Status: Starting up
Dirty Little Secret
Christina
Three months of pain.
Three months of being scared.
Three months of being alone.
It had gotten to the point where Christina couldn’t go into public without being scared of some raping her, or even killing her. In her eyes that would be the best thing someone could ever to for her. Giving her peace in death, the only way she would ever have peace again. Whenever someone touched her she would flinch and back away. It didn't matter the gender of the person, they could be male or female it still scared her beyond her wits. Not only was she afraid of someone hurting her, she was afraid they would find out about her other secret that would send her to the nut house.
After Christmas, New Years and her 16Th birthday, she went back to school to start the new semester. God knows she didn't want to be around people, let alone her ex-boyfriend and his horny little friends. But school meant everything to her even though she had to deal with people for 8 hours of the day, it was worth it. She loved learning, not something normal teenagers would say. She was given the opportunity to go to college instead of junior year in the fall so she had to keep up with her grades if she liked it or not.
Christina POV
"Hey Chris!? Wanna meet me behind school at lunch?" One of the horny ass guys that went to my school whistled at me.
Just keep your head down and walk I told myself, shaking as I walked to my homeroom. I stumbled because I was shaking so much and seconds before I walked into the classroom the bell rang. As I walked in the room, Mr.Stidham looked at me.
"Well well well, little miss perfect is late. What ever shall we do?" Crazy, scary and totally controlling would be acceptable adjectives for Mr.S.
I stood in the door way, picking at my long sleeved shirt looking like a deer caught in headlights.
"Don't just stand there Christina, it your ass down." Oh yeah and he had a colorful vocabulary too. I whimpered as I walked to my seat in the front row and sat down, putting my things on the desk and stared at them. Just because I said I liked school didn't mean I liked the teachers or the kids. They are so immature and don't realize how good they have it. They have parents to go home to, I don’t. They weren’t raped, I was. They are all smartasses that deserve to be hurt but they have perfect lives.
"Christina?! Did you hear the question?" I looked up at him with a 'duh' face; of course I didn't hear him because I wasn't listening. He sighed, annoyed. Like I cared.
"Why is our economy in the toilet?" Oh great that question. He never cares about your opinion because he thinks his is right and everyone else is wrong.
"Because our democratic president put it there." I said confidently, school being the only place I felt confident. I heard some smirks and snarls behind me, they don't like my opinion but Mr. Stidham was clapping slowly like a dumb child.
"Maybe I was wrong about you yet Miss Christina Hale, good job." He said and gave me the smile that always scared me, even before it happened. Now it makes me shake and my throat to get a lump in it."Mr. S? M-may I g-go to the ba-athro-oom?" He had his head turned to the board, not looking at me.
"Go." He said bluntly and I was out of there. I walked swiftly to the bathroom before I freaked out. I leaned against the counter and screamed. I stood back up and pulled at my hair.
"God! Fuck this shit!" Screaming I kicked the trash can.
Calm the fuck down or you’re going to cause a scene. Too late idiot your already crying
I slid down the wall to the bathroom floor and closed my eyes. Minutes which felt like hours later my breathing was calmer and I wasn't crying any longer.
"Bad morning?" A voice asked, the girl came out of the stall and leaned on the door. I jumped at the sudden company and whispered a sorry. But once I saw that she was stoned out of her wits I calmed down. Even if I told her anything she wouldn't even remember my name. Best thing about drunks, pot heads, and druggies is that you can tell them your life story and they won’t even remember the first sentence.
"Bad three months." I replied splashing water in my face to make myself a little more presentable.
"You look like shit," Oh thanks, why you don’t look in the mirror.
"Whats your name?" she asked as she walked over to the counter, the smell of marijuana coming with her.
"Christina Hale."
"That's right; you’re that smart ass sophomore I got cha." Everyone knew me unfortunately, even the bathroom junkie. I closed my eyes, not wanting to be around anyone anymore but she kept on talking.
"Looks like you could use a pick me up." she said as she put something on the counter, walked up to me with her stoned eyes and the last thing she said was, "For you, the first is free, but the rest will cost ya." And she was gone.
I didn't want to know what she left on the counter, Of course you do Chris, you want to forget and whatever she gave you will do just that.
The bell rang before I could decide. I grabbed the baggy without looking at it and ran into the closest stall. Once I was behind the locked door I finally figured out what she left me.
Blue and white pills of all sizes (probably sleeping aids or anxiety reducers)
White powder, probably cocaine (of course it came with a razor blade to make the lines)
And lastly a couple joints, marijuana.
It was like a goody bad from a bad college party.
Am I really going to do this?
Whatever helps.
Three months of being scared.
Three months of being alone.
It had gotten to the point where Christina couldn’t go into public without being scared of some raping her, or even killing her. In her eyes that would be the best thing someone could ever to for her. Giving her peace in death, the only way she would ever have peace again. Whenever someone touched her she would flinch and back away. It didn't matter the gender of the person, they could be male or female it still scared her beyond her wits. Not only was she afraid of someone hurting her, she was afraid they would find out about her other secret that would send her to the nut house.
After Christmas, New Years and her 16Th birthday, she went back to school to start the new semester. God knows she didn't want to be around people, let alone her ex-boyfriend and his horny little friends. But school meant everything to her even though she had to deal with people for 8 hours of the day, it was worth it. She loved learning, not something normal teenagers would say. She was given the opportunity to go to college instead of junior year in the fall so she had to keep up with her grades if she liked it or not.
Christina POV
"Hey Chris!? Wanna meet me behind school at lunch?" One of the horny ass guys that went to my school whistled at me.
Just keep your head down and walk I told myself, shaking as I walked to my homeroom. I stumbled because I was shaking so much and seconds before I walked into the classroom the bell rang. As I walked in the room, Mr.Stidham looked at me.
"Well well well, little miss perfect is late. What ever shall we do?" Crazy, scary and totally controlling would be acceptable adjectives for Mr.S.
I stood in the door way, picking at my long sleeved shirt looking like a deer caught in headlights.
"Don't just stand there Christina, it your ass down." Oh yeah and he had a colorful vocabulary too. I whimpered as I walked to my seat in the front row and sat down, putting my things on the desk and stared at them. Just because I said I liked school didn't mean I liked the teachers or the kids. They are so immature and don't realize how good they have it. They have parents to go home to, I don’t. They weren’t raped, I was. They are all smartasses that deserve to be hurt but they have perfect lives.
"Christina?! Did you hear the question?" I looked up at him with a 'duh' face; of course I didn't hear him because I wasn't listening. He sighed, annoyed. Like I cared.
"Why is our economy in the toilet?" Oh great that question. He never cares about your opinion because he thinks his is right and everyone else is wrong.
"Because our democratic president put it there." I said confidently, school being the only place I felt confident. I heard some smirks and snarls behind me, they don't like my opinion but Mr. Stidham was clapping slowly like a dumb child.
"Maybe I was wrong about you yet Miss Christina Hale, good job." He said and gave me the smile that always scared me, even before it happened. Now it makes me shake and my throat to get a lump in it."Mr. S? M-may I g-go to the ba-athro-oom?" He had his head turned to the board, not looking at me.
"Go." He said bluntly and I was out of there. I walked swiftly to the bathroom before I freaked out. I leaned against the counter and screamed. I stood back up and pulled at my hair.
"God! Fuck this shit!" Screaming I kicked the trash can.
Calm the fuck down or you’re going to cause a scene. Too late idiot your already crying
I slid down the wall to the bathroom floor and closed my eyes. Minutes which felt like hours later my breathing was calmer and I wasn't crying any longer.
"Bad morning?" A voice asked, the girl came out of the stall and leaned on the door. I jumped at the sudden company and whispered a sorry. But once I saw that she was stoned out of her wits I calmed down. Even if I told her anything she wouldn't even remember my name. Best thing about drunks, pot heads, and druggies is that you can tell them your life story and they won’t even remember the first sentence.
"Bad three months." I replied splashing water in my face to make myself a little more presentable.
"You look like shit," Oh thanks, why you don’t look in the mirror.
"Whats your name?" she asked as she walked over to the counter, the smell of marijuana coming with her.
"Christina Hale."
"That's right; you’re that smart ass sophomore I got cha." Everyone knew me unfortunately, even the bathroom junkie. I closed my eyes, not wanting to be around anyone anymore but she kept on talking.
"Looks like you could use a pick me up." she said as she put something on the counter, walked up to me with her stoned eyes and the last thing she said was, "For you, the first is free, but the rest will cost ya." And she was gone.
I didn't want to know what she left on the counter, Of course you do Chris, you want to forget and whatever she gave you will do just that.
The bell rang before I could decide. I grabbed the baggy without looking at it and ran into the closest stall. Once I was behind the locked door I finally figured out what she left me.
Blue and white pills of all sizes (probably sleeping aids or anxiety reducers)
White powder, probably cocaine (of course it came with a razor blade to make the lines)
And lastly a couple joints, marijuana.
It was like a goody bad from a bad college party.
Am I really going to do this?
Whatever helps.