What True Love Is All About

She loved the way he made her feel. Even if he would never know about it, she still loved it. He always made her feel special, loved. But he would never know, because she would never tell him. She couldn't tell him.

And he loved the way she made him feel. She knew this. He told her as often as he could, as if he was trying to compensate for the lack of it from her side. When he was near her he felt like he owned the world. When he was near her, he felt that anything was possible.

They were both cuddled up on the couch in their apartment, watching a movie. She was trying to focus on the movie, but she was frustrated. More so than usual today. He noticed it now and paused the movie, then tapped her shoulder. She looked up at him, and he looked into her beautiful, deep blue eyes.

"Anything wrong, honey?" he asked slowly, and she sighed. "Come on, you can tell me." She looked down and shook her head. He wouldn't understand. No one would ever understand. He tapped her shoulder again and she looked up. "Babe, please. Tell me. I hate seeing you like this." he said softly and she sighed.

As she held up a finger, telling him to wait a minute before she stood up and grabbed the pen and pad from the small table next to the balcony door. She sat with the pad in her lap, her head spinning with all the thoughts she had, trying to find the right way to tell him how she feel. Then suddenly she got an idea and wrote down one simple sentence on the pad.

I hate this life.

He looked at the pad with wide eyes, worried that she was breaking up with him. He slowly looked at her, and her eyes were sad. But they weren't sad in that way, it was a deeper sadness. She then lifted her hand and touched her lips lightly, then brought it to her ear. He held her close to him, wanting never to let her go, wanting to make her realize that she is perfect the way she is.
Just then the door opened and the rest of the guys entered. They saw the two lovers, and somehow Nao knew at once what was bothering her. He looked at them and then placed his hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him and smiled at them.

"Hey. How are you?" he asked her and she nodded slowly, her eyes set on the floor, her sign for 'Not so well, but I'll live'. She figured Nao wanted to say something else, so she looked up at him again. "Is this a bad time?"

She shook her head and Hiroto smiled at them.

"Don't worry, she's just.. Having a hard time." Hiroto said softly, stroking her hair.

The guys nodded, and a few more words were exchanged between the guys. She wasn't aware of it though, as she was looking down at her feet, deep in thought. Hiroto noticed this, and it made him worry. The last time she was this deep in thought, not even trying to figure out what they were talking about, she had left him for six months.
He tapped her on the shoulder and she looked up at him with a small smile, then returned to the pad.

I'm fine. Just tired.

"Okay. Then maybe you should go to sleep soon?" Hiroto asked and she nodded.

She kissed him deeply, then waved good night to the guys before heading to the bedroom. She had the pad and pen with her, because she wanted to write down how she felt, but only for him to read.
When she was done she got ready for bed then crawled in under the covers. She faked sleeping, but she knew that she couldn't fall asleep until he was by her side.
About an hour later she could feel the wall and floor vibrate as the front door closed, and just a few minutes later the bedroom door opened and he stepped into the bedroom. He stopped at the door, looking at her 'sleeping' form for a while, a wide smile on his lips, before he got ready. But before he got into bed he noticed the pad, and the writing on it. He took it up and read it, sitting down on the bed.

Hiroto
I love you, more than I ever thought was ever possible. I know I wouldn't be able to live with you, those six months away from you were worse than hell for me. I am sorry that I can never tell you how I feel or hear your voice, I wish there was something I could do to hear your voice or just be able to tell you how I truly feel. I think I would do anything to be able to do that, if even for a day.
I wish I could tell you that I love you with my whole heart, that I want to grow old with you and that every second I'm without you is worse than hell for me. I wish I could tell you how you make me feel loved for the first time in my life, how you brighten up my every day, no matter how bad they've been.
I wish I could tell you all this, but I can't. So I guess I have to write it down for you instead. Like I write down everything else I tell you..

A tear fell on the paper, and he just looked at the text, feeling his heart swell over with love. Then he felt her arms wrap around his torso and she rested her head on his shoulder. He turned around and connected their lips. For once, he was the one who was speechless, he was the one without words. So he let the kiss speak for him. He put all of his emotion behind the kiss and slowly pushed her down on the bed. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him close and deepening the kiss, while his hands played with the hem of the top she was wearing. She smiled into the kiss, but then the need for air got too big and they pulled away slightly. Their lips still brushed against each other, and he smiled. He then kissed her again, while reaching for something in the drawer next to the bed. Something that had been there for over a year now. He deepened the kiss as he slipped the ring on her finger, and then she pulled away with a confused look at him. He chuckled and the turned on the bedside table light, so she could see him.

"Marry me." he said and she looked at the ring. Then she looked back at him, still confused and shocked. "I love you. More than anything. Marry me."

She nodded, tears spilling out of her eyes, and she hugged him tightly. His smile widened and she placed her hand on her heart then placed her hand on his heart with a soft smile on her lips. She was telling him she was his and his only, and somehow he understood that. He smiled at her before placing a soft kiss on her lips. When they broke away she grabbed the pad and flipped it to a new page.

Please tell me this isn't a dream.

She showed it to Hiroto and he smiled, stroking her hair slowly.

"No, it's not a dream." he said and kissed her lips softly. "If it is, then I'll be just as disappointed as you when we wake up."

She smiled and then wrapped her arms around his neck. They shared a deep kiss before they laid down next to one another, her head resting on his chest, feeling his heartbeat and breathing. Her hand was drawing small patterns on his chest as he ran a hand through her hair. He loved moment like this, just between the two of them.
She looked up at him though half-lidded eyes, half asleep already, and smiled. He smiled at her and kissed the top of her head before she drifted off to sleep, him following not far behind.

He might be a famous rockstar, but he has never felt love like this before.
She might be deaf and mute, but he doesn't care.
This is what true love is all about.