The Kind Of Reckless

“Tore.”
I wipe away the tears from my eyes and look up at Kendall.
“Yeah?”
He sits down next to me, and puts an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into him. I rest my head on his shoulder and more tears fall.
“Just talk to him.”
I fiddle with the ring on my finger; the one Justin gave to me nearly five months ago. It’s loosened around my finger from the weight I’ve lost in the past month, from not eating like I should. I’m too sick to my stomach to.
“I hate seeing you like this. This is the second time you’ve let Justin get to you like this.”
“What else am I supposed to do?” I whisper, throaty and monotoned.
“You can be happy—“
“How can I be happy when the person I love won’t talk to me?” I snap, pulling away from him.
“You didn’t let me finish. You can be happy, or you could go out and do something crazy. I mean, after all, you’re seventeen. Isn’t there anything you wished you could do that you couldn’t until you were seventeen?”
I smile and the tears stop. I wipe away the stray ones from my cheeks and stand up.
“Well, there is one thing…”
***
I pull my shirt up to where it rests just beneath my breasts, but on my ribs.
“Out of all the things you could get done right now, you chose to get your belly button pierced?” Kendall snorts.
“Well, my mom said I couldn’t get it done until I was seventeen.”
He rolls his eyes.
“Well, after this, is there anything else you want to do?”
“Does it have to be something I couldn’t do until I was seventeen?”
“I guess not.”
“Okay. I know what I want to do then.”
The guy pierces my belly button, and it stings for a while, but finally dims into a numb pain by the time we get to the next place. Ken smiles when I tell him what I want.
“Perfect.”
I sit down in one of those chairs and the lady smiles.
“You’re Victoria Hart, right?” She asks.
I smile. “Yeah.”
“My daughter loves you. Would you mind an autograph and a picture?”
“Of course! I’d love to.”
“Oh, thank you! I’ll be right back to do your hair for you.”
Kendall bursts out laughing as the lady leaves.
“What?”
“I'm surprised she didn't recognize me, as well."
"Well, maybe her daughter doesn't like--"
“Aren't you Kendall from Big Time Rush?" The lady had come back with a pen and paper, and her phone.
He laughs, but nods. "Yeah, I am."
The lady takes a picture of Kendall and I together, and we sign the paper for the lady's daughter.
I write: “Don’t ever loose hope. Everything happens for a reason. Love, Torie Hart” and I put a heart at the end. Kendall signs it after me.
“Thank you so much.” The lady says.
“No problem.” I giggle.
“So what do you want to do with your hair?”
I sigh. “I want to cut it off. Well, not all of it, at least to my shoulders. And I want layers, a lot of layers. My bangs, too. I want them to drape across my forehead. And I want it to be blonde.”
I watch her in the mirror. Her eyes get wide, but she smiles, and starts chopping away.