So Easy to Love

It’s been about a week since Porsche’s little… intervention. I worry about her all the time. Bobby calls every now and then to give us little updates. So far, I guess she’s doing well… or that’s what Bobby’s telling us. I want to go see her, but I know she told us she wanted to have no communication for three weeks. We only have two more to go.

Tanner’s still out of the racing seat for a little longer. By the time Porsche’s better, he should be able to race again. He whines about it every damn day. Oh my gosh, he’s such a little whiner. It was cute at first, but now it’s just… annoying. Suck it up, Tanner. You got hurt… deal with it.

Landon’s been the one I’m kind of worried about too. He’s asked about Porsche a lot. Tanner and I can’t tell him that his sister was an alcoholic and is probably going through horrible withdrawal right now and he shouldn’t be around her. We’ve just been telling him that she’s sick… which isn’t really a lie…

“We should help Porsche get better,” he was on it again today.

“Bobby’s helping her,” Tanner spoke up as he reached out for his oldest boy.

“But I want to help too!” he countered.

“What do you want to do for her, bud?” I butted in with Bentley in my arms.

“I don’t know,” he laughed at himself, causing me and Tanner to let out our own fit of laughter.

“We could…” he started to say, wrinkling his features up to show that he was thinking hard… Tanner does that. “We could throw her a party!” he came up with.

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea,” Tanner muttered softly.

“We could have a little get together… without certain drinks…” I debated.

“Or… mommy could make one of her big fancy dinners and we can just celebrate everyone being happy again,” Tanner smiled over at me before his arms found their around their way around my middle.

My smile came over me before he left a soft kiss on my cheek and rested his chin on my shoulder to look down at Bentley. A little sliver of pain shot through my heart though. We still haven’t heard anything about the… paternity test we shipped off. The longer we waited, the more nervous it made me.

But he doesn’t treat Bentley any differently. It’s like a rewind of when Landon was just a baby… except he’s not a sitting image of Tanner. I see more of me in Bentley than I do Tanner. And that scares me. I don’t know how Tanner’s going to react if… the baby isn’t his.

I pushed that out of my mind though. Bentley started fussing. Without saying anything, Tanner gently took him from me and started whispering soothing words to him. It was cute… but it wasn’t working. Quickly, I pushed myself to my feet to get him a bottle. Landon tagged along.

“Honey, you want to check the mail for mommy?” I asked him as I waited for Bentley’s bottle to heat up.

“Will there be anything for me in it?” he asked, sending me a sideways look.

Etnies has been sending little boy things for Landon lately. Every time he gets a package, he thinks it’s Christmas.

“Maybe… why don’t you go look?” I smiled once I saw his face light up.

He took off for the front door. I shook my head through a smile as I took Bentley’s bottle back into the living room and gave it to Tanner. He smiled down at the little boy before leaving a soft kiss on his forehead while he took his bottle. Gosh, it’s so cute.

While I was still enjoying this adorable little sight, Landon came rushing in; a handful of envelopes in his one hand and a box in his other arm. Oh boy. I took the envelopes and he kept the box to try and open. While shuffling through them, it seemed to be the normal, daily mail. Or so that’s what I thought until I got to the last piece of mail. It was from the… DNA center.

“Tan…” I started softly, having a hard time getting that little word out.

He looked over at me before his eyes shifted down to the content in my hands. Once he brought them back, a look of uneasiness came over him. I told him I’d be in the kitchen, meaning I was going to wait until Bentley was asleep to open this. Tanner and I were going to open this… together.

Once he walked in without the baby, he let out a heavy sigh. I slid the envelope over to him when he made it to the counter. He took it slowly and then started to rip it open. When the papers that were inside were free, he put it back down and rubbed his hands over his face.

“I can’t look,” he pushed out in a soft voice.

“We have too,” I replied while rubbing his back.

“You do it,” he mumbled while bringing an arm around me to hold my body against his so that he could hide his eyes in the crook of my neck.

While still rubbing his back with one hand, I took my free one and dug the papers out. A heavy sigh escaped me once they were freed and unfolded. There were a bunch of numbers and percentages that I didn’t really understand what they were, but the only one that mattered was at the bottom.

“Tanner,” I pushed out, feeling a gloss cover my eyes.

“Ellie just tell me,” he spoke with his voice mumbled from him being pressed against my shoulder.

“Possibility of paternity,” I started, feeling a tear roll past my bottom lid, “99.999 percent,” I pushed out, trying so hard to hold everything in.

Tanner didn’t say anything, but his whole body shook from anticipation. I was so relieved. I hugged onto him so tightly, letting my happy tears flow. Once Tanner finally lifted his head up, he showed off his own glossy blue orbs.

“That’s my boy,” he said with his bright smile shining through.

“We need to have a girl to even out everything now,” I teased, causing him to chuckle before he left a loving kiss on my lips.

Once we parted, he went back into the living room and picked Bentley up and then scooped his other boy up, giving both of them kisses. All that was missing was Porsche. But she’s off getting better. Pretty soon we’ll be the happy Foust family again… and everything will be back to normal… or as normal as our life was before.