The Trouble of Taboo

I thought after last night I could never be close to a man, but Neil was driving me crazy, he made me want him and god what a feeling. When he’d picked me up and held me to him, I had gotten a strange sensation in the pit of my stomach, and it made me want him so much. I knew Neil was going to stop this before things got really steamy, but I didn’t want him to. It might be silly but seeing as the only times I’d had sex were not wanted by me, I felt as if this was my proper first time, and I wanted Neil to take it, and take it and take it.
We reached his room, and his lips had never left my neck, going up the stairs it had caused our hips to knock together, and I could feel him against me. If I hadn’t had any self control I would have been moaning like a whore, but I didn’t want Neil to think of me like that, like a child who couldn’t control her urges, even still I’d kept my hips grinding into his as we walked the landing space to his room. He kicked the door closed behind him, and placed me down on the bed, the first time we’d broken contact for a while and I looked straight into his eyes, they were ablaze with emotion and I couldn’t help but smile up at him as he stroked the side of my face, “You’re so beautiful” He whispered to me and I kissed his neck quickly, leaning up to his ear “But you’re hotter.” I told him giggling as I fell gently back against the bed. He’d smiled slightly at what I’d said, but when I started giggling, my chest heaving up and meeting his, and my leg automatically bending in between his legs, his eyes blazed up again and before I could register it my baddy shirt was off. I smiled slightly shyly up at him, but he wasn’t looking at my face anymore, my face blushed a deep red as I realised he was checking out my body. I pulled him closer to me, using his tie so his face came up to look up at mine. I tugged his tie free and pulled it off of him, smiling as his eyes locked onto my lips, which I was currently tugging at slightly with my teeth, as I focussed on undoing his shirt buttons. His lips crashed into mine as I tugged his shirt off of him, I leant up into the kiss wanting to be as close as possible to him, pushing my chest out so that it brushed up against his. I heard him moan and for the first time in a long while my brain stopped whirring around, I was totally focussed on Neil, on this amazing, lovely, sexy man on top of me, kissing me, wanting me; I couldn’t think of anything else even if I’d wanted to.
I gently pulled away after a bit, my breathing heavy and I leant back against Neil’s bed, my eyes locked onto his. I wasn’t sure what to do next, or what Neil wanted, so I followed my intuition and trailed a finger down his chest to his trouser line, following my finger with my eyes and noticing Neil doing the same. I gulped slightly, knowing I was way out of my depth and that Neil had many years of experience on me. I pulled Neil closer to me, using his trouser band to do so and his face snapped up to mine, “What are you doing?” He asked me, his voice husky and intrigued, as his eyes flicked between my lips and eyes. “What I want to do Mr Pearles.” I told him suddenly getting all of my confidence back and undid his trouser button and unzipped him, at that sound Neil seemed to be pulled out from a daze and pulled my hands away, holding them above my head with one of his, I pretended to struggle slightly, laughing as I did. In my head I realised it was a laugh I’d never heard come from my mouth, and Neil looked at me in pleasant surprise. “What’s wrong Mr Pearles, don’t you want me?” I asked him, my tongue tracing my lips as I did so. I saw him gulp slightly, and knew he was trying to keep himself in control. I leant up to him and kissed up his neck, loving the way he turned his neck to the side. I got to his ear and stopped for a second “Don’t over think things Neil, just follow your desires” I whispered, my mouth so close to his ear that the vibrations from my lips made him shiver slightly, I licked around his ear and then gently bit his neck, causing his hips to thrust against mine. I pulled back with my eyebrows arched and looked up at him. He smiled slightly at me, “I’m impressed.” He said and I shrugged nonchantly but my heart was doing backfilps inside of my chest, “But I’m not going to sleep with you Paige.” I frowned at him slightly, “Don’t look like that, I’m still going to take you for one hell of a ride.” He paused for a second or two, thinking about something “Well figuratively speaking, I’ll save the literal interpretation of that for another time.” He whispered to me. I’d been concentrating so hard on what he was saying, hanging onto his every last word that I hadn’t noticed he had gotten closer to me until I felt his breath of the last word against my lips, seconds before his lips came crashing down on mine.
He surprised me when he shifted a bit, and seemed to be rummaging in his drawer for something, my mind instantly jumped to condoms, and in that second I realised I wasn’t ready to have sex with him, I panicked slightly, trying to figure out how to tell him. When he pulled back from me to reveal what he had in his hands I breathed a sigh of relief, it was just some handcuffs, than my mind did a double take. “Just to stop you from trying to take the focus of yourself.” He looked at me and then leant closer “Paige, I told you I wasn’t going to have sex with you. I know you’re not ready for that.” I looked at him shocked, one for actually kind of liking the idea of him handcuffing me when yesterday I had hated being tied up, but I guess it was all to do with the person you were with and actually feeling something for that person, and secondly for him knowing what I was thinking. He kissed me gently and took advantage of the moment to handcuff me to his bed, “I know you so well.” He said and I laughed again, “God that laugh is so god damn sexy!” He said and I blushed slightly but kissed him again. I liked this side of him, it wasn’t much different from the teacher side of him, in control and such, but this was more than that, this was him being dominant and that excited me. He lifted me up quickly and put me back down again, and somehow in that quick motion he had undone my bra and pulled it off of me, “you’ve gotta teach me to do that sometime, it can be a pain trying to get them off” I said and then questioned why I had said that, or where it had come from, but Neil just laughed his sexy laugh and kissed my neck, nipping at it occasionally.
It was a few minutes before I realised he was moving down my neck, not up it like normal. He was kissing down my collarbone and it was at that point that I realised what he was about to do, of course he was already doing it and the shock sensation of his mouth caressing me made me moan without even having a chance to hold it back. I arched my chest up into his mouth, and one of his hands snaked around my back to support me, making me smile mid moan, even at this kind of time, he was still such a gentleman and so caring. I was so involved with what his mouth was doing that I didn’t notice his free hand tracing down my stomach and to my trousers, somehow until I felt air around my lower region I hadn’t realised he had managed to undo my belt and trousers and pushed them off of me. I looked at him as he pulled back from my breasts; I already felt on top of the world, what else could he do to me? More importantly if he did do anything else it was very likely that I would explode, the sensation in my stomach was getting that powerful, and I couldn’t see how it could be released without a mess of body bits everywhere, a strange thought to be having during the most pleasurable time of my life, but there it was.
I was pulled out of my thoughts and of Neil’s eyes when he placed me back down on the bed. I looked at him properly, and shivered slightly as he started to trace his fingers up and down my sides, I was amazed I wasn’t laughing as normally it would tickle me, but right then it seemed the “tickle” nerves had left and the over sensitive “drive me crazy” nerves were out to play. His eyes never left mine as his fingers started trailing further down my body, they seemed to rest at my hips as if he was still thinking things through, so I smiled assuredly at him, I wanted nothing more than to be able to stroke his face, but my hands were still a bit tied up. I leant up and kissed his cheek softly, noting that my almost naked body pressed against his topless body was a sensation that I didn’t think could ever be forgotten. I unwillingly took my body from his and leant back against the bed, mainly because the strain in my wrists from pulling against the handcuffs was starting to hurt a bit, that and they were starting to rub against my cuts, but I didn’t leave the warm contact of his body for long because he brought his body down to mine, his hips and legs off to one side, but his torso pushed up against mine. I smiled again, and wondered if I’d ever be able to stop smiling after this session with him. His hand had slipped in between my legs, and pushed my knickers to one side, still looking into my eyes he pushed his fingers inside of me, and for the first time in my life it felt so frigging good to have something in there. He kissed me gently; lovingly and right there and then I knew I’d never be able to not have Neil in my life.