You Know I Still Get Lost in Your Eyes

(-2 months later-)

“Kenneth what about this one?” I asked showing him more pictures of houses; He smiled and took another sip of his beer. I raised the picture up so he could see it more clearly, and he poked it with his free hand. I rolled my eyes playfully “you keep fucking around Mr. Nixon, we’re never gonna get outta this apartment” Kenneth kissed my check and snatched the list of houses from me, I protested. “Hey!” But he just smiled “What are we gonna name our daughter Toni” I shrugged and laid my head on his broad shoulder, “Why can’t we wait until we actually have her, Kenneth” He sighed and sat his beer down on the bed-side table and then faced me with the same excited smile “I just can’t wait!” His hand finding my stomach and softly rubbing my stomach which was starting to show a small baby bump. I played with his wedding ring on his other hand and sighed “I want her to have a boy name...” “Like yours” I pouted “No! Toni with an ‘I’ is not a boy name! See if it was spelled with a ‘y’ then it’s a boy’s name” He rolled his eyes and finished the rest of his beer. “I’m starting a band” I gave him a confused look “A band?" He nodded “Yeah one with a couple of old class-mates from high school”

I nodded and smirked “if you starting a band, then I wanna get a job” He sighed and looked deep into my eyes “Toni… you know I don’t like you working” I leaned over and kissed his cheek softly “But in order to buy all the baby stuff, we have to have money Hun” He sighed and said “I guess so” I smiled and slightly cheered, “Kenneth..” He glanced at me innocently and my smile widened as I leaned in and kissed him hard pulling him on top of me.

My eyes shot up and I bolted upright out of bed screaming, waking Kenneth up beside me. “Toni…what... what is it?” He asked me rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. The screaming faded slowly as I took deep breaths. Kenneth grabbed my shoulder lovingly “What happened? Bad dream?” I glanced at him with wide frightened eyes and I nodded terrified. He sighed and brought me into a comforting hug, stroking my hair lightly as I soaked his shirt with my tears. “It’s okay...” He repeated softly to me over and over again.

**Kenneth’s p.o.v**

Toni scared the fuck out of me last night; I knew something was wrong when she couldn’t keep still. Then she woke up screaming causing me to panic and jolt up. I’ve never seen her look so scared in my life. I had to wake up early this morning to go meet up with the guys so we could get started earlier, but I was afraid to leave Toni by herself. Her eyes fluttered opened when she felt me slump out of bed. “Where…where are you going?” She asked still half asleep sitting up and scratching her head lightly.

She looked so beautiful in the morning; I smiled at her and told her in a quiet whisper “I’m going with the guys to our first band meeting” Her eyes closed briefly as her head nodded forward. I chuckled lightly and said slowly “Toni?” She tried to open her eyes but they fluttered back down, “Huh?” she called out sleepily. I smiled and finished tying up my shoes and walk towards her. I grabbed her shoulders and laid her back down on her pillow. She yawned and cuddled up with her pillow. “Night babe” I leaned over and kissed her cheek “Night...”

(-Another 2 months-)

**Normal p.o.v**

Weeks went by and soon the bills began piling up uncontrollably, Kenneth came home later and later due to his band and work and the stressed drained on him much that he would drink more and more than unusual. I was starting to get too big where walking was even becoming a problem. I couldn’t work and sometimes I would get so sleep that I won’t even be able to keep my eyes open for too long. Kenneth and I fought more frequently and sometimes it would get so bad that I would burst out crying right in the middle of it stopping it instantly, I sighed frustrated as I tried to get up from the dinner room table to put Kenneth’s plate in the fridge. He was late… again. I was so tired of it; I didn’t want to put up with it anymore. So when Kenneth walked through the door drunk as always I ignored him and continued reading my book.

He slammed the door behind him and staggered into the apartment, “Sorry I’m late” He slurred using the wall for support. I just shrugged my shoulder “I don’t care Kenneth” I mumbled annoyed, he leaned forward clearly pissed now and said in a low tone "What was that?". I glanced up from my book “I said. I. Don’t. Care” I repeated. He rolled his eyes and said as he walked towards the kitchen. Opening the fridge he dug out a beer, and I glared at him through my short bangs. Once he turned around we met eyes “What?” He said glaring back at me; I just shook my head and glanced back down at my book. “God damnit Toni! Get the fuck off my back sometimes!!” I just shrugged my shoulder slightly “I didn’t say anything Kenneth” He slammed his hands down onto the table “It’s not what you say it’s your expression, the way you look at me. Like I’m nothing!” I dogged – eared my book and said in a smooth voice “I don’t understand how you could think that. When have I ever said to you that you’re nothing Kenneth? Or even looked at you like that?”

He glared at me through his growing hair, his eyes red and beady “where the fuck is my food?” I sighed and pointed towards the microwave. Within a minute I was on my feet and was walking towards the kitchen to grab some water before bed when he turned around and clenched his fist. “Toni why the fuck is it so cold!” I put my hands on my hips and cocked my head to the side “Well lemme guess, its 1:40 in the morning annnnddd I made dinner around 10:02 the time you said you were coming home... So...” I pretended to count on my fingers “you’ve been gone for 3 hours so I’m not surprised that it’s super cold” reaching over I grabbed a cup and turned the faucet on, letting cold water fill the cup. He rubbed his temples “I was busy with work and the band” I chuckled shaking my head and dropping the cup filled with water back into the sink. “Oh god Kenneth, you’re always busy. If you gonna be out for that long then why do you even bother coming home?” He stopped and looked at me angrily and almost immediately I regretted what I said. “Are you saying that I can’t come home?” I didn’t answer and he slammed his hands down onto the table again making me jump up panicked.

“No I didn’t-“ “no I didn’t, oh shut up!” He mocked me harshly then a sharp pain came across my face causing me to stumble backwards and slam myself against the wall. I slid down holding onto my wounded cheek and staring up at him with frightened eyes.