Let's See What You're Not

Mark

Today I had music last, which was great because me and Emma ended up in the same class. Shim was in there too. In a way, I slightly wished that Emma wasn't there. I don’t mean that in some hateful way, don’t worry. It’s just, I feel awkward talking to Shim when Emma’s there because she knows how I feel about him. Plus they don’t get on. If Emma wasn't there, I’d most likely be sat with him. Seeing as she is, we’re together and he’s on his own though.

The class in quite small but it’s best that way. You get a lot more done when there are less people and it’s easier to get help from Mr. Telic this way too.

After a while Sir let us go off and practise on our own. Usually I’d love doing this, but I keep messing up and it’s ridiculously hard to concentrate. In less than an hour I’ll be leaving for the hockey game. No pressure. Yeah right, I'm as nervous as a virgin having sex for the first time... Not that I know what that’s like.

I told Casper I was up for playing and coach okayed it almost instantly. At least I know I'm wanted on the team this time. Maybe it’ll be fun.

“You’re pretty quiet today,” Emma smiled lightly at me as she put her bass down and took a break.

“Nerves,” I admitted. “If I screw up-”

“You won’t,” Emma interrupted confidently before making me budge up on my chair so she could sit with me.

“I might.”

“Stop being such a pessimist. You’ll do great,” she smirked. “Anyways, I’ll be there cheering you on so you have nothing to worry about. Got it?”

“Fine,” I smiled before whispering, “whatever you say.”

I looked over to the other side of the room and saw Shim just sat there with his guitar in hand, staring out the window. We’ve never been in the same music class before, that’s why I had no idea he played anything, but I expected him to do more than just sit there holding it. He looked so distracted, like he was in his own little world.

“Talk to him,” Emma whispered in my ear, making me jump.

I stared at her like she was insane.

“Just do it,” she pressed, pushing me off the chair.

“Fine,” I whispered unsurely.

What am I meant to say to him? Usually he starts the conversations and I just try and keep them going. God this is going to be so awkward. I'm so awkward. Then again, I’ll be talking to him, that’s a good thing, right?

Oh no I'm thinking too much.

“Erm, hey Shim,” I said quickly. I seriously hope that sounded English.

He stayed still, just staring out the window. I bit my lip and then sat down next to him.

“Hey,” I said again, this time he looked at me.

“What?” he whispered in the smallest voice I’ve ever heard him use.

“Are you okay?” I asked him out of concern.

When I came over, that wasn't one of the questions I planned on asking (yes I tried planning them) but the way he spoke then told me that something had to be bothering him. I'm just making sure he’s alright.

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I'm fine, Mark.”

HE SAID MY NAME! I mean, he’s fine... That’s good. He’s lying though. I know he is.

“Cool. Wanna come play with me and Emma? I'm drums, she’s bass, we could do with a guitar,” I offered, wanting to keep him company.

“I'm good here,” he told me in an even weaker voice.

“Please,” I said quickly. “We don’t bite.”

He smiled at little when I said that. Seeing him smile made me feel good inside.

“Go on then,” he said, locking eyes with me for a few seconds.

Wow.

Emma looked a little uneasy when she saw me walking back over with Shim. All I could do was hope that they’d behave around each other for the rest of this lesson. Surely that’s not too much to ask for.

“Hi Shim,” she said, sounding way over friendly. I couldn’t help smiling at that. “It’s great that you and Mark are friends, isn't it?”

He faced me with an unreadable expression on his face. Great. Well this is embarrassing.

“Maybe we can put aside our differences. We could be friends, maybe, right?” Emma continued.

“Friends?” Shim raised an eyebrow.

“I know you’re not used to that concept, but Mark’s my best friend, so if you two are close now we’ll have to start getting on.”

I stared down at the floor, wanting to just disappear. Emma’s trying to be nice, I get that, but Shim’s not going to understand. He’ll want to know what’s suddenly changed.

“Who said we’re close?” he asked, frowning at me.

“I didn’t,” I told him strongly, trying not to blush.

“I um, don’t mind,” he said quietly. He was acting so shy today...It’s kind of cute.

“Aww,” Emma grinned.

“Shudup,” I blushed.

She winked at me before picking up her bass.

“Best get banging Marky,” she laughed.

“Emma!” I gasped.

“Drums,” she smirked. “I was talking about the drums.”

I sat down behind the school kit and tried to see what Shim’s reaction to all of this was like. He seemed alright with everything. Yeah, he looked a little awkward, but he’s with people so that’s normal for someone as anti social as him.

When the bell went I remembered about the hockey game. I’ll be alright though. I’ve just got to keep my cool. I’ll be fine.

When we were walking out of the classroom, I started walking towards the changing rooms, which are in the opposite direction to the way I usually walk when I'm going home.

“Where you going?” Shim asked when he realized I turned the other way.

I grinned so much when he asked me that. He knows which way I usually walk!

“Casper wants me to play in the hockey match tonight,” I told him, still smiling like a freak.

“Hey, you could come watch with me if you want?” Emma suggested.

Wow, they’re still being nice to each other.

“Yeah,” I smiled. “I know you don’t like hockey but... Please?”

“I...um... C-Casper’s playing?” he asked me, suddenly looking uncomfortable again.

“He is but you don’t have to talk to him or anything. He’ll be on the pitch and you’ll be in the stands with Emma.”

“My mum and dad want me home,” he told us. “I’ve got to go.”

Just like that he rushed off the other way. I looked at Emma with an obviously hurt expression on my face.

“Don't worry about it.”