Even Lovers Drown

The warning chime of the doorbell bounced off the walls of the apartment, its sudden noise causing Saylor to jump and disrupt her studies. Eyebrows drawn, she placed her binder on the coffee table amongst the rest of her study materials—textbooks decorated in vibrant highlighting, notebooks with messily written lecture notes, past tests from other students. The doorbell chimed again, the person on the other side impatient. Saylor shook her head and stood from the couch, grumbling under her breath as she walked to the door.

Whoever was on the other side was interrupting her study time. If she failed and got kicked out of the nursing program, she would have their head.

Without looking out the peephole, Saylor yanked the door open, prepared to give the disrupter of her study-driven mental state a piece of her mind. A bouquet of roses was shoved under her nose before she could comprehend who was standing in front of her, startling her. Dazed, she stared at the roses, their siren scent wafting around her.

The melodious chuckle she knew well berated her ears and pulled her attention away from the roses to the woman holding them. Silky black hair, captivating blue eyes, dazzling smile. Katie.

"Um." Saylor shifted from one foot to the other, running her hand through her hair and smiling nervously, the anger once coursing through her veins replaced with excited energy. In the calmest voice she could muster, she said, "Hey."

She almost cringed at the squeak in her voice, but Katie laughed, the sound circling Saylor and enchanting her. Katie looked down at the roses in her hand, then held them out. Saylor made no move to take them but stared into Katie's blue eyes, lost in their depths.

"I bought these for you," Katie said, smooth alto tone sending a shiver through Saylor's spine.

"Thanks," Saylor breathed. Pulling her eyes from Katie's, she gently took the bouquet, tender gaze brushing over the fragile red blooms. "These are beautiful."

"Just like you."

Shocked, Saylor snapped her eyes to Katie again, warmth clumsily flooding through her. But she didn't meet Katie's gorgeous blue eyes, didn't share the moment she was expecting. Katie's brows were drawn in concentration, her eyes studying Saylor's body. Not appraising but critiquing. Saylor fidgeted under the gaze, hoping Katie find nothing out of place, breath hiding in her lungs.

"I don't like those jeans," Katie said, "They make your thighs look like sausages."

Heart dropping to the pit of her stomach, Saylor forced a smile. The jeans, loose on her hips and decorated in a series of rips, were her favorite, a present from her half-brother. She thought they fit her nicely.

Katie's eyes met hers again, piercing her and making her ignore the rude comment. "You should go change before we leave."

The statement set off alarms in Saylor's head. "Leave?" she asked, "What are you talking about?"

Her plans for the evening consisted of studying till the early hours of the morning and binging on a mix of popcorn and Ramen noodles. An energy drink or two would be included somewhere in there. Leaving, though, wasn't happening till eight the next morning, when she would walk out looking like a little woodland creature to take her exam.

"I'm taking you out," Katie said and sent a disgusted look towards Saylor's clothing, "After you change."

"Taking me out?"

"Like a date. Dinner, a movie," Katie shrugged, "You know, the normal stuff."

Saylor's heart fluttered. A date. Katie, the woman she had been subtly giving hints to for a semester now, wanted to take her on a date. So she showed up at her door with roses unannounced. She probably forgot to ask during the English class they shared. Saylor didn't mind, she wasn't doing anything important.

Images of her heavily highlighted notes pushed their way past her Katie-enchanted mindset. Her giddy excitement dropped. She had to study. That was more important than a date.

"Katie, I can't go out tonight."

Anger flashed in Katie's treacherous blue eyes, but disappeared so quickly Saylor wasn't sure the emotion had even flitted across those enticing blue depths. Eerie calm rested on Katie's facial features.

"What do you mean you can't go out?"

"I have to study for my A and P test."

Advanced Human Anatomy and Physiology. Also called A and P, the bane of her existence, and the most time consuming class Saylor had ever had the displeasure of taking. The coursework wasn't hard, but the amount of studying Saylor had to do was ridiculous. With a test the next day, she couldn't take time off and expect to get the perfect score she desired.

"So I bought you roses, came all the way over here, and you won't take a couple hours off to go on a date with me?" Katie asked.

"Can't we go out tomorrow?" Saylor asked, "I can spend the whole day with you after my test."

She reached for Katie's hand, aching to initiate some connection between them, something small to show her interest. Before Saylor's fingers could graze the skin, Katie's delicate hand shifted out of the way. Cold blue eyes stared into her, forcing a dejected throb to her heart.

"I'm busy tomorrow." Katie's voice was flat.

"Katie—"

"Forget about it. I'll just cancel the reservations."

"Reservations?"

"At the Italian place you like downtown. I wanted to make sure we could get in before the movie. Guess it doesn't matter now."

A surprise bouquet of roses, reservations to her favorite restaurant, a movie later that would allow them to share a romantic moment she would never forget, and Saylor was declining. She could slap herself.

"I'll go," Saylor blurted.

Studying could wait a few hours. She had been hoping for Katie to ask her out too long to turn her down over one test. Her grade wouldn't suffer. Not badly. She hoped it wouldn't.

Light returned to Katie's eyes and the perfect smile spread on her face. She took Saylor's hand gently in hers. Saylor's skin tingled at the touch, her heart raced, and she was sure the heat rushing to her face was making her cheeks pink.

She made the right choice.

Saylor snapped her eyes open, a gasp caught in her throat, panic escalating her heartbeat. Scenery buzzed passed the passenger window, a reminder as to where she was. Her panic calmed at the unfamiliar sights outside. It had just been a dream, a nightmare of their beginning, a memory she had long since repressed. She wasn't in her sophomore year of college about to make the stupidest decision of her life. She was on tour with Davy. She was away.

She turned her head from the window, eyes scanning the van to reassure her mind that she was out of harm's way. Davy was still in the driver's seat, one hand on the steering wheel, the other holding a fast food cup to his lips. He bobbed his head to the low music drifting from the radio. The two girls chattered in the back seat, wrapped in a conversation Saylor didn't take the time to decipher. The scent of food was heavy in the small quarters, and Saylor's stomach ached to be filled with the sustenance.

Davy glanced in her direction, pulling his eyes away from the road long enough to note she was awake, and looked back at the road. "You okay?" he asked.

Her mild panic couldn't have been obvious. There was no way. Her face muscles felt relaxed, her heart was beating normally, her stomach only begged for food, her body didn't suffer from the post-nightmare jitters she was used to. But he could tell from one glance that she was off. Years apart and he could still read her.

"Yeah, fine," Saylor mumbled.

His eyebrow rose, but he didn't push her to tell him the truth. With the two girls awake and close by, he wasn't going to push her to say anything she couldn't say around them.

"We picked up food while you were asleep." He nodded toward a bag perched in between their seats. "I know about your love for egg and cheese biscuits and your secret love affair with hash browns."

Saylor snatched the bag from its resting place and opened it. Her favorite breakfast food items tickled her nose with their aroma, pleasing her sense of smell and sending a pang to her stomach. She groaned.

"I could kiss you right now."

"Ew, cooties." He accented his childish remark with a loud slurp from his drink. Content sigh escaping his lips, he mumbled, "I'm a whore for a good orange soda."

"I thought you were a whore for Andy." Saylor couldn't tell which girl's giggling voice it was, but knew that the other approved of the comment with her own giggle.

Davy glared at the girl through the rearview mirror. "I'll kick you out of this van."

"That's fine. I'll bunk with Blake."

"Can I squeeze in with you?" the other girl asked. "I can cuddle against her perfect ass."

The pair dissolved into a fit of giggles. Blake, the blonde woman who sent Saylor into a brief trip down memory lane, was charismatic enough to send the girls into giggling messes. The same effect Katie had on Saylor years ago. It shouldn't have mattered, shouldn't have struck a chord somewhere in Saylor's heart, but it did. And Saylor knew she needed to steer clear of Blake for the sake of her barely intact sanity.