Room 253
Chapter nine
The door opens and a flushed, smelly Sebastian appears -Oh sweet Gerard, how can I help you?-
-I need my dose.-
-Yup, I'm having a party, come in- I smirk. Just what I need, a drunken Sebastian and his parties. I come inside and the crowd submerges me. The house is small and there is too much people. The heat, the shitty loud music submerge me and leave me alienated. Anyway it does not take long to me to find the alcohol. The drinks are easy to swallow. The sweat, the people press and touches make me lost the connections with my body. I feel like I am in a fishbowl. Nobody can hear my anger, my desperation and I cannot be touched by theirs. I feel some kind of pressure in my lungs. Something from this fucked up picture is missing. I need air. My brain is frigging, burned by all my thoughts and pity. Other hands asking something and refusing something else. I need to shout all the scream inside but i cannot find somebody who gives me the sparkle. My mouth is dry and I suddenly feel all the bitterness coming up from my stomach. I'm choking and I need to throw up. I try to run up the stairs faster than I can, but people are everywhere blocking my passage. I yell and push to make my way. Finally I make it to the bathroom. I don't even have time to lock the door. I'm on my knees, embracing the toilet and vomiting everything I have inside. I flush the toilette. My head starts pumping and aching. I close my eyes and I try to regulate my breath. That's when I notice that the shower water is running.
I smile evilly. Someone must feel really bad. But then, I don't know why. my smile drops. I need to get up. I stumble till the shower, with a sudden curiosity to know who's behind the curtain. I open it and my stomach start to rumble again.
A boy, completely naked is sitting on the shower floor. He has closed eyes and pale skin. I recognize him. He is that boy, the one who had infested my dreams and the one I've tried to forget. My eyes wander on his body and then I'm shocked. The water under his body is red. He's bleeding. I kneel beside him and I raise my hand. I reach out a shaking finger. I touch his cold skin. He doesn't react. I push him again. Nothing. Panic rises up from my bottom. He's so cold and still. I enter the shower box and I try to shake him with both of my hands. Finally I hear some disappointed noises from him. -Please wake up- I say. He shakes his head.
-Please- I repeat.
-Fuck off- he answers. I smile. He is alive. -You need to get up.-
-Fuck off!- his voice is trembling with anger, but I can recognize his desperation. Then he opens his eyes, his beautiful hazel eyes. And he seems to regrets the way he's treated me. But then appear tears and anxiety in those deep wells of him. -Please, leave me alone...- he whispers. -But you are bleeding- he closes his eyes for answer, and turn his head. He
re-collects his body, embracing his legs and letting the water wetting all of him. I can smell waves of pain and reject and other crap from his body. Whatever he has said I don't care. I just can't fuck off. I need to help him. Something is burning inside of me and my blood is running so fast I bet my veins will collapse. I am desperate, hopeless, consumed by my acids and stupid thoughts. I've lost everything and I've never achieved nothing. But I am sure as the earth and water and air can be. I am not leaving without him.
-I need my dose.-
-Yup, I'm having a party, come in- I smirk. Just what I need, a drunken Sebastian and his parties. I come inside and the crowd submerges me. The house is small and there is too much people. The heat, the shitty loud music submerge me and leave me alienated. Anyway it does not take long to me to find the alcohol. The drinks are easy to swallow. The sweat, the people press and touches make me lost the connections with my body. I feel like I am in a fishbowl. Nobody can hear my anger, my desperation and I cannot be touched by theirs. I feel some kind of pressure in my lungs. Something from this fucked up picture is missing. I need air. My brain is frigging, burned by all my thoughts and pity. Other hands asking something and refusing something else. I need to shout all the scream inside but i cannot find somebody who gives me the sparkle. My mouth is dry and I suddenly feel all the bitterness coming up from my stomach. I'm choking and I need to throw up. I try to run up the stairs faster than I can, but people are everywhere blocking my passage. I yell and push to make my way. Finally I make it to the bathroom. I don't even have time to lock the door. I'm on my knees, embracing the toilet and vomiting everything I have inside. I flush the toilette. My head starts pumping and aching. I close my eyes and I try to regulate my breath. That's when I notice that the shower water is running.
I smile evilly. Someone must feel really bad. But then, I don't know why. my smile drops. I need to get up. I stumble till the shower, with a sudden curiosity to know who's behind the curtain. I open it and my stomach start to rumble again.
A boy, completely naked is sitting on the shower floor. He has closed eyes and pale skin. I recognize him. He is that boy, the one who had infested my dreams and the one I've tried to forget. My eyes wander on his body and then I'm shocked. The water under his body is red. He's bleeding. I kneel beside him and I raise my hand. I reach out a shaking finger. I touch his cold skin. He doesn't react. I push him again. Nothing. Panic rises up from my bottom. He's so cold and still. I enter the shower box and I try to shake him with both of my hands. Finally I hear some disappointed noises from him. -Please wake up- I say. He shakes his head.
-Please- I repeat.
-Fuck off- he answers. I smile. He is alive. -You need to get up.-
-Fuck off!- his voice is trembling with anger, but I can recognize his desperation. Then he opens his eyes, his beautiful hazel eyes. And he seems to regrets the way he's treated me. But then appear tears and anxiety in those deep wells of him. -Please, leave me alone...- he whispers. -But you are bleeding- he closes his eyes for answer, and turn his head. He
re-collects his body, embracing his legs and letting the water wetting all of him. I can smell waves of pain and reject and other crap from his body. Whatever he has said I don't care. I just can't fuck off. I need to help him. Something is burning inside of me and my blood is running so fast I bet my veins will collapse. I am desperate, hopeless, consumed by my acids and stupid thoughts. I've lost everything and I've never achieved nothing. But I am sure as the earth and water and air can be. I am not leaving without him.
♠ ♠ ♠
Thank you very much angy_kaulitz and Ashlie_Addiction, I really really appreciate your kindness.And a thank you to all you silent readers, you're also so sweet.