I left her when I found her

2011

I looked down at the stone standing in front of me. The cool February California air was nipping at my cheeks as I brushed my hair from my face. My hand ran down my neck to the chain around it that held two rings dangling from it. A small smile graced my face as I knelt down and placed the flowers in my hands with the others that graced the stone, along with the stuffed animals and pieces of paper.

“It’s funny Jim, how much you really changed my life.” I said softly as memories of how everything happened to end up here.

August 2007

Feeling the heat from the California sun beating down on my back as I wiped my most prized possession in front of me off, drying off the suds from the washing it just received. I wiped my bangs from my forehead as I gazed down at my car. My convertible mustang sat in my driveway shining in the gleaming sun.

“Miranda!”

Turning my head I spot my coworker waving at me as she ran up towards me.

“What’s wrong Amber?” I asked wiping my hands on my towel.

“They need you at the diner tonight, Greg said he called but you didn’t pick up.”

“I’ve been out here all afternoon.” I said pointing to my car.

“Yeah that’s what I told him.” she said laughing.

“So the diner.” I said

“Yup, at 6.” she said

“Alright are you gonna be there?”

“Not till 8, my dad’s gonna be pissed that I’m working this late.” she muttered

I gave her a smile. “I’ll see you tonight Amber.” I said shaking my head.

“Alright see ya!” she said waving and running back to her house. I sighed thinking about how today was suppose to be my day off.

That Night

It was around 9 at night and I was leaning against the counter of the bar as I watched Amber and Rachel work on their costumers. More like the people who didn’t want to drive 25 more miles to the next Mcdonalds.

I looked out the window seeing the quiet area around us, as all the other stores and businesses were closed. I watched as a SUV pulled in the parking lot, their lights blinding me making me close my eyes quickly and blink as I watched as they turned their car off and slowly five figures got out of the SUV and make their way towards the door. I looked over at Rachel and Amber seeing them serving food. Knowing these people would be coming to my side seeing as it was empty and had more seating. Greg’s idea really, knowing I could handle the whole area while dividing the other for the other girls.

When the five of them came in I saw it was a group of guys they all looked exhausted. They quickly made their way to my side and sat down. The sound of scraping chairs caught Amber and Rachel’s ears as they both looked up seeing me grabbing menus and waving at them. Making my way towards the group of guys I passed out the menus.

“Hello, My name’s Miranda, welcome to The Wrecks Diner. What can I get you guys to drink?” I asked quietly but loud enough for them to hear me.

“What’s the special?” asked the one with his really short hair.

“Country Fried Steak with Mash potatoes.” I said with a smile.

He flashed me a dimple smile. “I’ll have that and do you have coke?”

“Yeah we do.”

I looked at the other four waiting for them to speak. The one with the longest hair and a hat on asked for a burger and fires as well as a coke.

I quickly took down all their orders before going and getting their drinks sitting the drinks in front of them and straws I told them their order would be done as soon as possible. While I waited for their food I helped Amber and Rachel’s tables and cleaned some off. When the bell rang I grabbed the plates and set them in front of the guys.

I heard the door ding and looked up instantly frowning at the person that stood in the doorway.

“Miranda I need to talk to you now!” he said

I walked closer to him ignoring the confused and curious looks. Grabbing his arm and dragging him out the restaurant.

“What in the seven fucking hells are you doing here!” I hissed behind my clenched teeth.

“I miss you.” he said trying to touch my face I slapped his hand away.

“No you don’t you lying cheating bastard, did she dump your sorry ass?” I asked

He sighed and swayed a bit.

“She left me said she couldn’t handle my ways or some shit. But Randa.”

“Don’t fucking go there Jeremy.” I snapped I poked him in the chest. “You get your drunk drug addicted ass to your house before I call the cops and have them arrest you for harassment, drugs, and being publicly intoxicated.” I turned to go back in only to be grabbed forward into someone’s chest looking back hearing a grunt. Seeing Jeremy on the ground being held down by two of the guys from inside. The one with the dimple smile and the one with the hat. The short one with the mohawk was on the phone quietly murmuring into the phone while the one with the snake bites was watching with a frown. I looked up seeing bright blue eyes staring down at me.

“Are you okay?” he asked. His voice had a lisp but that was probably a cause of his labret piercing or he was born with it.

“Yeah thanks.” I muttered as he slowly let go of me.

“He was about to hit you when you started back inside.” The snake bite guy said. I blinked and nodded before looking towards Jeremy before going near him.

“Hey”

“Your a piece of shit.” I growled staring into Jeremy’s clouded eyes.

“Fuck you Miranda oh wait I already did that.”

A loud slap was heard and a slight sting in my hand was present as I huffed watching his cheek start to get red.

“Rot in hell.”

After the cops came and took Jeremy to a jail cell for the night I thanked the guys.

"It's not a problem don't worry about it." The one with dimples said with a grin.

"I don't know how to thank you but I have too." I said biting my lip.

"You don't have to do anything." The guy with the wild blue eyes said as his arm made its way around my shoulders. A smile broke across my face.

-week later-

I was cleaning one of the tables off when the bells dinged. Looking up and brushing my dark hair from my face I blinked seeing Jimmy from the other week.

“RANDA!!” he practically screamed in the most girly voice a man could make. It made me giggle at his attempt as he bounded over towards me and wrapped him arms around me.

“How are you doing today?” he asked with a grin.

“I’m good Jimmy, but aren’t you suppose to be at home relaxing?”

He just grinned and shrugged before taking a seat at the bar. "I am relaxing but I'm doing it by hanging out with my new buddy!" he grinned up at me as I stood there with wide eyes.

"Okay, well do you want anything?"

"A coke?"

Nodding I go and get him a coke before attending to the few costumers.

A few hours later I found myself watch the costumers leave besides Jimmy of course.

"Hey Randa?"

"Yeah Jim?"

"Would you uh like to go out?" he asked while rubbing his neck. I blinked and turned and looked up at him.

"Sure Jimmy." I laughed as he quickly cheered and wrapped his arms around my waist and hoisted me up.

"Jimmy! Put me down!!"

"NEVER!!!"

-couple of months later-

“MIRANDA THERES A GUY HERE FOR YOU!!!” my roommate called to me as I was checking on my facebook account. Walking out of my room and down the hall I see my roommate watching something that was in the living room.
“What do you mean theres a guy here for me?” I stopped and my eyes widen as I saw Jimmy standing there looking over all my pictures I had set up around the room.

“Jimmy? What on earth are you doing here?” I asked confused I knew the guys were suppose to be touring. His head snapped so fast towards me. He was wearing his glasses and his hear was everywhere. He actually looked like he just woke up not to long ago.

“Randa! You have to come!” he said running over to me and grabbing my hands and started jumping up and down. I blinked confused.

“What do you mean Jimmy come where?”

“Tour! With the guys and I please please please puhlease!!!!” he dropped to his knees and wrapped his long arms around my waist his chin was resting on my stomach his wide blue eyes stared up at me.

“Your begging me?”

“YES.”

I couldn’t help the giggle that escaped my lips. His grin got wider before I nodded quickly and he quickly got up and hoisted me in the air.

“You’ll love it Randa, This is going to be amazing!!” he grinned.

“Jimmy put me down.”

“But I don’t wanna.”

“I need to pack if you want me to go with you.” I said raising my eyebrow. He quickly put me down on the ground before taking my hand and dragging me down the hallway.

“Where’s your room you need to pack like yesterday.” he said

I chuckled while I pushed him towards my room. I tugged my hand out of his and making my way towards my closet and pulling out my huge and I mean huge duffle bag. Looking over my shoulder I see Jimmy looking at my walls. There was a lot of different band posters but I think his eyes went directly towards the one centered on my wall.

“That’s us!” he grinned looking over at me.

“Well duh.”

He stuck his tongue out at me, before he stared to explore my room. I started grabbing shirts, shorts and jeans. Once I got that done I turned around seeing Jimmy grinning holding a pair of my underwear. I could feel my cheeks alight with a blush.

“Well Well look what Randa has.” he chuckled

“Jimmy give those to me.” I said holding my hand out.

He just grinned and raised them over his head. I sighed as I looked up at my underwear hanging by his fingers above both of our heads.

’I hate being short’I thought as I rolled my eyes and turned around going back to my drawer and pulling out my underwear and placing it in my bag only to see the pair of underwear flying and landing in the bag. I turned and looked back at Jimmy and raised my eyebrow at his casual position on my bed.
“Comfy?” I asked

“Oh yes very.” he chuckled stretching out on my small bed. I rolled my eyes again and quickly finished packing.

-after touring sometime in 2008-

“Jimmy why am I here?” I asked raising one of my eyebrows as I stood in the entry way of his home. He dumped his bags at the steps and looked over at me with a grin. He quickly strode over to me and wrapped his long arms around me, burying his head in my neck. It looked odd for his tall frame to be bent down to my height but this was Jimmy.

“I don’t want you to go home Randa.” he mumbled into my neck, I shivered as his lips ghosted over my neck as he spoke.

“Why.”

“Cause’ I like having you near me, tour was amazing with you in it, and I don’t wanna let you go.” he whispered as he looked me in the eyes his arms still were wrapped around my waist.

“My job?”

“Forget it. Miranda I’ll take care of you I promise.” he said. I bit my lip looking around me.

“Jimmy.”

“Miranda.”

I looked at him watching as he gave me his wide grin.

“Please Please Please!” he begged falling to his knees his chin was digging into my stomach. I let out a sigh before a grin started to grow on my face. I swear his eyes grew wider in excitement as he quickly got up and wrapped his arms around my waist as I let out a laugh as he spun me around.

- a year later 2009-

Staying with Jimmy was anything but boring.

“Miranda.”

I rolled over hugging my pillow closer to me as I was trying to sleep.

“Randa.”

A soft prodding in my side made me flinch.

“Randaaaa.”

“What.” I muttered with my eyes clenched shut.

“Wake up.”

“No.”

“Please.”

“No.”

“Pretty Please.” warmth flew over my ear as the calloused fingers tapped on my bare arms as my shirt was a tank top.

“No Jimmy.”

“Pretty Pretty Please. I wanna show you something.” he whispered. I rolled over and cracked my eyes open and looked up into his wild blue eyes.

“What Jim.”

He grinned at me while brushing some of my hair out of my face.

“Get up.” I watched him climb out of the bed and walk out of the room. I sat up and sighed pulling the covers off of my legs and followed after him. Once I hit the first floor I wondered what he had up his sleeve.

“Jimmy?”

“Out here!” he called from the open backdoor. I walked out in my shorts and tank bare footed looking over at him as he stood at the steps leading to the beach. “Come on.” he beckoned me to follow as he took my hand and gently pulled me with him down the steps.

“Jimmy what time is it?” I asked

“It’s 8 Randa.” he said

“8.”

“Yup.”

“Why are you awake at 8?” I asked confused.

“You’ll see.”

I kept quite as he pulled me behind him until he stopped. I looked out on the beach seeing it almost empty of life. It was actually cool and quite with the waves, peaceful that was the word.

“Miranda.”

I turned to him and looked up. “Yeah.”

He took my hands and held them messing around with my fingers. His head leaned down and rested against mine. I looked into his eyes hoping my confusion showed through.

“Be mine.”

“Jimmy what do you mean, I’m already yours.”

“No no be mine, body and soul.” he whispered one of his hands coming and resting on my cheek. “Your what I want to wake up to every morning, and what I want to wrap my arms around at night when I go to sleep.” he said.

I slowly smiled as I raised one of my hands and ran it across his face.

“Okay.” I whispered before his lips met mine. My arms wrapped themselves around his neck as his wrapped at my waist and picked me up.

“I love you.” a kiss on the forehead. “I love you.” a kiss on the nose.
“I love you.” his lips met mine again as he quickly brought me back inside the house with me laughing the entire time.

-months later-

I let out sigh as I leaned against the counter in the kitchen. Jimmy was up stairs packing for a trip to Big Bear. The guys were starting to work on a new album. Which meant that I wouldn’t be able to see him or any of the guys as often.

“Babe! Where’s my toothbrush!”

I chuckled as I walked up the stairs.

“Have you checked the bathroom?” I questioned as I watched him dash around the room looking for his toothbrush. He paused before looking over at me giving me a sheepish grin.

“Opps.”

I giggled as he grabbed his toothbrush and placed it in his bag before walking towards me and wrapping his arm around my shoulders bring me closer, I wrapped mine around his waist.

“I’m gonna miss you.” he said placing a kiss on my forehead.

“You’ll only be gone a week, then you’ll be coming home.” I said with a smile as his lips met mine quickly.

“I know I just wished you’d be able to come but Matt doesn’t want any of the girls there.” He pouted.

“Hey it gives me time to get your christmas present.” I said tapping his bottom lip as he nipped at it.

“Your all I need baby.” he said with a cheese grin while wiggling his eyebrows. I laughed while shaking my head. The sounds of a car pulling up into the driveway and doors shutting made me frown and Jimmy quickly kissed me.

“Don’t be sad Randa.” he said.

“I can’t help it, but I will admit I’m excited.” I said

“JIMMY”

“YO REV.”

“Time for you to go.” I said softly watching him grab his bag and taking my hand pulling me with him down the stairs.

I gave all the guys hugs and good lucks and watched them walk out the door, Jimmy giving my one last smile before he climbed into the SUV.

- Christmas-

I woke up early and stood inside the bathroom with my hand covering my mouth as I looked at the stick in the sink. I bit my lip and looked out the door into the bedroom where Jimmy laid out asleep, he hadn’t been feeling well the last few days. I walked in the bedroom and crawled into the bed. I sat on my knees next to Jimmy looking down at him. I rested my hand on his shoulder.

“Jimmy.” I whispered. He cracked his eyes open and looked up at me rolling over and smiling.

“Hey.” he said

“Hey.” I whispered brushing his black bangs from his forehead and leaning down and pressing a kiss there. I guess he could sense my agitation as he wrapped his arms around my waist, his fingers danced against my back gently.

“Randa what’s wrong.”

I bit my lip and looked down at my lip, my nerves were hay-wired.

“Randa, babe what’s wrong.” he asked again as he sat up and looked me in the eyes while holding my chin.

“I’m pregnant.” I whispered.

I watched his eyes widen slightly before he pulled back slightly and looked down at my stomach before looking at me.

“whoa.” he whispered before his grin came up on his face before leaning over and placing a kiss on my lips and jumping out of the bed and rushing out of the room. “I’M GONNA BE A DADDY!!!!!!!.” He screamed as he rushed around the house. I sat there in shocked but, a feeling rushed over me, a feeling of dread and sadness.

Christmas came and went as soon as everyone left promising to call and set plans for the new years party. I sat on the couch exhausted from the day. Looking over at Jimmy as he snoozed on the lounge chair. I smiled before getting up and walking towards him and sat on the arm poking his arm.

“Jimmy.”

“Hmm?” he hummed as he opened his eyes and looked at me his arms automatically coming around me and pulling me to his lap and leaning his head on my shoulder his hand resting on my stomach.

“Let’s go to bed.” I said.

We made our way to the bedroom and climbed into bed with our clothes still on to lazy to remove them and place our night clothes on. He pulled me closer and we fell asleep.

-few days later Dec. 28, 2009-

I was in the kitchen trying to find something to nibble on that would help my uneasy stomach as Jimmy came in stretching.

"Hey babe." he said kissing my cheek while taking out a beer from the fridge. I frowned at him knowing he had just taking his medicine. "Don't worry I'll be fine." he chuckled at my pout. I grabbed the gram crackers and stalked into the living room before falling on the couch and flipping through the channels.

"Randa." he whined following me.

"No."

"Don't be like that babe."

"Why not!"

"Miranda calm down."

I pouted and bit into a cracker while he sat down next to me wrapping his arm around me and pulling me into his side.

"I hate this."

"I'm sorry."

"Stupid cravings, stupid morning sickness, stupid mood swings." I whined

"Sorry Randa." he muttered placing a kiss on my forehead.

"Don't be it takes two anyways." I said lightly smiling looking up at him seeing him grin down at me before his lips covered mine.

"I love you Miranda."

"I love you too Jimmy." I whispered closing my eyes and laying my head down on his chest.

"And I love you too mini-me." he said poking my stomach gently, making me giggle.

I closed my eyes as the shows blurred together. All that was running through my head was how I wished it would be like this forever.

That night when we headed to bed, after Jimmy had another beer. I laid awake on my side staring out the window, my stomach wasn't settling well and I couldn't help but leaping from the bed and dashing to the bathroom to throw up my dinner. It surprised me that I didn't feel my hair being lifted like it had been getting lately. Once I was done I washed my mouth out and made my way back to the bed, crawling in I noticed that even me getting in bed didn't wake him up. That's when I noticed it, his chest wasn't rising or failing.

My throat tightened as my eyes widen. "Jimmy."

nothing

"Jimmy!" I yelled. I got on my knees and placed my hands on his cheeks, noticing the coolness beneath my hands. I could feel the tears building behind my eyes. "Jimmy." I whispered shaking his shoulder. A sob broke through and I quickly ran and grabbed the phone dialing 911 quickly.

"Please you have to help, he's not breath, oh god no Jimmy please please god help me."

- February 2011-

I whipped away the tears as my hand went to the necklace that was around my neck.

"I miss you Jimmy." I whispered while my hand went into my pocket pulling out a picture a small smile graced my face as I looked down at bright blue eyes and a head of curly dark hair and a wild grin. I placed it on the headstone placing a small stone on the corner so it wouldn't blow away.

"He misses you too." I whispered as I kissed my fingers and gently placed them on the stone. Before looking over at the small road that had a black SUV parked and a two women stood there looking like twins, which they were and Matt stood there holding a little boy who was napping on his shoulder. A smile graced my face as I walked towards them glancing back at the stone. Reading the stone and memorizing the words like I did every time I came here.

"I can take him Matt." I said reaching for the little boy. Matt gave me a sad grin before handing me the year and a half old that was taller then normal children his age and already walking. His long lashes brushed his cheeks as he rested his head on my shoulder. I placed him in his car seat and buckled him in. Quickly getting in with him as the others got in too. I felt a cold chill against my cheek as I looked back at the stone.

'See you soon Jimmy, Love you.'