Save You From Him

I slump into my seat in Art class. I'm exhausted. I couldn't go to sleep last because I couldn't stop thinking. I really wish our thoughts had an on and off switch. I was thinking about the good things and the bad things too.

I haven't talked to anyone today because of how tired I am. I didn't even talk to Jay Jay.

I groan and close my eyes. The next thing I know I feel someone's hands gripping my shoulders. I open my eyes and meet those mesmerizing blue eyes I am so familiar with. Chase has a small amused smile on his face.

"Hey sugar," he says. I swear he calls me that just to see me blush. "Try to stay awake so you won't fall off your chair".

"Thanks Chase," I mumble, embarrased. He chuckles and plops down in the chair next to me. I let out a big yawn, to tired to feel embarrased.

"Hey, um, did I do anything wrong?" Chase asks nervously. I raise an eyebrow at him. "You haven't talked to me all day, so I thought you were avoiding me for what happened yesterday?"

My eyes widen. "Oh no Chase!" I say quickly. "I'm not avoiding you!" I blush at the upcoming thing I'm about to say. "I had a lot of fun yesterday. I wouldn't avoid you for what happened yesterday. But I'm sorry you got the wrong impression. I'm just really tired and can't be social today."

Chase grins. "Thats great!" He shouts. "Well not that your tired but that you liked yesterday and.....youknow what I mean." I giggle at his exasperated expression.

I hear someone plop down on the chair next to me and turn to them. Of course it's Jay Jay. He grins at me and I quickly peck his cheek.

"Hi Jay Jay," I murmur my engery being drained after reassuring Chase. "Why so happy today?"

"Hey Terry, Chase," Jay says quickly while bouncing his leg up and down like he always does when he's really happy. "I don't know why I'm so happy. I just am. It's one of those days where you feel really good. You know?"

I nod my head to tired to reply and rest my head on his shoulder. I yawn and Jay Jay uses his avaible hand to smooth down my hair over and over again like he always does when I'm extremely tired. "You should've taken NyQuil like I told you too," he says. I just shrug my shoulders and begin drifting off to sleep.

(******)

It seems like five minutes later when I'm being shaken awake. I open my eyes slowly and look around at my surroundings. I lift my head up. Oh right. I'm in school. In art class. I groan at being woken up.

But then I hear the sound of a slamming door and I jump startled. I loo to my side to see Jay gone. Frankie is standing in front of me and Chase is beside me with a grim look on his face.

"Where's Jay?" I say groggily. I rub my eyes tiredly. I want to get in Jay's soft bed and just sleep. Screw homework.

"He left already," Frankie says cheerfully. I cock my head to the side. That doesn't sound like something Jay would do. He always make me go to his house after school before I went home. It was routine.

"Why'd he leave?" I ask.

"Because of lover boy here," Frankie says still cheerfully. But he has this dreamy look on his face indicating that he wasn't all there. I look over at Chase to see him with his arms folded across his chest and his lip in a thin line. I look at Frankie with questioning eyes. "Lover boy is an idiot, let's just get that out the way." I nod and look at him intently. "You see lover boy was jealous that you was leaning on Jay's shoulder. Lover boy is jealous of Jay because he thinks Jay has the hots for Terry. Which is stupid because Jay is straight and he doesn't even look at you that way. But lover boy is blinded by jealousy and doesn't have his head screwed on correctly. So lover boy gets mad at Jay and says that Jay can't have Terry because Jay smells like shit and can't take care of you because he's a weak ass. Or something like that. I don't know happened after that kindergarten insult. I was daydreaming about Carlos and his sexy ass. Have you checked it out? Nevermind don't check it out because if you do I'll kill you."

I absorb this in while nodding my head. I look over at Chase to see him pouting like a child. "Your always with him and your always going to him with your problems and leaning on him or kissing his cheek or hugging him," Chase says. I roll my eyes.

"That's because I love him Chase," I say softly, not wanting to deal with this. I'm just to tired. "He's my best friend/brother. What do you expect me to do?"

"I want you to always be with me and come to me with your problems and lean on me and kiss me, on the lips though and hug me." He looks down and I swear I hear him say "and I want you to love me", but I just decide to ignore that.

"Chase I do that with Jay because I've known him since I was born. It's really hard for me to trust people and that includes you Chase. You just have to give me some time to get used to you." They're both looking at me but I don't care. When I'm tired and have a headache I'm not the mumbling, shy, blushing virgin Terry. I'm the 'I'm tired and don't feel like being the real me' Terry. I don't have the energy to mumble or blush or shy. I don't like being woken up. Whether it's day or night I have to wake up on my own. That's how it is if someone wakes me up. Except for Kyle. Then all I feel is fear.

"But that could take ages," Chase whines. I smile a small smile.

"Don't worry Chase." I feel my face start to heat up a little from what I'm about to say. "I only have eyes for you." Chase face breasks into a shit eating grin.

"Good," He says happily. "I only have eyes for you too sugar. Now let's go meet my cousin."

(*******)

We stop in front of Chase's house. Jay was following in his car with Carlos and Frankie. I know he's probably annoyed he had to drive those two crazy people. The two of them together equals one annoyed person. Whether it be Jay me or Chase.

In front of Chase's house on the lawn sat a black haired girl looking up at the sky. When I get out and walk closer I realise she has headphones in her ears. That doesn't seem to bother Chase though.

"Hey Jessie!" Chase shouts and then kicks her gently on her thigh. She groans and sit up.

"What do you want you annoying brat of a cousin?" She says. But then she smiles at him, stands up and wipes her shirt and jeans off for possible grass. She smiles at all of us brightly. "I'm Jessie! Unfortunately I am related to Chase."

"Hey!"Chase protest, pouting. Jessie just giggles and roll her eyes. She walks up to Carlos first and he sticks out his hand for her to shake. She looks at it for quite some time befoore just pulling Carlos into a bear hug. I smile softly. But I'm feeling sad because she seems just like my mother.

When she backs away Carlos smiles happily and says, "Hi I'm Carlos. Your hugs could make the devil bow at your feet." I let out a soft scoff at Carlos silliness.

"Thank you Carlos. And your soft skin feels as smooth as a babies bottom." He nods happily and brags about his compliment. Frankie pouts and complains that his skin isn't as soft as a babies bottom.

Jessie moves on to Jay skipping Jay because she already knows him. "My my, I bet you have the ladies wrapped around your finger, don't you mister stud muffin?" I burst out laughing. Stud Muffin? Jay smiles confidently.

"No I don't actually. I'm not easy. I don't put my private parts just anywhere. Thank you very much. I'm Jay by the way." He brushes her hair back but she doesn't blush and giggle like all those other idiot girls at school. She just looks at him unimpressed.

"Well Jay if your trying to flirt by putting my hair behind my ear you have another thing coming to you. NEXT PERSON!" Jessie moves onto me but not before sending Jay a little wink. She looks at me and places both hands on my face. "Oh he is so precious Chase!" She gushes. "I could just eat him up!." I close my eyes and pretend that she's my mom. She's so much like her. So much.

I feel a ping in my chest. But to soon it's over.

"Let's sit down and get to know Jessie," Jay suggest. Her soft warm hand moves from my face and I sigh feeling cold again.

That's what we do too. We just sit on Chase's lawn and talk. Well I'm not paying attention. I'm thinking about my mom. Her soft warm hands, her bubbly attitude, her awful cooking. She use to read to me too. All the time. I know what your thinking. Aren't you a little to old to have your mom read to you? No I'm not. Your never to old for your mother to read to you. I cherished those times. But what I really loved is when she sung this one song to me.

I put my hands behind my back to keep myself proped up. I throw my head back so the little bit of sun is on my face. I imagine the wind is my mother running her fingers through my hair. I also pretend my mom's lips are by my ear as she begins to sing.

You Are My Sunshine
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are grey.
You'll never know, dear,
How much I love you

I feel one lone tear trying to make it's way out of my eye. My heart is breaking and I just can't take it. Jessie brought back feelings that I've tried to keep it at a distance. I stop breathing when I feel one of those soft warm hands covering mine.

"Terry are you okay?" Jessie ask in that motherly tone of hers.

That lone tear makes it's way out of my eye as I pretend my mom is singing it, sounding like she's fading away.

Please don't take my sunshine away