Let's See What You're Not

Mark

“Emma?” I asked quietly as I tried to get her attention.

When I got to my locker I found her just standing there, staring into her one but not making any attempt to take anything out of it. It was like she was in some kind of trance or something.

“Em?” I asked again, slightly louder after she ignored me the first time.

She turned and faced me for a few seconds before putting her head back inside the locker. Those few seconds were long enough for me to realize that she was upset. Her eyes were all red and I was certain there were marks from where tears had dripped down her face. I’ve never seen Emma like this. Well, I have seen her cry before, but this time it’s different. We’re in school and she’s completely blocking me out.

I carefully wrapped my arms around her and twisted her body so that she now had her face buried into my chest. She was shaking. I didn't say anything at first; I wanted her to let it all out before we got onto that.

She was clinging onto me like she was desperate for me to be there with her. It’s so unlike Emma to get like this.

“Want to talk?” I asked her quietly.

She nodded her head and looked up at me with a small smile. It wasn't that obvious that she’d been crying, but her eyes and face were a little red.

“I’m alright now,” she sighed as she pushed away from me. “I just had to get that out, you know?”

“Yeah,” I whispered. I definitely understand feeling the need to cry over nothing; I do it all the time. “What happened?”

“Me and Shim... There was a little misunderstanding,” she told me nervously.

“What about?” I asked quickly, praying that it had nothing to do with me.

“Nothing like that,” she reassured me, guessing rightly about what I was thinking. She didn't want me to hear bad about Shim. I could tell from the way she was acting. She knew it’d hurt me. “He thought I called him thick,” she mumbled.

“Did you call him thick?”

“No,” she insisted. “In maths, he wasn't doing any of the work, right? So I started talking to him when I was done so he wasn't bored and so I’d feel less awkward.” I nodded at her, knowing that there’s a chance she’ll end up dragging this out a bit. “He blanked me like the ass he is, sorry but he is Mark, and then got a book out and started writing.”

“Well that was an interesting story,” I said sarcastically.

“Shut up,” she smirked at me with an evil look in her eyes. “I told him I didn't know he could write, but I didn't mean I thought he couldn’t, I meant I didn't know he could write poems or lyrics or whatever it was he was doing.”

“You expect me to believe Shimon Moore writes poetry?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.

“My point exactly! I had no idea he did so I was shocked and he took it the wrong way,” she told me before mumbling, “then he lost it...”

“Oh,” I whispered.

Emma can sometimes get worked up after confrontations or arguments; pretty much after anything that involves someone getting targeted really.

“It’s okay now though I guess,” she smiled softly.

“No it’s not Emma,” I said calmly. “What did he do?”

“Everyone knows about his temper Mark... It wasn't a big deal,” she mumbled. I knew she was lying to make me happy, but she shouldn’t have to. If I didn’t tell her about liking him last night, she’d probably be complaining a lot more now.

I like him and everything, but that’s not the point. I barely know him. Maybe it’s wrong to like someone like him... Maybe it’s wrong for me to think about him all the time. I think about his soft pink lips; his devilish smile; his adorable accent; the way he walks; the way his hand would feel in mine. There’s more than that though. I think about things I really shouldn’t allow myself to think about; not about him anyway.

“So he didn't hurt you?” I asked quietly.

“No,” she smiled. “I don’t think he’s the sort of person who’d hit a girl.”

“Not even you?” I laughed.

“Well...” she joked.

As long as he didn't hurt Emma, I'm fine. I shouldn’t be though, should I? He made my best friend cry.

***

PE is another one of those classes where I end up feeling really alone. In other lessons I'm alright without Emma being there with me, but in PE we have to work in partners and groups and I never have anyone to go with. I'm one of the kids that are always left at the end that someone ends up having to go with even though they don’t want to. I hate being that person.

I'm not the only loner in our group though. Shim’s in here as well. Somehow he always manages to get out of taking part. He either comes up with some fairly believable excuses, or he just doesn’t turn up at all.

Today he’s here though. I can see that he doesn’t have his kit so unless the teacher falls for another one of his little stories, he’s going to end up in the schools spare one. It won’t be pretty. No one wants to wear that thing.

I always get changed in the far corner of the room to try and avoid everyone else in there. Shim’s got the same idea except he stays in the opposite corner. The only problem with the whole corner tactic is that when you’re trapped in one, it’s pretty difficult to get out of it.

I’ve not experienced this before, but he has. Not many people like him here.

As I was getting changed I couldn’t help but glance over in Shimon’s direction occasionally. Something about him just intrigues me and he wasn't getting changed yet, so the reason wasn't because I was perverted even though I’d probably still watch if he was changing . Right now he’s just sitting there, staring at the box that has all of the horrible spare kit in it. I doubt he’ll get out of it today. They’re going to make him wear it.

I went back to focusing on getting my kit sorted out before turning back and realizing he’d moved. Pathetically I gave the room a quick glance around to try and find him. When I noticed where he was I couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for him. He was picking up the spare kit and most likely trying to work out if he has any chance of fitting into it. Shim’s a pretty slim guy but he’s really tall as well. I’ve got no idea if the kit will be alright for him or not.

Although I wanted to be the pervert I am and watch him change, I respectably looked away from him, knowing that if anyone caught onto what I was doing I’d have a lot of explaining to do.