Status: Completed

Psyche

24

Jamie leans against the door with his heart thumping against his ribs, chest rising to the rhythm of it. Girlie’s not in the living room, so she should be in her bedroom. He hopes she’s asleep and didn’t stay awake to see him home. He doesn’t want her to see the way he looks. He wouldn’t be able to explain it.

Then again, she probably wouldn’t even notice.

He looks out the window to see if Jean is still there. An empty street with one street lamp down the road leers at him. The inside of him feels brighter than it.

He doesn’t let Girlie know he’s home; instead he falls into his warm bed and sleeps without a lingering thought. He dreams of nothing, not of the concert, of Jean, or nightmares.

Come morning Jamie can only feel a shadow of last night, a deep remaining that leaves him questioning how could it had ever felt so good. He wonders if Jean’s waking up at the moment, thinking last night was shit and he’s never inviting Jamie again.

Jamie hauls out of bed and makes his way downstairs. He can hear Girlie bustling around the kitchen and the radio playing some talkshow. Zack is there at the table and Jamie keeps his gaze away, walking over to Girlie who stands at the counter mixing a bowl of pancakes.

“Morning,” she greets. “Why didn’t you tell me you were home last night? I didn’t wake up till thirty minutes ago.”

“I forgot,” he says. He keeps his body pressed against the counter but Zack’s eyes press harder. “I was tired.”

“You have fun?” She walks over to the stove, leaving him.

”Yeah.” Jamie counts a few seconds, and then turns around.

Zack is no longer looking at him, however he asks, “Where’d you go?”

“I went to a concert with a friend.”

“With that one girl? Sabrina?” Zack looks up briefly, but Jamie is already handing back toward the stairs.

“Alexandria. And no, it was another friend from school.”

”I think he has a name, Jamie,” Girlie interrupts.

Jamie ponders how well he can play forgetful, or hope Girlie won’t try to correct him if he makes up a name. Jamie lingers in the archway. A throbbing begins in the middle of his skull that spreads all over. He can’t tell if Zack is looking at him.

“My friend Jean,” and he leaves quickly so he can’t answer anymore questions.

Zack doesn’t need to know about Jean.
♠ ♠ ♠
"Remember that cake is good and the world is happy."
A 12-year-old told me that once . . .