Sequel: Happily Ever After
Status: Complete

Even Lovers Drown

Chapter 32

Feet rooted to the pavement, Blake stared after Saylor, half-heartedly watching the swing of her hips as she walked and her delicate slid into the van's front seat. She knew she shouldn't have rushed out of the bus to ask for Saylor's number. Her excitement over getting Saylor to talk was tarnished with the defeat. She hadn't been planning on going for her number, content with having talked to her for a moment. Then, she saw Saylor through the bus window walking under Davy's arm. The messy red hair and adorable green eyes that struck her from the distance filled her with the urge to talk to her more, even if she had to do it through text messaging and imagine Saylor's physical reactions. She had to try.

Though Saylor hadn't said "no," the answer had been clear in her silence. Blake wasn't shocked, fully prepared for failure, and she didn't regret trying. But the pain of rejection weighed heavy in her heart, overpowering the success she should have felt over talking to Saylor without being told to get lost.

Sighing, Blake turned and walked to the bus, deciding not to stand there watching the van depart like a puppy whose owner was driving away. One accidental glance out of the window and Saylor would catch her staring helplessly. Blake didn't need that. She would get labeled a stalker instead of a hopelessly crushing woman. Stalkers didn't seem to be Saylor's type, though she wasn't too sure what Saylor's type was.

She ascended the steps of the bus, door still open from her unexplained dash out. Nodding a greeting to the bus driver waiting patiently for her and ignoring the amused smile he sent her in return, Blake walked into the living area of the bus. Her friends were scattered around the space in their usual places. Andy sat in the dining booth, laptop opened, the schedule for the day pulled up. Sage and Hunter lounged on the couch, content watching Hayden start up one of their many video games and Reese make sure the game started without problems. And Blake needed to complete the normal, almost reassuring, scene. Grab a beer, flop onto Hunter and Sage's legs, and ignore their complaints while getting comfortable.

Intent on forgetting her fruitless request for Saylor's number, Blake walked to the kitchen where her beer waited. The bus door slid shut and the bus jerked to a start, only throwing off Blake's balance for a moment. She didn't tumble to the bus floor or grapple onto the nearest sturdy object to keep herself stable, used to the sporadic jerks of the bus after years of touring. She continued on her pursuit for mind-numbing beer.

"Is there a reason you ran off the bus to corner Saylor?" Andy asked.

Blake distracted her hunt momentarily to glance at Andy. He kept his eyes on his laptop, not bothering to give her a disapproving look. She was spared his stern gaze for the time being, which she was thankful for, but his statement had drawn the attention of the band members and that was more of a punishment than any of Andy's threats or looks.

"Did she say 'no' to something again?" Hayden joked, "Do I need to document this?"

"Don't worry about it," Blake said, yanking open the mini-fridge and grabbing a beer.

Cracking it open and taking a swig, she leaned against the counter. This must have been Andy's way of punishing her for going after Saylor. No threats, no glares, no reprimands, but bringing the band's attention to the fact that she, once again, was talking to Saylor. She wasn't in the mood for the teasing comments. She felt bad enough. All she wanted to do was forget her failure and try to keep her success in mind.

"Someone's cranky," Sage mumbled.

"She totally said 'no,'" Hayden added.

"What exactly did you ask her this time?" Hunter asked, his eyebrow cocked.

Reese gave Blake a small smile, sympathy radiating from his hazel eyes. The situation hurt her more than the rest of the band realized, but Reese knew. Somewhere during her interactions with Saylor, he had figured it out, the pieces falling together easily. Spending her lunch time talking to Saylor instead of talking with the other bands about the shows had to be a dead give away, especially after their talk last night.

"Give her a break, guys," Reese said.

"Why? Blake knows we're joking," Hunter said.

Each comment was a joke, she knew that. They were picking on her the way friends did. Nothing they said had malicious intent. But that didn't make reminders that she was failing miserably at getting closer to Saylor hurt any less.

She couldn't be upset with them for not understanding, though. In their eyes, she was going after Saylor to sleep with her. Up until yesterday, that had been her original plan. They didn't think Blake cared much about her failure, didn't realize that this had become more to her than sleeping with Saylor. This was her attempting to break her cycle of sleeping with groupies for the sake of, at least, getting to know Saylor and possibly taking their relationship to a level she had never reached, something she didn't know how to do.

"I don't think we're being very supportive," Reese said.

"You want us to be supportive of Blake trying to have sex with Saylor?" Hunter asked, "Seriously?"

"That's not very dad-like," Hayden said.

"This is different," Reese explained lamely.

As pathetic an explanation as it was, he was trying. Blake knew he wasn't going to revel what he picked up. And she hadn't really told him she liked Saylor, just asked questions that, when paired with her actions, lead him to his discovery. Saylor's name had been kept out of their conversation. He wouldn't risk making himself look like an idiot by claiming Blake liked someone if he didn't truly know.

"How is this different? Blake wants to have sex with a woman she doesn't know. Nothing new there," Sage said.

"Except Saylor's not falling into her bed." Hayden said.

"That's different and refreshing," Hunter finished

"Well, it's... Blake's... You guys don’t..." Reese floundered, searching for a good enough answer.

"Because I like her," Blake blurted, "It's different because I like her."

She couldn't keep watching Reese try to stick up for his own reasoning and she saw no point in keeping this a secret. They would find out eventually. There was no point in prolonging it.

Silence and shocked stares met Blake's admission. Even Andy pulled his gaze away from the ever-present laptop to stare at her. The sudden proclamation seemed to throw Reese off slightly, happiness mixing in with his bewilderment. He must not have been expecting her to be so willing to throw the information into the open.

"What?" Andy asked, breaking the hush that had covered them.

"You actually like her?" Sage asked.

"A little." Blake shrugged. "Maybe."

Could she really say she liked Saylor when she knew little to nothing about her? Saylor was attractive, a merch worker, and Davy's sister. She didn't like chocolate or Blake apparently, but she did like dogs and Italian food and egg and cheese biscuits with a side of hash browns. Her laugh and smile, things Blake hadn't seen much of till lunch, were pretty. Then, there were those frightened green eyes that continued to flit through her mind. She was scared. Of what, Blake wasn't sure, but she didn't enjoy being on the receiving end of that look.

"No way," Hayden laughed, "Blake has feelings for a woman that don't revolve around sex."

"This is a joke, right? Are we on TV?" Hunter asked.

"I think our little Blake is growing up," Reese said, pride radiating from his smile.

And Sage stared at her, lips parted, eyes swimming with conflicted emotions. Confusion, shock, disbelief, but no laughter, no happiness, no pride at Blake willing to be with a woman on a deeper level, even if it only ended in friendship. Her best friend of so many years didn't look the least bit supportive.

Blake sighed. "Go ahead. Tell me how hopeless it is, just like you did in high school."

The statement shook Sage out of whatever thoughts were consuming her, knocking the conflicted stare from her face. "I told you that in high school because I didn't like Ariel. You were way too good for her."

Sage had been right when she told her it wouldn't work out, that she was wasting her money and time on that girl. The whole thing left her feeling used, broken hearted, like an idiot for not listening to Sage's warning. Her opinion on the situation did matter, was possibly the most important. She wouldn't feed Blake sugar-coated lies to make her feel better about what she did.

"Do you think Saylor is better for me?"

"Saylor's different, Blake. She's been hurt."

"How do you know that?"

There couldn't have been more than a couple of sentences passed between Sage and Saylor since they met. Blake talked to her everyday. Sure, some of those times could have been considered harassment and she didn't always get very far, but she still talked to her everyday. So how did Sage decide Saylor had been hurt?

"I know what it's like to be so frightened of something or someone that the fear irrationally stretches out to everything around you. She's terrified of you for some reason and I don't think you asking to fool around with her did it."

The fear Blake knew was there never brought her directly to the conclusion that Saylor had been hurt. Sage's logic made sense, and Blake would readily accept it if it meant she hadn't done anything to cause the fear she saw.

"But she talked to me today," Blake said.

"Because she's trying to take steps to fix what's hurting her. And if you like her enough to be with her, you're going to have to help her through the rough spots," Sage said, "I think she could be good for you as long as both of you are willing to put in the work. But you have to know it won't be easy."

"Well, it was a lot of work to get you to be my friend. I think I can get Saylor to open up to that idea at the very least."

After all, becoming friends was better than tense acquaintances.
♠ ♠ ♠
I was supposed to post this yesterday, but, being that I have the memory of a goldfish, I forgot.
I was actually planning on doing an update yesterday and another today.
'Cause it's Christmas.
So I may end up doing a second update today.
A little later, after I've had more coffee.
Depends on how I feel, I guess.
And right now, I'm cranky as hell.
More coffee may or may not remedy that.
Thank you to Tori the Elf, AnimeLove, PinkRabbit.
And thank you to any new subscribers.
I hope you enjoyed.
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xoxo
Dakota Ray