Six Feet Under the Stars

Prodding Jack's immobile form with the tip of my worn Chuck Taylor's, he let out a long snore and shifted admist dreams to make himself more comfortable on the what was supposed to be my bed.

The sun was almost peaking above the Seattle skyline running through the spaces between the buildings like golden veins which almost guaranteed a futile night's sleep. Groaning in frustration, I kicked Jack harder in the knee cap and he shot awake with a start. "What'sgoingonhere?" Confusion slurred his words together in a jumble reminiscent of Mush Mouth's dialect.

"Wake up, Jackie." I cooed like a mother pigeon, holding back a laugh. "Rise and shine."

"Ten more minutes." Drool hung precariously from the corner of his mouth.

"Nope." Grinning, I sat on his legs hoping it would be an incentive to start the day. For the morning, I was entirely too perky and I hadn't even had any coffee in my system yet. Sighing, I accused him of the most heinous crime, "You're boring, Jack. You're about to make me fall asleep."

Rubbing his sleep-crusty eyes, he forcibly pulled himself from dreams of sugar plums and faires, "Don't want you to have a coronary."

"Sorry." My cheeky smile indicated I wasn't sorry at all.

"What's time is it?" His eyes searched fruitlessly for a clock around the modern styled hotel room. Everything was foreign and sterile in the band member's opinion. Too many clean lines and metallic accessories. Even the triangle shaped pillows made him raise a curious eyebrow.

"Mmm... Probably a little after five in the morning." I told him playing with the cuff of his jeans absently.

"Why the hell are you waking me up?" Jack questioned with a mock stern expression. His words were a little lethargic and he struggled to sit up. It was as if the lower half of his body was submerged in quicksand. "You're on my legs."

"I know."

"Are you going to move?" asked Jack with a skeptical expression as if he knew my answer before I said anything.

"Thinking about it. I'm kind of comfortable the way I am though."

Without further comment, Jack tilted his legs up from under me without warning and I fell back in between the crook of the sofa and its cushion with a small gasp of surprise. Fighting back with quick thinking, I stretched his legs at an extreme angle in the air and heard a sharp cry of shock eminate from his mouth. "Damn it, Melanie." He laughed airily.

After a struggle, I slackened my hold on his leg and it escaped from my grasp. Jack reacted by snagging me around the waist as I tried to make a hasty retreat from the battle. My body pressed up against his body, my back glued to his chest. Our legs entangled like spaghetti noodles down the entire length of the cramped couch.

Jack managed to wrestle me down, pinning me face up on the couch as he half-strattled me with a triumphant grin strewn about his face. Nearly panting, both of us were slightly out of breath from the playful tussle. The ends of his hair were close enough to tickle my nose as he spoke, "Looks like I win this round."

With a smirk, I slanted my eyes upwards to meet Jack's intent gaze. "You got lucky."

"Luck?" Bending down lower, he scoffed quietly. Jack was so close to me that he only had to whisper the words for me to hear. "That was all my skills, honey."

After my laughter faded and Jack continued to lean down on me, the atmosphere shifted from playful and friendly to the realization that this contact was technically innappropriate; Alex was Jack's best friend as well as someone I had basically dated, not to mention slept with.

Biting his bottom lip firmly, Jack still didn't climb off of me though indecision was clear in his puppy dog eyes. He was only a mere centimeter from me and that I estimated that his eyelashes would dust against my skin if he so much as blinked. The position we were wedged in felt too intimate, too sexual. Both of us were compressed into each other like an aerosol can. I wiggled my body under his muscular frame to break the spell, "Maybe we should..."

"Yeah." Jack gave a sharp nod of agreement.

Carefully disentangling his limbs from mine like a game of Operation, Jack sat up next to me and we kept a cautious no-touch space between us. A blonde weather woman cheerfully predicted thunderstorms as we faced the television in a strange parody of the American family. We shifted awkwardly and cleared our throats as if that would help eradicate the weird bubble surrounding the two of us. It didn't.

Shoving any idea involving lamely commentary about the weather to break the ice, I mechanically stood up and went into the kitchen to find some coffee. It just seemed like a mundane task for rising hours. Almost as trite as a rooster crowing. Maybe the caffeine would keep the insanity in check for the day. After a quick cabinet search, I was more than a little pissed to find an empty carton of hazelnut beans courtesy of the previous guests obviously had been coffee addicts.

My second morning beverage choice was green tea and thankfully the canister unhelpfully marked 'Cookies' held a fully stocked pack. I brewed enough for two cups and despite some hesitation, I invited Jack to join me out on the balcony to watch the sunrise. For a few minutes, I watched the sun ink the sky in hues of red and yellow alone while sipping carefully on the steaming liquid. Despite my carefulness, the tip of my tongue had the lingering feel of a burn.

For a while I thought Jack wouldn't come out with me but sure enough he slid the glass door open and stepped onto the concrete balcony barefoot. The morning was filled with dew and the type of thick moisture in the air when it rains too many days in a row. The city looked peaceful standing strong and tall in the morning light as rain drizzled in lazy sheets against the concrete. The patters of rain reflected in the windows of the business skyscrapers like wet fingerprints and the distant sound of car traffic drifted up onto the high hotel floor.

"For me?" Jack questioned indicating the plain white mug steaming on the edge of the railing. The cup was the only thing separating us from the city.

Slowly, I nodded, "Thoughtful, right?"

Jack laughed while watching the steam rise and fold over itself in twists and swirls. It was like the smoke had forgotten how to fly. "You really are the best. Man, it feels so nice and refreshing out here with the breeze and the rain."

"Is it messed up that I kind of want to free fall off of this?" My hands shook the sturdy railing, testing its strength. Raindrops peeled away from the metal and coated my palms in a slick coating. "Not suicide or anything. I just think it'd be fun to fly down."

Tilting his head to the side, Jack raised an eyebrow while taking a gulp of green tea chilled from resting out in the breezy morning. "Are you high?"

I chuckled loudly into the gray dawn and had the irrational fear that my laugh would float on forever throughout the city. "Not today."

"Well, I suggest you go skydiving or something like that. Jumping off of a twenty story hotel probably isn't the best idea. It'd work out okay until you hit the ground." He spoke quite diplomatically while running an absentminded hand through rumpled hair.

"I'll look in to it." Wistfully, I examined the bottom of my tea mug where remnants of tea leaves stuck to the white plastic printing free-form designs like a henna tattoo.

Tapping his temple as a perfect example of Whinnie the Pooh's repetitive think-chant, Jack tried to remember back before his brief slumber but his short term memory seemed a little fried this early in the morning. "Did you ever talk to Alex? I can't remember."

"You're getting old." I joked lightly, obviously passing over his question about his bandmate. There was a lot to that conversation I still had digest: Caitlyn's planned visit, Alex's frazzled feelings as well as the passionate kiss, and perhaps most pressingly the rumored relationship between Jack and I.

"And...?" Quite impatiently, he waited for me to answer.

I went out on a limb. It must have been a side effect from sleep deprivation. "And he said he'd heard some things around. I guess from other people on tour with us." I shifted uncomfortably, already regretting the road I was traveling down.

"About?" Jack folded his arms somewhat protectively around himself.

Averting my eyes to the foot-traffic below, I studied an ant figure businessman juggling a box of croissants on his briefcase while the napkins he held blew out behind him like autumn leaves. "You and me."

After a moment of hesitation, Jack repeated his previous question, "About?"

I shrugged and leaned my back against the city backdrop, "I guess they just thought we were dating or something. Apparently it looks that way to people on the outside. Crazy, right?"

His answering laugh was tight. "Yeah, crazy. People are just..." Coming up empty, he used the same adjective again, "crazy." Jack was beginning to sound like a broken record.

"I mean... Have you ever thought about that before?" I avoided his eyes, suddenly finding the hem of my sweatshirt very interesting.

Jack choked on some of his green tea but it seemed more rehearsed than an actual reflex. "You and me?" He took a breath before joking away the question. "Come on, Sinclair. Don't back me into a corner here."

"Last names now, Barakat?" I questioned lightly, still finding his surname very strange.

The conversation steered away from any potential relationship and part of me was relieved to see it go; Jack and I could always worry about feelings that may or may not exist another day. But still my brain processed the way he angled his body towards mine, his dreamy smiles, and the constant jokes trying to squeeze a laugh out of me and couldn't help thinking it meant something more. I must be mental.

After a few hours had passed, Jack and I still remained on the balcony. Our cups had long since grown cold and condensation clung desperately to the smooth china like climbers scaling a mountainside. The time passed by with discussions of bucket lists and life philosophies. By the middle of the conversation, Jack and I had spit-promised off of the side of the balcony to travel to India together and ride elephants and get matching tattoos. Something artsy, not trite. No backing out, we told each other with smiles equal in width.

Alex lumbered through the door around noon and the shadows under his eyes had lightened minutely. Popping a grape into his mouth, his head turned back and forth like watching a tennis match as Jack and I quarreled over whether to fly first or second class when going on our future eastern adventure. I argued saving money on the plane fare meant more to spend on a good tattoo artist, while Jack wanted to land in style with 'a dry martini in one hand and a fat cigar in the other.'

The two of us turned to Alex for the tie-breaker and he answered with a mouth half full of assorted fruit. "Second."

"See, I'm right." I smiled in victory.

Jack snorted, "For once."

"Hey, not nice."

Alex cut the conversation off and asked, "How long did I sleep for?"

"A few hours." I replied trying to study him without looking like I was doing so. His face seemed a little sallow, the beginnings of a skeleton emerging from beneath his skin. The recent sleep seemed to perk up his mood fractionally and the nutrients in the fresh produce was definitely benefiting his health as well.

Squinting into the dim sunlight, Alex scratched the side of his head with his index finger. "Seemed like more time."

"You're losing track of the hours these days." Jack commented casually though the concern was evident in his strained voice. "Are you feeling alright?"

Rubbing his forearms in the cool weather, Alex puffed out a long sigh. "The tour's just been a lot. Too much stress. And... other things." No one pointed out that 'other things' meant Caitlyn and me.

"Understandable." Jack spoke quickly to keep the conversation light. He didn't want anymore fights between Alex and I, trying very hard to keep us balancing on the neutral ground of acceptance. "Just take it easy, man. The fans are important, but it's not worth killing yourself over. If you need a break, let someone know."

"You do the same." Alex told him sincerely. It was refreshing to see such a caring friendship. The two men relied on each other to keep both in check and on key. Their friendship was flourishing despite the troubles going on around the pair.

"We gotta keep tabs on Rian and Zack too." Jack reminded.

"Don't let them know; they'll think we're babying them."

Sitting on the balcony and laughing at jokes with the two band members made life seem easy and stress free again. It almost seemed as if the drama with Caitlyn never even happened at all. Sometimes it was so easy to forget things you wished would go away.

After sighing, I left the two friends to chat while I went to refill the glasses and grab some other resources to keep the unexpectantly pleasant conversation going. After I had put another kettle on the stove to boil, the familiar ringtone of my cellphone directed my attention to the living room.

I found my whining, buzzing phone between the couch cushions and glanced at the screen to check what I had missed: one unread text message. My heart skipped at the name on the digital screen. Dorian.