Fall

“You’re late,” John Gomez said with a raise of his eyebrows as Justin and I made our way backstage, Jay bounding around in my arms. Getting to the venue took us much longer than expected, not because picking up the earplugs took forever, but getting Jay to settle down and stop bouncing around everywhere with excitement did.

“I know,” I said, answering him. “We had to go pick up Jay’s earplugs,” I added in order to crush any sexual fantasy that was running through his head about why we were late.

John ignored me and instead turned to talk to Jay. “What’s up little man?” he asked as he ruffled his hair, causing the boy to nuzzle himself in closer to me to hide his shy self.

“You remember Uncle John, don’t ya, Jay?” I asked my son, bouncing him in my arms in an attempt to silently tell him that, although John’s hair was a large curly mess that was attacking his head, Baby Gomez was not a monster, and he could look at him.

Jay just shook his head “no” against the skin of my neck.

“Well now you do,” I said, chuckling to myself at my son’s quick and sudden mood change. “You haven’t seen him since you were a little baby,” I added just so that Jay knew he met John before.

“You’re hairs are puffy,” Jay finally spoke as he pointed to the mess of black curls that John liked to call his hair.

“I’ve been telling him it’s time for a haircut for a while now, but he likes the C-Drew look,” Stephen said as he came in behind John. “Hey, Nat,” he said as he brushed by his brother to come and give me an awkward hug since Jay was in my arms and a kiss on the cheek. “Good to see you,” he smiled, looking between Justin and I.

Justin was just standing a little of ways away from where I was catching up with the Gomez brothers and talking to his friends and some of the other people who happened to be able to get backstage. I knew that he was letting us have our moment and didn’t want to interrupt with his bromance banter.

“You too,” I nodded to him also flashing him a sweet smile. I then turned to Jay to jog his memory on who I was talking to, “That’s Auntie Jess’s boyfriend, Uncle Stephen.”

Josh appeared out of nowhere like he usually does and corrected me, “Fiancée, actually.”

“What! Since when!?” I was utterly shocked. Out of all the people to get married, or engaged even, I would have never expected it to be Stephen and Jess. Hell, I still can’t even fathom that they’re dating, and have been dating for this long; well I guess with them spending all that time together in the band they have learned how to deal with one another, and I guess by that their love has grown much, much stronger. I’m happy for them, I really am, but I’m just – I can’t believe this is real life. And if Justin knew about this, I am going to slaughter him for not telling me.

“Last month. Epcot. Orlando, Florida. They were drinking around the globe,” Jobe filled me in, in nice short, key sentences.

I eyed Stephen down and asked him. “And you meant it?” I mean, knowing that they were drinking takes this whole thing to another level since I know first-handedly how these two can get when they’re drunk. I didn’t want it to be like one of those things were he’d regret it now that he’s sober.

“Yeah, of course,” he exclaimed like I was the crazy one here. “I love her.”

“He gave her a ring and everything,” John said with a smirk and everything.

“You bought a ring!?” I was even more shocked by this fact because it means it was premeditated and not just a fluke proposal.

Justin noticed me scream and my mouth hanging agape because he left whoever he was conversing with and came over to us. “I’ll just take this away from you so you two can chat,” he said as he took Jay out of my arms. “Say bye-bye to Mama,” he said to the boy, taking him by the wrist and having him wave bye to me. “We’re gonna go have some fun while she catches up with Uncle Stephen,” he told him before they both walked away.

“Yeah, I mean, I love her; and she said yes,” Stephen said, continuing our conversation. “So I guess I did something right,” he shrugged and then scratched the back of his head.

“You guess?” I questioned incredulously.

“Guess what?” Jess asked as she came over to us, only hearing the absolute latter of our conversation.

“You two are getting fucking married!?” I exclaimed, this time in pure happiness for the couple.

“Nice to see you too, Natalie,” she laughed, moving in to hug me. “How’s my nephew?” she asked, but didn’t wait for an answer because she added, “And yes, Stephen and I are getting married. And before you say anything; yes we’re engaged, but it’ll be a long engagement because neither of us are ready to stop our lives and plan this fucking thing.”

I smiled at her, “Well that’s good to hear.”

“I missed you,” she gushed, coming in to squeeze me tight once more.

I hugged her back just as strong. “I missed you too.”

“How’s Jay?” Jess asked as she pulled away.

“He’s good,” I responded. “He’s roaming around with Justin somewhere,” I shrugged, taking a quick glance around to see if they were anywhere in sight, but of course they weren’t. Sometimes it worries me when Justin takes him to go do something because he is much more lenient than I am when it comes to parenting and protecting the kid from things far out of his league and age range.

“He’s here?” I visibly saw her eyes light up with happiness and then falter right back down to uncertainty, which she justified with her next question, “Isn’t this like not a good place for a toddler?”

I rolled my eyes. At least someone else had the same thoughts as me. “Tell Godsey that,” I replied. “He conned me into it,” I added and she shook her head at me. “But in all fairness, he did buy Jay earplugs like the ones you guys wear on stage,” I added, defending the poor parenting decision on our parts.

“That’s good I guess.”

“So who else is playing besides you shitty people?” I asked her, sparking up another conversation out of my own personal curiosity.

“Um,” she responded hesitantly after she bit her lip. Jess never bites her lip, it’s just a habit she has when there’s something bad that she doesn’t want to tell you, though she’s going to tell you anyway because she feels compelled that you should know even if she regrets telling you it. If that makes any sense at all.

“What?” I asked quietly, afraid of what the answer may be. Though deep down I think I already know what’s about to come.

“The lineup is This Century, us, and, um, The Maine,” Stephen said for her, just as hesitant to say the latter as Jess was to tell me, his hand still knotting his fingers through his locks.
I stood there like a deer caught in the headlights.

He knew. Justin fucking knew who was playing tonight. And he damn well knew that there was no way in hell I was going to come out here if I knew that they were playing tonight too. And best of all he basically fucking made sure that I brought Jay. What the fuck was he trying to do here? Cause some major fucking drama?! If he wants some fucking drama then I sure as hell am going to give it to him later. Fucking Justin. And if I see that fucking bastard I’m probably going to rip off both boys balls and feed them to some fucking shark! I don’t care if there are no sharks in Arizona. I’ll find myself a fucking shark to feed them to.

Jess furrowed her eyebrows and questioned, “He didn’t tell you?” I could tell behind my anger that Jess was a little shocked by this; Justin and I were usually pretty honest with one another.

I shook my head “no” very slowly, still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that Justin, my son, John, and I are in some very close proximity tonight.

“Everything will be alright, Nat,” Stephen said, trying to cheer me up.

“Yeah and if that fucker tries to get to you, you have a whole team of buff guys ready to beat his ass,” Jess said confidently. “Okay, they really aren’t that buff, but there’s a shitload of guys waiting to beat that fucker down if he ever hurts you again, or even looks at you for that matter!” she added as the wheels turned in her head to correct her former statement.

“Just hang out in our dressing room or in the back of the crowd,” Stephen added trying to think of any solution to avoiding him.

“And don’t think about going home ‘cause I know that’s what’s running through your head right now,” Jess scolded me, wagging her finger my way. “You can’t run from everything, and we’ll keep you safe,” she told me. “Justin too,” she added, though right now I was not very happy with that boy. “We love you,” Jess whispered in my ear as she closed the distance to give me a reassuring hug.

“John knows,” I whispered very softly in her ear, my voice a little shaky to admit it.

“Everything will be fine,” she said confidently, rubbing my back after another tight squeeze.