My Best Friend

“Have you decided on name yet?” Jimmy questions me as we stare at the precious tiny boy in my arms.
I smile up at him, nodding my head at him as my eyes meet his while he sits on the edge of my bed.

“Landon” I say softly and Jimmy smiles, tilting his head to the side, “Landon James Charles Saunders” I state softly and Jimmy kisses the side of me head as I stroke my fingers gently down Landon’s face.
“He’s beautiful” Jimmy tells me softly and I budge up letting Jimmy lie with me.
Jimmy caresses my damp hair in a brotherly fashion as we stare at my son’s tiny face, happiness filling my heart.

“You’re his and Blaze’s godfather Jimmy” I tell him and Jimmy grins, before he kisses my head again before a knock comes from the door and Leana pokes her head into the room, Blaze, Cassie, Kane, Kris and Eric, my younger brother appearing behind her.

“Mummy” Blaze cries happily, running into the room and standing beside my bed.
He peaks at Landon, a grin making its way onto his face as Jimmy picks him up and places Blaze on his lap.

“Can I hold him?” Eric questions, as everyone crowds around my bed and I nod my head at the fourteen year old.
He takes him carefully from my arms, holding Landon's head up and Landon curls into his arms.

“Hey buddy” My baby brother coos to his second nephew, and Blaze peeks over his arms to look at his little brother.
“I’m your Uncle Eric” he coos to Landon and Blaze’s smile grows wider.
“And I’m you big brother Blaze!” Blaze exclaims to Landon softly.
“What have you called him?” Leana questions as my parents walk into the room, balloons, presents, toys and coffee in their hands.

I grin at them as they rush over to the bed, placing the items in their hands on a side counter of the room.
“Landon” I tell them and my mum immediately starts to gush, telling me how much she loves the name as she stands beside Eric, her face adoring as she stares at her 2nd born grandson.

Blaze slowly crawls into my lap, his face shining as he stares up at me.
“Landon comes home with us?” Blaze questions me as he looks over to his grandparents, my mother now fawning over Landon.
“Landon’s going to come home with us in a couple days” I tell him and he cuddles into my chest, as my eyes start to feel heavy.

Kane grins at me as Jimmy moves from beside me, grabbing Cassie so she could get a look at her god brother.
“Good job kiddo” Kane tells me, ruffling my hair before he kisses my head, “He’s truly beautiful.”
I grin up at him, looking over to my youngest child as Blaze snuggles deeper into my chest, his breathing becoming heavy and his eyes lowering.
I rub my hands up and down his back before looking at my older cousin, a smile on my lips, “He is” I reply and Kane grins, his eyes faltering slightly.

“Are you considering about telling his father” Kane questions me softly and I shake my head as my mother passes Landon back to me, before she kisses my head and my parent’s leave, Eric staying behind.
“No” I mutter, looking down at Landon.
He opens his eyes revealing Matt’s hazel – golden tint eyes, an exact copy before he yawns slightly, showing of the deep dimples in his cheeks.

“He’s an exact copy of his Daddy” Jimmy says softly and I nod my head in agreement, my heart hurting slightly.
“He is” I tell them softly, and Kane stares at me, his gaze prominent.
“Maybe you should tell him” Kane says softly, his eyes searching my face.
“Matt made his decision and I made mine. He’s married and I have kids” I reply, looking back down to my sleeping boys in my arms.
“Chloe, Matt-”

“I’m sure he’s content with his life. Because these boys are my life and I’m happy” I tell Kane, cutting Jimmy off and Kane nods his head, before he kisses my head again, brushing my hair back before his fingers brush Landon’s face.
“Are you sure?” He asks me as his fingers brush Landon’s hair back, “He was your best friend Chloe, think about this one please.” Kane whispers to me softly, and I look down to my two boys.
“You’re right Kane, he was my best friend, but he is definitely not now, he wasn’t the man I knew when I left, and he isn’t my best friend.”