When It Became Over Powering
Through New Eyes
Ryan looked up from his hands and watched Emilia-Rose struggling to stay awake. Her eyes would shut then she’d suddenly sit up and re-focus on the TV, occasionally she’d glance over at Ryan and give a small awkward smile. He smiled at how innocent yet exciting it was, to just be here watching a movie with her; it reminded him of the old days, when Panic! at the Disco was in its early years. Everything was so new and exciting, even the most trivial thing was fascinating in their eyes; they were so young.
A small sigh escaped his lips, it seems it had been an eternity ago; it almost seemed unrealistic to have been so young and innocent. It felt like those days were just a distant memory now, it felt as though he had aged profusely since those days. He couldn’t even remember when the excitement and fascination had ended, when he had lost the ability to be happy without relying on being surrounded by people, alcohol, and meaningless sex. He had spent the majority of his adolescence trying to be better than his father and yet he had essentially become the man he felt so much anger towards. Ryan hated himself for thinking these things, he had to get out of here he had to go home. He got to his feet.
“Emilia thanks for opening the door. Thanks for um helping me put things in perspective it really helped. Thanks for letting me stay and watch TV with you.”
She focused on him and gave a small yawn, “no problem.”
Ryan scratched his chin he couldn’t think of a reason to leave, “it’s uh. . .it’s getting late. I should um- I should go.”
She looked at the wall clock then turned and gave him a skeptical look, but nodded and gave him a small smile, “okay.”
He licked his lips, uncomfortable with the silence. He watched as she began to stand.
“no, it’s fine I’ll see myself out.”
She gave a small nod and sat down getting comfortable.
Ryan once again licked his lips; he wasn’t sure how to ask what was on his mind without feeling pathetic. He already felt like Emilia-Rose was only being this kind to him because she pitied him. He shook the thought away and instead moved toward the door.
“um. . .bye.”
“Good-bye Ryan,” she said giving a small wave of her hand.
“Okay well. . .” he shut his eyes and forced himself to ask, “Is it okay if I come over again tomorrow?”
“Oh, umm my sister is coming tomorrow, but okay, sure maybe noon? You can have lunch with us.”
He nodded fervently, “yeah okay. I’ll see you then.”
He exited her home and slammed the door shut behind him. He walked down the stairs and out the door marked Employees only. He received and odd look from the girl whom was behind the counter. Ryan was so excited about lunch that he didn’t even care; he gave her a small wave before exiting
the book store.
He reached into his pockets and remembered he had been dropped off by Keltie. He smiled thankful that he knew he could still count on Keltie as a friend, and now he had a budding friendship with Emila-Rose. He set off towards his house on foot.
A small sigh escaped his lips, it seems it had been an eternity ago; it almost seemed unrealistic to have been so young and innocent. It felt like those days were just a distant memory now, it felt as though he had aged profusely since those days. He couldn’t even remember when the excitement and fascination had ended, when he had lost the ability to be happy without relying on being surrounded by people, alcohol, and meaningless sex. He had spent the majority of his adolescence trying to be better than his father and yet he had essentially become the man he felt so much anger towards. Ryan hated himself for thinking these things, he had to get out of here he had to go home. He got to his feet.
“Emilia thanks for opening the door. Thanks for um helping me put things in perspective it really helped. Thanks for letting me stay and watch TV with you.”
She focused on him and gave a small yawn, “no problem.”
Ryan scratched his chin he couldn’t think of a reason to leave, “it’s uh. . .it’s getting late. I should um- I should go.”
She looked at the wall clock then turned and gave him a skeptical look, but nodded and gave him a small smile, “okay.”
He licked his lips, uncomfortable with the silence. He watched as she began to stand.
“no, it’s fine I’ll see myself out.”
She gave a small nod and sat down getting comfortable.
Ryan once again licked his lips; he wasn’t sure how to ask what was on his mind without feeling pathetic. He already felt like Emilia-Rose was only being this kind to him because she pitied him. He shook the thought away and instead moved toward the door.
“um. . .bye.”
“Good-bye Ryan,” she said giving a small wave of her hand.
“Okay well. . .” he shut his eyes and forced himself to ask, “Is it okay if I come over again tomorrow?”
“Oh, umm my sister is coming tomorrow, but okay, sure maybe noon? You can have lunch with us.”
He nodded fervently, “yeah okay. I’ll see you then.”
He exited her home and slammed the door shut behind him. He walked down the stairs and out the door marked Employees only. He received and odd look from the girl whom was behind the counter. Ryan was so excited about lunch that he didn’t even care; he gave her a small wave before exiting
the book store.
He reached into his pockets and remembered he had been dropped off by Keltie. He smiled thankful that he knew he could still count on Keltie as a friend, and now he had a budding friendship with Emila-Rose. He set off towards his house on foot.
♠ ♠ ♠
to my lovely co-author,I know I cut it off before adding what we had discussed but I like the idea of it being a separate chapter.