Thicker Than Water

I really didn’t want to go to this party. I wasn’t dragged to it or anything; I just didn’t want to go. I forced myself to go, but seventeen offers a strange sense of freedom while still being tethered to the restraints of home rule and underage laws. At seventeen you can drive and get a job, but you’re not taken seriously yet. I used to hate that, but now I see the bright side: you’re not fully punished. At seventeen cops give you warnings, and even if you’ve seriously fucked up, you’re usually not tried as an adult. What does that mean? Juvie for a few weekends.

I really just wanted to stay home and watch Criminal Minds with my mom; that Derek Morgan is lava hot. That’s what I did on Friday night. Chelsea couldn’t go to the party, and I wasn’t about to get myself stuck in a place where I know maybe two people who aren’t even my friends. But tonight, Monday night, she could go. So we carpooled over to Ezra’s house; I drove, so Chelsea was going to cover both of our booze taxes. It was a pretty fair trade since I had no money, but I did have a full tank.

Ezra’s house is like Grimmauld Place; it’s difficult to even see her fence from the street, even though it’s literally right there. We knocked twice on her front door before letting ourselves in; we walked up the stairs leading to her room. Not a single thing could be heard or smelt from the first floor or even the majority of the stairs, but the second my foot hit the halfway point in her hallway was the second everything came to life. Chelsea tossed her backpack of our morning stuff onto Ezra’s bed and walked up to her while I walked over to Tanner. He jumped off of his seat and hugged me.

“It’s been so long since I’ve seen you!”

I laughed, “I know! Your independent study is really cutting into our bonding time.”

He laughed and let me go. “Did you call a sleeping spot with Ezra yet?”

For whatever silly reason, his question flustered me. I mumbled something to him and then walked over to Ezra. She smiled at me and said, “Hey, you staying the night?”

“Yeah,” I smiled, “Can I call a sofa?”

“Sure.”

“Thanks.” I flashed a tight-lipped, nervous smile at her and then walked back over to Tanner. We caught up about the last six months of our lives before I sighed while looking at Ezra.

He raised a brow while popping off the top of a Smirnoff. “What?”

“Nothing,” I grabbed a Smirnoff and then said, “She’s just so damn pretty. If I could, I’d put her in a museum and stare at her all day.”

Tanner laughed and agreed.

I twisted the top of the bottle off, took a sip, and then sat down in one of the two chairs behind us. He sat in the chair next to me and waited for me to say something. I looked back over at Ezra before telling him, “I’ve accepted my gayness.”

He nodded.

I laughed, “I’m only like… 85 percent gay. Some guys are still fuckable, you know?”

Tanner laughed, “I suppose so.”

I laughed, chugged most of the Smirnoff, and then looked at him with a goofy smirk. “I’ve missed you.”

He grabbed us both another Smirnoff, but this time the mango flavor. He handed me one and then said, “Good thing the night has just begun then.”

I laughed, drank the rest of my original Smirnoff, and then slowly started the mango.

People flooded Ezra’s room; people came and people left, but mostly, people stayed and laughed with us. We got rid of most of the chairs and sat around on the floor. I drunkenly watched Tanner roll a joint before he, Georgia and I started to take hits. I didn’t really feel any different, even when it was just a tiny roach and therefore basically unsmokeable, so I just stayed seated and watched as people came back.

Jake stumbled into the room with an extremely freaked out Matt behind him. Jake saw Tanner and I by the window and plopped down – well, tripped and somehow landed on his ass – across from us. He laughed and then said, “We, we just went to Safeway.”

Tanner nodded, not really caring.

“And there was this hobo.”

Georgia yawned.

“And we smoked pot with him.”

I laughed, but the other two didn’t seem to care, so Jake laid down and watched the world as if he were on the ceiling. My exboyfriend wandered around with his friend, Cody, the one who was actually invited to all of this, while I spotted Yuta. I elbowed Tanner and then asked him, “Where’s Yuta pants?”

Tanner looked over and started to laugh.

Georgia smirked and shouted above the music, “Bro! Where are your pants?”

Yuta rushed over to us and stared at us with wide eyes, “I don’t know!”

Tanner jumped up, “Let’s find’em! You can’t run around pantsless, especially since Jake probably led a bum back here.”

Georgia and I laughed while watching the rest of the people. A couple of people were engaged in beer pong, others were passing a pipe back and forth, and the rest were casually drinking. But there was just something about the room. The mix of rap and indie music, the lights that colored the room red or black, the look of all the people…

Youth. I have mine. I’ll have it for a few years; I’ve had it for a few years. But I haven’t started using it before tonight. And… and for whatever reason, watching these people seemed like the memories I’m supposed to have. The huge house parties on Gossip Girl didn’t really exist in the world of teen parties. I’ll probably never see some intoxicated jackass jump off the balcony and onto the couch in a pool. But, at that moment, staring at the people laughing under the red lights, everything felt alive. Alive, but slow motion. Alive, but behind a glass wall. Alive, but not my moment. I wasn’t about to take someone else’s moment.

I struggled to balance once I got up. The air was foggy and thick with belches and pot-coughs. Everything was too hot. The air. The floor. The furniture. The cups. Even my skin felt like it could start melting. If nothing else, the smell of Smirnoff and Jack was going to make me sick if I didn't get out soon. I looked down at Georgia and said, “You wanna go outside? Get some air?”

She nodded and slowly stood up. We hooked at the elbow and used each other for balance while we left Ezra’s room. Georgia grabbed a large bottle of Jack with her free hand while we stumbled through the string of beads hanging in Ezra’s doorway. We smashed ourselves against the wall and slowly walked down the stairs, careful not to fall off and die since there wasn’t a railing. We made it to the bottom without and scratches, but ended up tripping out the front door and into her yard. We laughed at how pathetic we looked and found a spot against Ezra’s fence to rest against.

Georgia took a few sips out of the bottle before looking at me. She laughed and said, “Your ex is getting hella fucked up.”

I snatched the bottle away, “And we aren’t?”

She smirked and laughed, “We, my love, have a tolerance built up. He does not, but he’s drinking like tonight’s’ the last night he’ll ever see.”

I chugged some Jack before resting my head against the cold, stone fence. I stared up at the night sky; we quietly looked at all the stars before I whispered, “If I knew that tonight was my last night, I would have stayed relatively sober.”

Georgia took the bottle away from me, “Why?”

I turned my head to the left to look at her. Her wavy black hair was a mess; it was frizzy, and numerous clumps of hair were settled on areas they didn’t belong. She had random pony tails and a pair of glasses that weren’t hers. Her eyes were tired and glazed, but her mouth was set in a permanent smirk of pure enjoyment. I couldn’t see any lines around her mouth; it was like someone just glued a pair of ceramic lips on her face. I laughed at her and then took another sip. “Because I would want to remember enjoying my mortality.”

Georgia looked at me and then looked at her watch. “Would you want to remember Aqua Teen Hunger Force?”

I laughed and slowly stood up. We stumbled back into the house, but we didn’t go back upstairs. Tanner crashed on the tiny sofa instead of the larger couch, so we just took the larger couch. We awkwardly sat against the same arm together while zoning out to Adult Swim. I started to fall asleep, but Georgia’s laughter woke me. I saw my ex-boyfriend’s legs in the doorway; Georgia and I got up and saw that he just barely made the patio before pissing his pants. I fell down with laughter; Nathan had to plop me back on the couch before he and Chris dragged my ex back into the house. They got him into the kitchen – right before the bathroom – before he collapsed and puked all over himself. It was so disgusting that Tanner was stirred awake. He looked over at me with squinty, tired eyes.

“Wha’s happ’in?”

I sighed with happiness at the sound of Tanner’s drunken accent before looking at him. “We got ourselves a puker.”

Tanner groaned and rolled off of the small sofa. He slowly walked to the door; the stench sobered him up a bit. He gagged and slammed the door close before shouting, “Who let him drink that much?”

I quickly shrugged and then asked, “Did Yuta find his pants?”

Tanner nodded, “They were in the washing machine. He puked on them, so Ezra washed them for him. He’s sleeping by the dryer now.”

I chuckled.

Georgia resituated herself while Tanner walked back over to the small sofa. We slowly fell asleep during the airing of Squidbilies, but the sound of Cody coming down from Ezra’s room woke us up. He looked at me, so I pointed to the closed down to the kitchen. He nodded.

Georgia shook me away and whispered, “You want something to remember?”

I laughed and sat up. Cody sighed and then opened the door. Unlike the others, he didn’t gag or slam it shut. He shook his head from left to right and said, “Bro…”

Georgia smirked again.

I stared over at the scene. He didn’t originally puke on himself, but he did roll into it, making him puke again; it was a vicious cycle. Half of his body was on the floor, the other half was somehow stable on the sea of yellow and orange vomit. Watery, chunky, I couldn't really tell. The stench of what he ate today combined with all the drinks from tonight not only blinded me, but drowned out any pity I had for him. I was considering helping him when I was a little more sober, or at least leaving the door a little open so we could stop him from choking, but holy shit did it smell bad. And he did have sex with my neighbor... Fuck him, I'm not going to nurse him back to health. Good thing Cody didn't leave yet.

I was brought back to the moment when he looked up at Cody and slurred, “I’s ev’ry where.”

Cody laughed, “Well, your face is still relatively clean. You just rolled your stomach in it.”

He smiled, and then he puked again.

“CODY!” Tanner barked, “CLOSE THAT FUCKIN’ DOOR.”

Cody sighed and slammed the door shut.

Georgia and I laughed, and then we continued watching Squidbilies. I turned my head to look at Georgia.

She looked at me.

“Would you ever clean me up?”

“Wha’?”

I coughed in my elbow before looking at her again, “If I pissed my pants and puked all over myself, would you take care of me?”

Georgia smirked, the ceramic lips making a mark on her face.

I nodded.

“No, but I’ll wipe your face and get Tanner.”

I laughed.