush.” he sniffled, and Frankie lay on the floor, still unaware of the giant sparkly unicorn standing next to him.
“Gerard? Where are you sweetie? Gerard?” he sounded panicky, so Gerard gently knelt down next to him and took his hand, holding it tightly, passionately.
“Oh brother,” Mikey said formally, “I have but the perfect antidote.” and at that moment Sparkles begin to cry pure, glittery pink tears that shone as if they were radioactive, or carrying something so strong that nothing could stop it in it's path. “Unicorn tears will heal anything from a blemish to a broken heart. My good friend Ray Toro taught me that when we roamed the lands of Rivendell for months on end...but then he was arrested for cupcake abuse.” he gazed into the distance, and then looked back, frowning. Suddenly a smile almost formed on his face, perhaps at the realisation that he'd just met his brother...but not successfully, however, the pokerface remained in all its glory.
Mikey cupped the tears into his hand and poured them carefully on to Frankie's damaged eyes...which fizzed, and healed instantly. Frankie sat bolt upright, a massive smile on his face.
“It worked! Gerard, darling, it actually worked! I can see you, my beautiful angel!” Gerard almost choked on his own happiness as he jumped up to hug Frankie once again, and Mikey shed a tear of happiness silently in the corner for his newly-found brother.
“Now I must leave you.” Mikey said gravely, “For there is trouble in the Shire. I have heard word of the Nazgûl returning to the Hobbit's doors; this behaviour cannot be stood for. I must consult Galadriel in Lothlorien immediately afterwards.” He looked towards the skies, and mounted Sparkles once again. “Brother, take my coffee beans, I have many to spare. It will be my parting gift. Good luck, and goodbye.” and with that, he rode away into the sunset.
“I have absolutely...no idea...what on earth dear Mikey was on about.” Gerard said to Frankie, once they were out of earshot.
“Me neither. But it sounded pretty cool...and did you see that? He had a staff attached to that unicorns. Baby, I think you're brother's a wizard.”
“Well!” Gerard giggled, eyes full of lucious sass. “Fancy that.”
He took Frankie's hand, and together they walked in the morning light through the forests, over rivers and through valleys, until they reached Frankie's mansion...and Gerard drowned in a sea of dogs.
No, I'm joking, he made his way through the dogs, and he supplied Frankie with love, kisses and chequebooks forever more.
The last thing that could be heard from the Prince and the Princess last night was, in a hushed whisper,
“Hey, Frankie...can I have a boa instead of a wedding ring?”
and the answer was, of course... “yes.”