‹ Prequel: When You Were Young
I Can't Remember That Was Us
There's That Awful Feeling Again
“I’m starting to get worried.” I said, pacing around my living room. I had the phone in my hand just in case I got any phone calls.
“I thought you were already worried.” Rainah said, standing from the couch and crossing her arms in front of her chest. I rolled my eyes at her.
“I was…I’m just…more worried now.” I said, turning the phone on and dialing Matt’s cell phone number. It rang a bunch of times and then his voice mail picked up.
Hey, this is Matt (you can hear me laughing in the background.) and if you are some slutty bimbo who is trying to break Hayleigh and I up, then I suggest you hang the fuck up! I LOVE HER! (you can hear me scream ‘I LOVE YOU TOO!’ in a raspy voice.) But if you’re someone else, then feel free to leave a message and I’ll call you back if I feel like it. (“HE WON’T CALL YOU!” I yelled in the background. Matt chuckled before the message ended.) I heard the operator say ‘Please leave your message after the tone.’ And then I heard a beep.
“Matt! Please call me as soon as you can, I’m worried sick about you! I love you.” I said before hanging up the phone.
I guess I should probably tell you the story of the message…unless you don’t want to know, then you can skip this…But anyhow, I used Matt’s phone to make a phone call because my phone was dead. Mind you, I had his permission. His phone had a voice mail from a number that I didn’t recognize so I went ahead and listened to it.
Oh, Matt! Zacky gave me your number, I hope you don’t mind that I gave you a call. Look, I know you’re married, but I want to know if you could get coffee with me sometime. Okay, just give me a call back. Buh-Bye. Was what the message said. It was a woman who sounded beyond slutty. I confronted Matt about the voice mail and I was highly upset. We argued about it for about 20 minutes before Matt explained to me that Zacky probably gave her the number because he wanted to get back at him for a bad prank. I wasn’t angry after that, under the condition that it didn’t happen again. We were joking around after the argument when he decided to make the voice mail message. I wasn’t really the jealous type, but sometimes I get a little nervous about things like that. It’s not that I don’t trust Matt, I just don’t trust the women.
“No answer, I take it.” Rainah stated as she looked me in the eyes. I couldn’t even look at her because I had a feeling and I could feel some tears forming in my eyes.
“I should have just went with him.” I said, shaking my head.
“Sweetie, you get sea sick. You would’ve barfed on someone.”
“I know, but I wouldn’t be so worried right now. I’d rather be sea sick than worried…” I told her, thinking that it would probably be the other way around if I actually were on the boat and sea sick.
“You are going to feel stupid when Matt walks in that door with a shit eating grin on his face.” She said, shaking her head at me.
“So, you’re saying I’m stupid, huh?” I asked, feeling offended.
“No, I’m just saying that it’s a little unrealistic to worry about Matt now, I mean he’s only been gone 4 hours.” She told me. I might find that this was actually the truth, had I not been filled with hormones. Also, the fact that Matt’s coma had a great affect on my life. I had a sort of anxiety, and she just didn’t get that.
“That’s the same thing. You’re calling me childish and stupid. If you’re going to be like that, then I suggest you just leave and let me worry about Matt by myself.” I argued.
“No, you don’t need to be alone, Hayleigh. You’re pregnant.”
“No, Rainah, I INSIST.” I said, glaring at her and willing her to leave. She sighed and shook her head before storming out my door. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I decided to forget our little spat for now and just focus on waiting for Matt to come home. I turned my music on as loud as I could and paced around the living room, phone in hand, waiting for the love of my life to walk back into our home. Finally, my feet hurt from walking and standing so much, so I had to sit down on the sofa in front of the window. I looked out the window for a few minutes and then I realized something that I should have realized earlier. They are supposed to be gone for 2 days. They’ll be back the day after tomorrow, they’re fine, they’re just out there fishing or something. It had already stopped raining and the sun was starting to come back out. But that still didn’t stop me from having that bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I could just sense that something was wrong.
I actually fell asleep on the sofa, only to be woken up by the sound of a car in the driveway. I felt myself get so excited and feel so relieved because I just knew that it was Matt coming home early because of the rain or something. I looked out the window to see Brian’s car. Brian, Stephanie, and Jimmy got out of the car…but no Matt. My heart sank to my feet and tears began to fill my eyes. I ran outside and met all three of them before they even made it close to the house. There's that awful feeling again.
“Where’s Matt?! Where’s my husband?!” I said nervously, looking from Brian to Stephanie to Jimmy. They were all soaking wet and they each had a sad look on their face.
“Stop looking at me like I’m fucking crazy! Just tell me where the hell my Mattie is!” I ordered them. Finally, Jimmy stepped up to me and gently grabbed my shoulders.
“Maybe we should go inside so you can sit down…You’re shak-“ I cut him off.
“Don’t fucking touch me! WHERE THE FUCK IS MATT! JUST FUCKING TELL ME!” I was so angry that I could barely contain myself. He then sighed, I knew that he was giving in and was going to tell me.
“Hayleigh…there was a bad storm and…Matt fell off the boat…we…they’re looking for him…” I could barely understand the words. I had to think about them for a moment before I realized what was happening. I no longer had the strength in my legs to stand and fell to my knees with my hands covering my face. I knew that never ending tears were streaming down my face. Jimmy was trying to help me back up to my feet, but I wasn't moving. He was saying something, but I couldn't concentrate on his words long enough to hear him.
Matt already left me once. How can this be happening again? He can’t leave me, I’ll die without him.
“I thought you were already worried.” Rainah said, standing from the couch and crossing her arms in front of her chest. I rolled my eyes at her.
“I was…I’m just…more worried now.” I said, turning the phone on and dialing Matt’s cell phone number. It rang a bunch of times and then his voice mail picked up.
Hey, this is Matt (you can hear me laughing in the background.) and if you are some slutty bimbo who is trying to break Hayleigh and I up, then I suggest you hang the fuck up! I LOVE HER! (you can hear me scream ‘I LOVE YOU TOO!’ in a raspy voice.) But if you’re someone else, then feel free to leave a message and I’ll call you back if I feel like it. (“HE WON’T CALL YOU!” I yelled in the background. Matt chuckled before the message ended.) I heard the operator say ‘Please leave your message after the tone.’ And then I heard a beep.
“Matt! Please call me as soon as you can, I’m worried sick about you! I love you.” I said before hanging up the phone.
I guess I should probably tell you the story of the message…unless you don’t want to know, then you can skip this…But anyhow, I used Matt’s phone to make a phone call because my phone was dead. Mind you, I had his permission. His phone had a voice mail from a number that I didn’t recognize so I went ahead and listened to it.
Oh, Matt! Zacky gave me your number, I hope you don’t mind that I gave you a call. Look, I know you’re married, but I want to know if you could get coffee with me sometime. Okay, just give me a call back. Buh-Bye. Was what the message said. It was a woman who sounded beyond slutty. I confronted Matt about the voice mail and I was highly upset. We argued about it for about 20 minutes before Matt explained to me that Zacky probably gave her the number because he wanted to get back at him for a bad prank. I wasn’t angry after that, under the condition that it didn’t happen again. We were joking around after the argument when he decided to make the voice mail message. I wasn’t really the jealous type, but sometimes I get a little nervous about things like that. It’s not that I don’t trust Matt, I just don’t trust the women.
“No answer, I take it.” Rainah stated as she looked me in the eyes. I couldn’t even look at her because I had a feeling and I could feel some tears forming in my eyes.
“I should have just went with him.” I said, shaking my head.
“Sweetie, you get sea sick. You would’ve barfed on someone.”
“I know, but I wouldn’t be so worried right now. I’d rather be sea sick than worried…” I told her, thinking that it would probably be the other way around if I actually were on the boat and sea sick.
“You are going to feel stupid when Matt walks in that door with a shit eating grin on his face.” She said, shaking her head at me.
“So, you’re saying I’m stupid, huh?” I asked, feeling offended.
“No, I’m just saying that it’s a little unrealistic to worry about Matt now, I mean he’s only been gone 4 hours.” She told me. I might find that this was actually the truth, had I not been filled with hormones. Also, the fact that Matt’s coma had a great affect on my life. I had a sort of anxiety, and she just didn’t get that.
“That’s the same thing. You’re calling me childish and stupid. If you’re going to be like that, then I suggest you just leave and let me worry about Matt by myself.” I argued.
“No, you don’t need to be alone, Hayleigh. You’re pregnant.”
“No, Rainah, I INSIST.” I said, glaring at her and willing her to leave. She sighed and shook her head before storming out my door. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I decided to forget our little spat for now and just focus on waiting for Matt to come home. I turned my music on as loud as I could and paced around the living room, phone in hand, waiting for the love of my life to walk back into our home. Finally, my feet hurt from walking and standing so much, so I had to sit down on the sofa in front of the window. I looked out the window for a few minutes and then I realized something that I should have realized earlier. They are supposed to be gone for 2 days. They’ll be back the day after tomorrow, they’re fine, they’re just out there fishing or something. It had already stopped raining and the sun was starting to come back out. But that still didn’t stop me from having that bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. I could just sense that something was wrong.
I actually fell asleep on the sofa, only to be woken up by the sound of a car in the driveway. I felt myself get so excited and feel so relieved because I just knew that it was Matt coming home early because of the rain or something. I looked out the window to see Brian’s car. Brian, Stephanie, and Jimmy got out of the car…but no Matt. My heart sank to my feet and tears began to fill my eyes. I ran outside and met all three of them before they even made it close to the house. There's that awful feeling again.
“Where’s Matt?! Where’s my husband?!” I said nervously, looking from Brian to Stephanie to Jimmy. They were all soaking wet and they each had a sad look on their face.
“Stop looking at me like I’m fucking crazy! Just tell me where the hell my Mattie is!” I ordered them. Finally, Jimmy stepped up to me and gently grabbed my shoulders.
“Maybe we should go inside so you can sit down…You’re shak-“ I cut him off.
“Don’t fucking touch me! WHERE THE FUCK IS MATT! JUST FUCKING TELL ME!” I was so angry that I could barely contain myself. He then sighed, I knew that he was giving in and was going to tell me.
“Hayleigh…there was a bad storm and…Matt fell off the boat…we…they’re looking for him…” I could barely understand the words. I had to think about them for a moment before I realized what was happening. I no longer had the strength in my legs to stand and fell to my knees with my hands covering my face. I knew that never ending tears were streaming down my face. Jimmy was trying to help me back up to my feet, but I wasn't moving. He was saying something, but I couldn't concentrate on his words long enough to hear him.
Matt already left me once. How can this be happening again? He can’t leave me, I’ll die without him.
♠ ♠ ♠
Some filler, some not.