Terrible Things

“You never really told me what happened to her.” Andrew said from the passenger seat. He was fifteen, with dark hair and light eyes. He looked like his mother.

“Does it matter?” Derek asked, not taking his eyes off the road. He’d aged well, Faye would have thought so. For a forty year old man, he looked good, better than most of the good ones did at that age.

“Yes, it matters. She was my mom, not just your wife. I didn’t get to know her, you did. And I’m old enough to get it, even if you think I’m not.” Andrew looked sideways at his father, whose hands were gripping the steering wheel a bit too hard, his jaw set a bit too firmly.

“What do you want to know?” He said after a moment of silence, turning his head around to look at his son for a fraction of a second.

“Everything.”

Derek sighed. “I was your age when I met her. She stood out a lot, I remember that. She - she wore clothes that nobody else wore, these super vintage dresses, and they looked really good on her, and her only. She was perfect in every way, you would have agreed with me if she wasn’t your mom. She was so different, but she was so right for me…it was crazy.”



“Um, excuse me?” A small voice echoed in Derek’s head, and he took a moment before looking up from the book he wasn’t actually reading.

“Uh, yeah?” he asked, his eyes meeting a kind, light green pair of orbs looking down at him.

“I, um, I couldn’t help but notice that you were kind of looking at me.” She smiled and sat down beside him. “Staring, actually. And just, you know, I’m Faye. You don’t have to stare, just come say hi next time, okay?”

Derek sat with his mouth hanging open stupidly for a much longer time than necessary. He shook his head a few times, and the nodded, and then closed his mouth, and Faye giggled and smiled at him.



“I fell in love with, that very day. And I know it sounds cheesy and you probably don’t want to hear about it, but I did, and I’ll always love her.” Derek wasn’t speaking quite loud enough, and Andrew turned off the car radio to hear him better. It was really quiet for a good few minutes, Andrew didn’t know if he should talk or if he should just wait.

“We were so in love, and our parents really doubted us, because we were only sixteen. But we spent years together, we never dated or hugged or kissed or had sex with anybody else, the entire time we were together, or before or after the fact. Sorry, I didn’t need to tell you that. But it’s true.”

Andrew smiled to himself. He hadn’t seen his father happy very much, and he looked happy right then, talking about Faye, the love of his life.

“I was 19 when I proposed to her. I wanted to marry her right away, but I wanted to move away from my parents first, so that they couldn’t bother us about it.”



They were sitting in the park when Derek decided it was the right time. He fumbled around in his pocket, pulling out the little black box and placing it in Faye’s lap.

She looked down at it suspiciously, then back up at Derek, smiling. She took the box and opened it, giggling and closing it again.

Derek leaned over and kissed her, right in the middle of the park, in the middle of the day, in the middle of Tallahassee. And people must have looked, because nobody could have possibly ever seen two people so in love.



“We did a lot of corny things. Like, we’d sit under bridges and talk for hours, or look at the stars and stuff. And we were so young, and so stupid, and even thought we knew something was wrong with her, she didn’t tell her parents and I didn’t tell mine, and we didn’t talk about it at all, not even when she would double over with these horrible stomach aches, she’d just tell me to ignore it.” Derek was talking really fast, tripping over his words, stuttering and sniffling.

“Dad, are you crying?” Andrew mumbled, sitting up and turning his whole torso to get a better look at his father.

“We were so fucking stupid.” Derek whispered.



“Faye, what the fuck is happening to you?” Derek shouted as he stormed in the hospital room, tears pouring down his cheeks. His breath caught in his throat when he got a look at her, and he blinked a few tears away before sitting beside her on her bed.

She cleared her throat and even dared to smile. She smiled really big, her dry lips cracking in the middle and bleeding. Derek wiped the little drop away and onto his jeans, cupping her cheek with his big hand.

“I’m sick, D. Real sick. I didn’t know, and now it’s too late. Doc told me I had eight weeks. He said that was pretty impressive, but it was probably because of my age. He said that at this stage, most patients wouldn’t live for more than four -”

“Why are you so calm?” Derek asked. “Aren’t you scared? Aren’t you fucking sad?”

“D, I’m gonna die in two months. I don’t have time to be sad or scared. I have a son, and a husband to take care of me, and I want to spend as much time with you two as I can.” Faye said softly.

Derek let another tear roll down his cheek, his hands trembling.

“Oh, Derek, please. Don’t be sad, try not to be, for me. Don’t be sad about it, just remember that you’re the best thing that ever happened in my life.” She whispered.

Derek was quiet for a long time. He and Faye looked at each other, not making any noise. It wasn’t awkward, it never was. So Derek leaned down and kissed her forehead, muttering a quick, “I love you,” as he pulled away.

The look in her eyes told him she felt that way too.



“She lived out her prognosis. Nine weeks, but for the last two she was basically in a coma, not really able to move or anything. I stayed with her the whole time she was in the hospital. The whole time, I was there with her, helping her through it. It broke my heart, too.” Derek was whispering again, afraid of crying in front of his son, something he’d never done before. “She died in her sleep. She didn’t feel anything, they had her on the best meds.”

Andrew was feeling sick. He hadn’t known how difficult this would be for his father to tell, or he wouldn’t have asked.

“Andy, promise me something. Just one thing,” Derek looked at Andrew until the boy nodded. “Don’t ever do what I did. Don’t put yourself in that kind of position, don’t make yourself that vulnerable. There’s too much to lose, it’s not worth it.”

“What isn’t worth it?”

“Falling in love. It’s such a waste of time, and energy, and I’ll never regret the years I spent with your mother, but I’ll never be as happy as I was when she was alive, and it was just us three.” Derek wiped at his eyes.

Andrew understood, just like he knew he would. And he didn’t know what to say, because there wasn’t really a right thing to say for that moment.
“Why are you telling me this, Dad?” He whispered, shaking his head.

“Because life throws some bad shit at you. It does absolutely terrible things. And I’m not going to lie to you about that.” Derek mumbled.

A small, salty tear rolled down Andrew’s cheek. “I love you, Dad.” He said.

His father smiled sadly and wiped his eyes. “I love you too, kid. Don’t forget that.”