Tell Me What To Do

They say everything happens for a reason, right? As I sat there across the table from my parents, with my little sister smiling at me sadly, the thought crossed my mind. It was another uncomfortable conversation we were having, with my parents pitted against me. Taylor wasn’t helping me, but she wasn’t taking their side either.

“I told you a million times, I don’t want to retire,” I sighed. It really did feel like the millionth time I had to say it. I was beginning to get irritated, and my leg bounced up and down under the table. I had brought my medical file, all of my tests results, and my game face to my childhood home, and prepared for the worst, and my parents didn’t disappoint me. My mom was close to tears, and for once in my life, my dad wasn’t shoving hockey down my throat.

“Sidney, what happens if you go down like that again?” my mom asked, and I ran my hand through my hair.

“What happened to me was a freak accident Mom,” I said quietly.

“Sure it was Sid. Just like Patches having his neck broken by Chara,” he started.

“That arena was old, it was a design error. He wouldn’t have hit that post any other way,” I sighed. This was the same argument he had been throwing me for the past week.

“Sidney, people have died playing hockey,” my mom whispered. I could hear the tears in her voice and I growled in agitation.

“Not in a long, long time Mom,” I said.

“Well do you want to be the first?” my dad asked, anger leaping into his voice. I looked up and his eyes were leaping with a fear driven anger. I shrunk down in my seat.

“No,” I croaked.

“Dad, Sid’s doctor said he’s healthy enough to play again,” Taylor said quietly.

“Stay out of this!” my dad barked, pointing a finger at her. She shrunk down in her chair, and I felt my cheeks flush with anger.

“Don’t yell at her! She’s right Dad. I was cleared to play, I’ve been going to full contact practices, and I’ve been working with the equipment guys to get the best helmet available,” I said, my own voice raising in volume.

“Helmets don’t always work Sidney!” he screamed, jumping up from his chair. I planted my hands on the table and shoved my chair back with my legs so violently that it toppled over. Taylor flinched, and ordinarily I would have felt bad, but I was so angry at this point that I didn’t care.

“IT’S MY LIFE DAD!” I screamed.

“YOU’RE MY SON!” he screamed back. I felt my heart sink as his words sunk in, and instead of saying anything else, I just picked up my chair and stormed out of the house.

“Sidney!” I heard my mom cry after me.

“Let him go Mom. He needs some time to think,” Taylor said quietly. I was suddenly thankful that I was in shorts, a tee-shirt, and my favorite pair of Reeboks, because I didn’t want to do anything but run. So run I did. I ran away from the house, and through the town. I ran until my legs felt like they were going to give, and then I ran some more. I didn’t stop running until I reached a little coffee shop looking over the harbor. I went in, dripping with sweat, and the barista standing at the counter looked at me like I had six heads.

“Can I have a small coffee, cream, no sugar?” I asked, leaning against the counter.

“Are you sure you don’t want water?” she asked. The way she said “water” made me raise my eyebrows. It sounded a lot like “wooder”.

“Actually, both sound good. Let’s go with both,” I said, the exhaustion finally hitting me. The barista chuckled and turned to get my order. It suddenly hit me that I had never seen her before. Cole Harbour wasn’t a small town, but I had known everyone that had worked at the coffee shop for years. She had long, curly, strawberry blonde hair that fell right underneath her shoulder blades. She was pretty short, probably about 5 foot 3 or so, and as she turned to hand me my coffee, I noticed that she had an incredibly pretty face too. She had full, perfectly symmetrical lips around sparkling, poker straight teeth. Her nose was small, and fit her face well. She had round cheeks, and freckles that dusted the bridge of her nose, and the tops of her cheeks right underneath the most incredible eyes I had ever seen. They were huge, jade green, and full of joy and intelligence. She smiled even more broadly, and pulled open the cooler next to her before placing my coffee and a bottle of water on the counter in front of the cash register.

“That’ll be three ninety six,” she said quietly. I stared at her for a second, and then nodded, pulling out my wallet.

“Thanks,” I said before picking up my drinks. She put the money in the register, and then opened her mouth like she was going to say something.

“What?” I asked with a smile.

“You look like you could use someone to talk to is all,” she said quietly. I raised my eyebrows, and then nodded slowly.

“You could say that,” I said. She glanced at the clock, and then walked out from behind the counter and took the seat across from me.

“You’ve come to the right coffee shop then,” she grinned. I was taken by her accent yet again. She said “coffee” like “cawfee”. She was definitely not Canadian, but I couldn’t put my tongue on it.

“Did I?” I asked. She nodded.

“Yeah. I have a reputation, especially with the high school kids around here, for giving good advice to people who don’t even know me. So, tell me what’s bothering you,” she said with a casual shrug. I bit my lip apprehensively but decided to tell her what had been happening in my life. For once in my life, I was glad to be able to talk to someone who obviously didn’t know who I was.