Forevermore

The rain fell gently onto the young maiden as she stood in the garden, surrounded by nothing but short grass and moist air at the moment. It was the first rain of the year, signaling spring had finally arrived and chased winter away. Before long, the garden would be filled with colors once more. The flowers would bloom to their fullest and bring life to this garden, as if the rainbow had fallen and painted the garden with its wonders, yet the girl had no interest in the marvelous display. The garden could be filled with dead plants and she wouldn’t have bat an eyelash about it. Perhaps it was because it was something mundane to her as she could see the blossoms year after year; perhaps it was because her running dislike for livid colors; or perhaps it was both.

She lifted her hands, placing them in front of her with her palms facing the cloud-covered skies, catching the raindrops. The condensed water was cool against her warm skin, sending a small shiver to her, as her soaked dress did. Stained with raindrops, the azure cloth had gradually turned into a deeper shade of blue like the depths, and the loose dress was beginning to cling onto the wearer’s petite body.

Closing her eyes, she imagined a life of being an ordinary girl. A life where she could’ve climbed trees, where manners were not an important part of her life, where she could socialize with others instead of staying in the house regardless of weather or her health, where she would live in a small, broken house with a poor family and nosy siblings—A place of poverty, but treated normally and lived how an ordinary child would—merrily and happily, naïve and carefree about the world itself. What was wrong with being a commoner if it meant enjoying happiness that she could never find in the life of luxury?

Thin, crescent moon like brows furrowed together at the thought; pink lips curled upward at the corners, forming into a soft smile. Her onyx eyes narrowed ever so little, but the light in them dimmed, as if they were coated by a layer of frost. Raindrops slid down her marble-smooth face, leaving invisible trails. If one didn’t know better, he would have suspected it was the girl’s tears. Her delicate features remained ethereal as ever, yet her smile brought a sense of sadness, of tragic.

Pitiful, she thought, directing the insult at herself. She should have known—she knew—that it was impossible, and daydreaming about being a normal girl while complaining about her life was a pathetic way to deal with the harsh reality. She had accepted this fact long time ago—the same time she abandoned her childhood and dreams—so why was she drowning in that pointless illusion again? Her smile changed in accordance with her raging thoughts, transforming into a cynical smirk before ending in a vicious snarl.

Who had decided her life? Who had sealed her fate as something like this? Why was she destined to be this…monstrosity?

‘Please come back inside, young miss,’ came a barely audible voice. ‘You’ll be sick.’

Opening her eyes, the said girl tilted her head and angled her body slightly to the source. She glanced over her shoulder to see one of her personal maid, Xiao Lan, standing by door to her room with a worried look.

The younger girl was two years younger than herself, at the age of fifteen. Despite of their small age gap, everything about them contrasted each other, from their looks to personalities. Xiao Lan tied her hair into twin buns, as required by the master and mistress, whereas the elder girl tied part of her hair into a loose bun with a silver hairpin with a few transparent gems hanging from it, the rest cascaded down her back and past her slim waist; one had a baby-like face with childish looks while the other had a perfectly sculptured profile; the maid wore a simple but brightly colored dress of red and pink, but the young miss wore a multilayered dress with elegant designs and patterns of white and blue, yet despite of the duller choice of colors, it suited her well, bringing forth an aura of grace and purity that nobody dared to get close in fear of tainting it, further adorning her unearthly beauty.

Xiao Lan knew the joy of life; she only had hatred for the world and humanity.

She paused for a while, staring at Xiao Lan as she considered briefly. In spite of their close relationship that was similar to a sister’s, she didn’t want to listen to the younger’s request. Standing under the rain was one of the few choices that she could make herself, and thus she wasn’t planning to give it up just because of a few words or her physical wellbeing. Besides, being sick would not affect her as it would to others. Her parents would scold Xiao Lan for not ‘taking care of her properly’, and then hire the best doctor in town to treat her illness. She would continue to stay inside, as usual, only she had to drink the medicine for a few days before recovering.

What was the difference between that and her usual life?

Xiao Lan watched as the young miss turned her back, facing the walls anew. She knew it was the young miss’ greatest dream to get out of the boundaries, other than the obvious one. She could only imagine what it felt to be a caged bird, yearning for the freedom it deserved but never owned. Although the reason for keeping her within the compound was apparent, Xiao Lan thought it was unreasonable. The young miss didn’t choose to be like this. It simply wasn’t fair. True, she was blessed with a face that a lot of women would die for, and intelligence and grace that only a princess would dream of possessing, and yet, she was cursed with…

‘Please,’ Xiao Lan said, trying to persuade her again. ‘Come back inside, young miss.’
The girl ignored the plea and raised her head, gazing up upon the heavens. It seemed that the rain would not be stopping anytime soon; the clouds were still thick and grey, blocking the blue skies and sunlight entirely. She closed her eyes anew, letting the droplets hit her face freely, as if they could sooth her mind, despite however momentarily the effect was. She closed her hands into fists, releasing a deep breath that she had been holding subconsciously.

‘I hate rain…’ she whispered. No emotion was held in that simple sentence regardless of how she felt.

The wind blew, as if it was responding to her, telling her that it would carry her words and deliver them to the heavens and the faraway land she would never step foot in. Again it blew, except this time, it lifted her long silken hair.

Xiao Lan could only watch with sorrowful eyes as the snow white hair danced freely in the air. She could almost see the ironic smile on the young miss’ face.