A Love So Wrong

Franks pov  
It has been 237 days since I had fallen in love with Gerard way. And it couldn't be more wrong. He was married, with a daughter at that. I was married too, with two daughters. Twins actually. But I still had that gaping hole in the middle of my chest. I was missing something. That something just happened to be my bestfriend. The worst part of it all was that I was in a very bad situation . I was in fact, a closet gay. No not bisexual but full on gay.  This was killing me inside. I was using this woman I called my wife, as a cover up. I had never felt more guilty. 
    We were on tour, once again. I hated tours and that was for only one reason. I had to live with the man I love and keep it a secret from him. From everyone. But I dont really mind the way we joke around. But truth was, I was never joking.
    Gerard walked into the room then, right on cue. His amazing hazel eyes looked they're way around the room before landing on me. I smiled politely  at him and waved. God he was gorgeous. 
   "Hey Frankie what you doing?" He asked me as he made his way over to the couch plopping down next to me. He crossed his leg over like he always did. 
    "Nothing. Just thinking." I told him truthfully. I sighed and looked down at my tattoo covered hands. Being so close to him was painful. I knew he wasn't mine and he would never be mine. He was off limits. 
   "And about what may I ask?" he asked me cheekily. He put his hand down on my now shaking hands. "Frank... Are you okay? Your acting a bit...strange.  Your worrying me." he whispered as he removed his hands. Oh if only he knew the effect he had on me. 
    If he ever found out about the feelings that I had for him, our friendship would be over. Along with the band. I couldn't be the one that destroyed it all.  I couldn't destroy everything that mattered to me most. 
        "No I'm not okay but i learn to cope. It's a daily thing." truth was it was a daily thing. I would sit here a lot and think about Gerard. Way to much. I dreamt about him every night. If only those dreams would become reality. 
   " Well I'm not used to seeing you like this Frankie. Please just try go get better?" he asked me as he wrapped me up in a hug. Why did he have to be so caring?
      The tears started to fall now, I knew what I was about to do. I would regret it soon after. I had to let him know my true feelings even if I knew that it wouldn't end well. Soon enough I started to stain his shirt with my tears. Very polite Frank. 
    " I- I love you Gee." I whispered to him as I nuzzled my head into his neck. "I love you so much it hurts." I whispered loud enough for him to hear.
    I felt Gerard's body stiffen as he grabbed onto me tighter. I could feel my shirt beginning to moisten. I knew it wasn't my own tears. Gerard was crying. This confused me. He had no reason to cry. He did nothing wrong. I couldn't help but feel guilty. 
    "You have no idea how long I have waited for you to say that to me." he whispered into my hair. I completely froze. What did he just say? 
    "W-what?" I mumbled looking up at him through my teary  eyes. He blushed a bright shade of red before cupping my face in his hands. 
   "I have been in love with you for years Frank." he said in all seriousness. "I love you." he whispered as he closed the gap between us. He kissed me. Not like those stage kisses. But this was a real kiss. The one I have been waiting for. 
    " Gerard I have been in love with you for 237 days." I whispered to him. Looking at him in his lively hazel eyes. 
     I couldn't help but smile. I was now happy. For now anyway. Me and Gerard couldnt be together though. He had his wife and I had mine. We were only ever going to be one thing. Friends. That's how it had to be. Even though it pained me not to be with him. 
    " I love you." he whispered to me again as his lips met mine. I could be happy for now. I would allow myself that much time. Only until tour was over. Then things would go back to normal. Even if that's not what I had wanted