Have Faith in Me

“All right, so let’s start with you, Rach. How was it touring with these guys?” Allie asked, as she started a tape recorder she had brought. I glanced at the guys, flashing them a smile.

“Well, it was quite the experience,” I started, “They never really had a boring moment. Sure there were times when we were all pretty relaxed, but whoever I was with sure kept me laughing. And backstage, these guys are just so weird.”

“Any particular moments that you loved?”

“It’s hard just to pick one. There are so many moments that I will remember forever that I’m not sure what to choose.” Allie shifted in her seat.

“Now, there have been rumors for quite awhile that you’re dating a certain lead singer. Care to deny or confirm these rumors?” I wordlessly held up mine and Matt’s clasped hands.

“I think this pretty much confirms the rumors,” I laughed. “I’m probably gonna have fan girls wanting to kill me or write fan fictions where I’m the bitch ex.” Allison and the guys laughed.

“We’ll take care of those crazy fan girls,” Brian assured.

“Plus I’m sure there are plenty of fans that are happy Matt has you,” Allison reasoned. She turned to the guys. “How was it touring with a girl on the bus?”

“Nothing new. We’ve done it before with our girlfriends and such although it was different that she was constantly snapping photos of us,” Zacky answered.

“I happen to love it since that girl is mine,” Matt added with a small chuckle. I rolled my eyes, blushing a bit. Allison smiled.

“You guys did Uproar, telling fans you weren’t sure what you would do after this tour after losing The Rev. Do you guys have a better idea what you’re gonna do?”

“I think I speak for all of us when I say it’s probably best we keep on making music not only because we love making music but to thank the fans for being there for us after Jimmy’s passing and to continue on Jimmy’s legacy,” Johnny said.

“Although no one would ever be able to fill his shoes,” Brian cut in, his voice firm.

“That’s understandable. Being a fan of you guys myself, I agree when you say that. Mike Portnoy sure did an amazing job with you guys though,” Allison said.

“He did and we appreciate that he helped us get back up on our feet. It’s still hard thinking about how we’re never going to go out on stage with our brother anymore, you know?” Zacky admitted. The guys all had solemn looks on their faces. Brian’s eyes had glazed over a bit, clearly trying not to cry. Johnny had his eyes fixated on the ground and Matt’s hold on my hand had tightened.

“You know, one of the things that I noticed about the guys that I loved,” I interrupted, “was the love they had for each other. With the joking and screwing around, they were there if one of them needed it. After every show they congratulated each other for another great show done and a bunch of other things. That’s something I admired even as a fan; the respect and love they had for each other.”

The interview continued for about another hour before we were done.

“Rachel will let you guys know when everything’s all organized and when the issue’s coming out,” Allison told the guys. They nodded.

“Let’s go eat!” Brian suggested.

“Ruby’s at the pier?” I asked, looking around at all of them. After various yes’s, we climbed into each of our cars, agreeing to go to the Seal Beach pier. Once in the car, I turned to Matt. “What’s wrong? You’ve been awfully quiet.” He tossed me a glance, saying nothing. “And don’t even think about telling me nothing’s wrong, Matt.” Matt let out a frustrated sigh. He parked the car, his hands dropping from the wheel. I glanced out and saw we weren’t at the pier yet.

“The guys and I are going on tour again,” he said quietly. I froze.

“What? You’re kidding right? You just got back from tour!”

“I know but Larry had a European tour scheduled before Uproar and said he’d give us all of Uproar to decide whether or not we wanted to do it. We accepted it.” I looked out the window.

“When do you leave?”

“Next week.”

“How long?”

“A month. We’ll be back a week before Christmas.” The questions and answers seemed mechanical, almost rehearsed, even on my part. “Rachel, I know this is new for you seeing as you’ve never dated a guy that tours around a lot-” I cut him off with a kiss. Matt looked at me, an expression of surprise on his face.

“I don’t like the idea of you leaving. But,” I said, firming my voice when I saw him open his mouth to argue, “I will handle it one way or another. Sure I’ll miss you like hell but we’ll both make it through. I know it.” He smiled at me before pressing another kiss to my lips.

“You are amazing sometimes, you know that?” I rolled my eyes.

“Other way around, bud.”

“Uh, I beg to differ.” I shook my head as Matt resumed driving.

“It’s about fucking time you guys got here!” Zacky exclaimed when we finally arrived at the pier.

“Well we stopped because Matt was telling about you guys going on tour again,” I retorted coolly. He fell silent. “That’s what I thought.” I strode past him and the other guys and started making my way down the pier. The guys talked behind me, making plans for their trip. I smiled slightly.

I was happy that they’d continue touring, but it did make me sad that I was going to be away from Matt for awhile. Matt caught up to me, slipping his arm around my waist.

“Someone seems sad,” he murmured.

“A little,” I admitted. He gave me a brief squeeze.

“Don’t worry about it. Like you, we’ll make it through it. You’ll be fine.” I looked up at him and smiled.

“Yeah, I guess.” I glanced away, looking at the water.

“I’ll call you everyday. Even if it means having to get up in the middle of the night because it’s day time here.” I shook my head.

“You don’t have to. Sure, I’d like you to call but you don’t have to everyday.”

“Well I am so ha.” I rolled my eyes, smiling at his sweetness.