Suicidal Memories

Normal point of view

"Mommy! Mommy!", my son called with shining eyes.
"Yes short stuff?"
A smile took place of my lips as I picked him in my arms.
"Mommy is uncle Brian and uncle Johnny coming?"
I giggled at his enthusiasm and nodded smiling, "Yes sweetie they're coming. So is auntie Leanne."
He shrieked happily and ran to his room in a stumbly pace,
"Mommy come! Help me with my clothes!" He stared up at me giving a cute smile.
"You're getting so vain baby." I couldn't help but sigh, "Just like your father..."
"Okay mommy. Now clothes!"
I gave him a little smile and did so.
"Don't be so rushy baby, everything takes it's time."
Oh how i knew it...

Some hours later

"Come here short stuff", Johnny smiled at Aaron.
We couldn't help but chuckle.
"Look who's talking Johnnyboy", I grinned devily.
He rolled eyes and put a hand over my son's blue ones before flipping me off.
"I would so chop off your balls if you hadn't covered his eyes Johnny."
"Well I did so there's no need to."
Brian smirked, "Oh Johnny I could almost see you shivering when she said she'd chop you."
Johhny rolled his eyes once more getting a chuckle from Brian.

"Ladies I'm making a bet. I bet in how Aaron is gonna be taller than Johnny. Who's with me?"
Everybody raised hands but Johnny. And Aaron oblivious to it.
"God... you're mean to me."
Brian once again chuckled at his mate.
"C'mon Johnny don't take this personally but damn the kid's dad is quite a beast."
"Good point."

I left them busy with their convo and went towards the door hearing a knock.
"Oh hey James..."
My voice suddenly became lower.
"Hey."
I could feel his eyes burning straight thorugh mine.
"I didn't expect you to come over today..."
Each and every part of my body was turning into a nervous wreck. Unlike him. He simply stared.
"I know, I just felt like visiting my son. I think I have that right."
I nodded and stepped back to let him in.
Immediately Aaron came flying to his arms between excited screams of "Daddy, daddy you're here!"
James let out a small smile and pressed his lips to his son's forehead.
"Hey there. How's daddy's little monster been?"
"Good", he giggled.
Once again James smiled and hugged him close.

"Daddy, mommy said I'm getting like you." He smiled bigger.
"Oh really?"
James gaze turned to me, lingering there.
"Yesh, she said I-I'm...I'm vain! Vain like you daddy! What's that word daddy?"
James's soft gaze quickly changed to a glare.
I bit my lip so hard I wouldn't be surprised if it bled.
"Look James I didn't really-"
"You didn't really what?? Meant it??? You know you did."
"Please James I-"
"Whatever", his pretty face turned away from me, a mixture of hurt and anger plastered on it. "I'd appreciate if you didn't shit talked about me in front of my kid."
"James please I'm really sorry I-"
"Not."
And with that he made his way to the living room.

I stood still for a while with my head low. Tears streamed from the corner of my eyes as I raised it. Three pairs of eyes laid on me.
I heard Leanne's soft voice asking if I was okay. I simply shrugged and walked upstairs silently, tears falling down quickly and leaving wet traces on my cheeks.