Falling Out of Line

Kaitlyn knew how to throw a party. I don't think anybody was sober here, but Lewis and I never picked up a drink. I had to drive later, but I guess Lewis just didn't drink, which I was cool with. I never drank more than one beer in my life, which one of my many foster dads had let me try when I was 13. Honestly, they'll let anyone take care of children.

The house was packed with drunken, sex-crazed teens. In every corner of the house, somebody was humping and being humped, but by some miracle, Kaitlyn and her friends stood in the middle of the living room, untouched by guys. Kaitlyn spotted me instantly and signaled me to come over. I laced my fingers with Lewis's, and he looked up at me.

"What are you doing?" He asked me.
"Acting like a couple. Kaitlyn has to see us together."
"I know that, but you can't bring over there to her. I hate Kaitlyn."
"Relax, I'm only gonna talk to her for a minute."

I had only planned on coming to her party to make a couple's appearance with Lewis. Well, that and she hunted me down and begged me to go. But part of me was excited to finally be friends with the in-crowd. I wanted to have fun and dance. Lewis didn't seem as excited, in fact he looked as out of place as I felt back at home. I felt kind of bad. After all, he was right, I was using him. But he was still my best friend. He was the first person I met at Cranbrook, and I wasn't going to treat him badly or abandon him just because I was actually somewhat popular for once. I wanted him to enjoy himself too.

We went up to Kaitlyn and her crew. Kaitlyn grinned and gave me a hug. I noticed her outfit was way more revealing than her school uniform, but I tried not to stare because gay guys with boyfriends don't stare at a girl's boobs.

"Glad you could make it, Tyler."
"Me too."
"Unfortunately, this party is incredibly dull."
"It is?" I looked around at all the people having fun, confused. "It looks pretty crazy to me."
She laughed. "Oh Tyler, you are too kind. But this is definitely a snoozefest. Can't you see?" She looked around and pointed to the crowd. "Only the losers are having fun, no offense to them."
"None taken, I guess." I frowned.
"Oh, Tyler, you aren't a loser. You hang with us now." She looked at Lewis. "Aren't you going to introduce your boyfriend to your friends, Tyler?"
"You... already know Lewis."
"Well of course we know the school Lewis, but we don't know Tyler's new boyfriend Lewis."

I thought she was nuts, but maybe I was the crazy one here. Everyone else seemed to accept their actions as normal out in suburbia.

"Well, this is Lewis, my boyfriend." I held his hand. He was staring at the ground.
"And...?" Kaitlyn urged me to go on.
"Um... and... I think he's... cute?"

The girls giggled and I could feel my face burning. Lewis stayed quiet and kept his eyes on his expensive shoes.

"Well, why don't you and your cute boyfriend join us in a game?"
"Uh, sure."

She and her friends went to pull a bunch of guys and girls off the couch. They all sat down in a circle on the floor and Kaitlyn motioned for us to join them, so we sat.

"So, what are we playing?" One girl asked.
"Strip poker." A guy said before high-fiving another guy.
"No way am I losing fo you at strip poker. Besides, we don't have any cards." Kaitlyn said. "Let's play... Spin the Bottle."
"That's so middle school," The girl from before said.
"I'm not complaining," a guy said as he put his arm around her and she giggled.
"Alright, then it's settled." Kaitlyn grabbed an empty beer bottle from off the table behind her and set it in the middle of the floor. "Who goes first?"

Some guy grabbed the bottle and spun. It landed on a girl and they made out for a minute. The girl gigled and spun. After a while, it got to Kaitlyn. She spun, and it landed on me. My eyes widened. I couldn't see this as a good idea.

She laughed. "I think Tyler would rather kiss his boyfriend."
My eyes got even wider, if that was possible. "I-"
"I bet he gets enought of that in private." Kourtney said and a bunch of girls giggled.
"We wanna see!" Some girl shouted.
"Huh?"
"Yeah, Tyler. Kiss your boyfriend. It's no big deal, right?"

I looked at Lewis, but he was already staring at me, his face turning pink. I never thought we would have to kiss. This was going too far. Why did I even agree to play this game? God, am I stupid.

"W-we don't really like PDA." I said to Kaitlyn nervously.
"Oh come on, you two have been hugging and holding hands for weeks. A little kiss wouldn't hurt."
"But-"
"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" Kourtney started chanting, and soon it sounded like the whole house was ringing in my ears for us to kiss. I know Lewis is gay, but there was no way I was gonna kiss him.
"We're not gonna kiss in front of you guys."
"Tyler," Lewis started to speak, but Kaitlyn cut him off.
"I guess you two really aren't dating then."
"Of c-course we are."
"Then prove it."

I gulped. We weren't getting out of this.

"I knew it. Tyler's just faking it so Lewis the Loser could get in with the populars." Some jock said.
"What? That's not true!" Lewis said.
"Of course, little Lewis just had to weasle his way in. He's totally using Tyler."
"What?!" Lewis and I shouted.
"There's no way anybody would willingly date Lewis."

Ouch. That even hurt my feelings. I can't believe they were being so cruel. I knew he had it rough at school, but I didn't think they would harass him like that. I looked at Lewis, but it pretty much broke my heart. I could see that he was trying not to cry. I couldn't let them break him down like that.

I put my hands on either side of his face and made him look at me. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and moved in. My lips found his. Either the party died, or my heart was pumping so much blood into my ears that I couldn't hear anything - everything went quiet. I broke away as soon as possible, but still didn't open my eyes. The coo of girls that came a second later let me know that they believed us and found it cute. I think I muttered something about going to the bathroom before I jumped up and ran. I got lost trying to find the back door but settled on hiding out in the basement.

It must have been sound proof down here because I could barely hear the music playing upstairs. I saw a small kitchen area and rushed to find a fridge. I grabbed the first bottle I could find and downed it in a second. There wasn't a bad taste in my mouth, but I had to wash the very fact that I had kissed a guy out of my mind.

Five sodas (and a lot of belches) later, I saw a girl walk through a door I hadn't noticed before. She smiled at me.

"Are you hiding from the party, too?"
"Something like that." I said, finishing my soda.
She laughed and joined me near the fridge.

I offered her a soda, and then we sat on the couch together. She started talking to me but I was barely listening. My mind was elsewhere.

"So, you're pretty cute. Why are you hiding down here?"
I stared at her. She must not have been upstairs tonight. "I um... it's a long story. Why aren't you up there?"
"My sister banished me to the basement."
"Your sister? Wait, you're Kaitlyn's sister?"
"You know her? Wait, stupid question. I bet everybody knows Kaitlyn. Especially the guys. Not that I'm calling her a slut, or assuming you know her because you slept with her. God, she's gonna kill me."
I laughed. "I promise not to tell on you."
"Aren't you sweet? I should... thank you."

She closed her eyes and started moving in for a kiss. It should have been a reflex for me to do the same - a girl as hot as Kaitlyn wanting to kiss me, I'd be crazy not to. But... I didn't move. She opened her eyes and frowned.

"I... I'm sorry. I have to go."

I got up and made my way upstairs. The jeers and whistles started up as people recognized me, but I kept my head down and made my way to the car. I realized I had forgotten to get Lewis, but then I saw that he was already sitting in the car, waiting for me.

I opened the door and got behind the wheel. The awkwardness wasn't going anywhere.

"T-T-T-Tyler?"

I took a deep breath and started the car. We sat in silence as I drove him home. I didn't look at him, not even as he left the car and went inside his house. When I got home, the house was dark. I guess Sean and Cory went to bed early. I passed by the couch and heard a sleepy groan. My uncle rolled over on the couch, knocking his blanket off of him. I picked up the blanket and covered him, and I thought about my new family - nothing but gay men. Sure, they were nice people, but maybe I just wasn't meant to be apart of it. Or... maybe I was slowly becoming a part of it...

NO. I'm not becoming gay.

Either way, things are getting weird for me here. I never thought I'd be surrounded by so much... homosexuality. I've never even known any openly gay people before.

This is crazy. Things at the orphanage were never this complicated. Why can't I just fit in at any foster home?

It's stressful times like this that I wish I knew who my real parents were, just so I could figure out who I'm supposed to be like, who I'm supposed to fit in with.