Fall

I can still faintly remember that night – the last night that I would ever be face-to-face with John O’Callaghan again. I remember how he came into the room and tried to make amends. I remember getting pissed off and running to Ross for help. I remember him telling me to stay put, but I didn’t listen. I remember standing outside Shane’s old room and listening in to Ross and John’s arguments. I remember Ross standing up for me, and confessing that he loves me. And I remember waking up the next morning surrounded by white light and a soft hum of a machine.

That machine. That machine was the external sound of my heartbeat showing up on the monitor. The white light was the reflection of light on the white painted cinderblock walls, and the white machines surrounding me, along with the white sheets and hospital gown I was in. I felt helpless. There was an IV stuck in my left hand, and I remember cringing when I saw it there. I hated needles and seeing one stuck there for longer than a few seconds made me uneasy.

I woke up alone. There was no one there to welcome me back into reality, or no one to tell me how the hell I ended up here. I wanted to get up and walk around, but as I sat up I couldn’t move any further; I was sore and I was restricted by the dull pain. I had no choice but to stare at the paneled ceiling and wait for a nurse – or anyone to come in and check on me.

Luckily for me, that person was Jenny; who arrived in what felt like hours later, though in reality were mere minutes, clad in her pink floral nurse’s outfit. She explained everything to me. She explained that I was here because I passed out and fell down in the hallway, unconscious. She explained how Ross ran and woke her up in order to get me into the hospital faster. And how John had to carry me out to the car. And how the two of them fought about who got to sit with me in the back – which Jenny did and made the boys drive there. She explained that once we got there they got me into a room, hooked me up to oxygen, and then checked on my baby. She told me how scared both her sons looked and how they both still wouldn’t stop bickering, so she refused to let either of them come and see me – though I wasn’t much to look at, being unconscious and all. She then told me how she let each of the boys have their own time to come in and talk to me once things settled down. And how after John spent twenty minutes of rambling and telling me things I would never know or recall for the rest of my life, she told him he wasn’t allowed over her house anyone unless he calls first and gets an “okay”. And then, she told me how her stubborn son bit his lip and nodded, accepting the new rule.

I got out of the hospital two days later, and was visited by my Summer Set and My Girl Friday guys and Jess – The Maine’s boys weren’t allowed to come and see me; one of Jenny’s other rules for my health. I didn’t need any more stress, though I do miss seeing those boys. Once I was well enough I moved out of the O’Callaghan’s house.

And that’s where I am today, almost two years later. I’m living in an apartment in the middle of Phoenix, with my boys. We live in a two room apartment – that same apartment that my “baby shower” was at. If you couldn’t guess, I live with Justin Godsey and Ryan Steele. And even though they like eating Taco Bell with some Jack Daniels at the most random hours of the night and early morning, they’re pretty good roommates.

I’ve been occupying my time with finishing up school – I’ve been majoring in International Business, with a minor in English Literature, and hoping to get my teaching degree as a fall back. But other than the two days a week I spend at Arizona State University and taking care of my boys, I’m working part time as a waitress at the local Denny’s, and being the Manager for My Girl Friday as a pet project for one of my Business classes. And for fun I’ve been attempting to write articles for the school paper, but I just haven’t gotten to finish any, and I’ve been constantly taking pictures with the Nikon P500 that Justin and Ryan got me for my birthday last year.

“Okay, I really got to go now,” I said, pushing Justin away from me so I could get to class on time.

“No,” he whined, “Come back.” He rolled out of bed after me.

He encircled my waist from behind, holding me to him so I couldn’t move towards the bedroom door to make my getaway. “Justin, I really have to go,” I told him seriously.

He turned me around in his arms so I’d be face-to-face with him. He whispered, “I don’t want you to go.”

I couldn’t help the smile that widely spread across my lips. Just as Justin was about to press his thick pink lips against my own, Ryan barged in with our bundle of joy.

“Wake up call, Mommy Dearest!” Ryan yelled upon entering the room with Jay banging a metal pot and wooden spoon together imitating a bell, startling the both of us to the point where I nearly jumped four feet in the air.

“School time, Mo-me,” Jay told me as he dropped the pot and spoon and tried climbing up my leg.

I picked my son up and kissed his chubby little cheek, “Thank you, baby.” I turned to Justin and said, “Looks like you’re the only one who wants me to skip school today.”

Justin didn’t have time to respond because Jay point at him with his little finger, scolding him with a, “Bad.”

“Okay, Mommy really has to go now.” I gave Jay back to Ryan, his partner in crime lately, and kissed each one of my boys on the cheek before running out of the house with my heavy bag of books. It was not easy commuting. It takes me 10 minutes from the apartment to get to the Phoenix Campus, but unfortunately for me, the majority of my classes were in the Tempe Campus, which takes me a half an hour to get there on a good day. And of course, today was not a good day. There just had to be an accident the boulevard.

Once at the school I just went around in my normal routine of class after class after class in order to fit the whole semester in two days a week; Tuesday’s and Thursday’s. Oddly enough, today as I was getting coffee from one of the kiosk stands all around campus, I ran into Ross and his new girlfriend; I couldn’t remember her name.

“Nat?” I heard his familiar voice call my name, which was weird because I don’t really associate with other students outside of our classes.

I had to turn around to see who it was, because curiosity was getting the better of me. “Ro?” I couldn’t believe it was him; his short curly hair was now a little longer, his green eyes a little darker, his clothes mimicked his brother’s at that age, though Ross had a lot more plaid, and his family signature smirk and beautiful smile was ever-so present as always.

He left his girlfriend on the line to come and speak with me as I started slowing making my way to my next class. “So how’ve you been?”

“I’ve been pretty good actually, keeping busy, you know?”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. School’s been a bitch for me though. I don’t know why I ever chose polytech.”

I chuckled a little bit, “I don’t know either, bro. You’re crazy maybe?”

“I’m beginning to think so,” he agreed with a laugh of his own.

“Yeah..”

“How’s Justin?” he asked quietly.

“He’s good.”

“Okay, well it was nice talking to you but I gotta run,” he said as he started walking back to the coffee stand and his girlfriend. “Text me sometime when you’re free. I really miss you!”

“Yeah, I miss you too,” I called behind him but not that loud. I doubt he heard me, but he saw my nod a wave because he waved back at me with a bright, toothy smile.

I made my way to Accounting, sat down in my seat, took out my calculator, and tried to get lost in the simplicity and reliability of the numbers and put this odd encounter behind me.